- Wait, you have a TV? - No, I just like to read the TV guide. Read the TV guide, you don't need a TV. (rock music) - Hello and welcome, it's Wednesday, which means it's time for an all-new episode of TV Guidance Counselor. As always, I am Ken Reid, your TV guidance counselor, and my guest this week is Ms. Christine Elise. Christine, you may know, as Emily Valentine from Beverly Hills 90210, she was also in Child's Play 2, among many, many other things. I always knew her from being an actress and being in these things, but it was recently that I learned that she is from Boston and a former punk rock kid. I saw her being interviewed in the documentaries, All Ages and American Hardcore, it kind of blew my mind. So I contacted her and really wanted to speak with her, and I was not disappointed. This is a really fun, fascinating interview. She's great, you should also read her book. She wrote a great book called Baving in the Single Girl that you can get on Amazon or from her site, Christine Elise.com. I'll put all those links up on tvguidancecounselered.com, but you definitely should check it out. So enjoy this episode of TV Guidance Counselor with my guest, Christine Elise. (rock music) (rock music) - Christine Elise, thank you so much for meeting me here and doing this. - Let it go. Thanks for having me. - We're at your local watering hole here in Hollywood. - Indeed. - Which sounds very, very exciting. And it is, I wanted to talk to you specifically because I've seen you in a ton of television stuff over the years. But then I was really surprised, I was watching two different documentaries about the Boston punk rock in general, and you showed up and now it's shocked at it, because number one didn't know you were also from Boston, but also didn't know that you were like a fellow punk rock kid, which is always fascinating to me. And just kind of how you get from that to here and being, you know, like 9 or 2 or whatever. Like it seems like a huge thing to me. - It, yeah, I guess it does seem like that, and if I look back at the actual dates of, if I left Boston in '84, and I did that on 2 and 0, I think in '91, living it, it felt like life time is a part, like, you know, like what my life in Boston was so separate from my life here, and then life, it's not, not actor, and then life as an actor, it felt like, it felt like eons of time. - Right, right, right. - But from this perspective, from 2015, it's a very short time. - Right, it's like six years. - Massive changes, massive, massive changes in my life. But how I did it, I mean, it wasn't even a plan. I was in Boston, I was going to school in Boston, I'm from Boston, I'm from Boston, I'm from Boston. - I'm from Boston. - And I did not wear this shirt on purpose. - Yeah, it just happened to pull it out? - Yeah, so I, who were hiking this morning? So I'm dirty and sweaty in it, and I'm like-- - Sounds like Rosalindale. - I was gonna change, I was like, oh no, I shouldn't change it. - I did one with, I did an episode lagging with Billy West yesterday, who's also from Rosalindale. - Really? - I didn't know that. - I didn't know that. - I didn't know that. - Rosalindale. - It's pretty specific. So, anyways, I left Boston and I came here to go to film school. - Okay, so you wanted to do, I wanted to be a writer, director? - I wanted to be a director. - Okay. - I thought, I didn't know, I'd never known anybody who'd done anything ever in the movie industry. Only no musicians. - Right, 'cause Boston is so isolated in a lot of ways. It's very provincial and people don't really ever leave, and it's really like LA seems like an other planet. It's so full. - It is, in all the ways that are good. - Yes, absolutely, 100% good care. - I'm really glad that I grew up in Boston. I'm glad I'm from the Northeast. I think there's a sensibility there, a braziness that comes in a wall bustingness that comes from being from there, which I'm happy to, I'm really grateful for. - Right. - I could never live there again though. - Yeah, the more I come out here, I have the same exact feeling, and I don't know if you experienced this, but everyone's still ridiculously nice out here. I have no evil intentions ever, but when I first came out of here, my Northeast kicked in and I was like, they have no defenses. - Yeah, they could conquer them. - They could conquer them. - They're like, they're like, they couldn't. - They could annex California. - Yeah, it seems like they don't even know. - So you're in annex California? - Yes, that's the plan. - Wow, that's a lot of fun. - This is too nice out here. - It'll be West Boston. - Yeah, exact Boston West, so. So yes, I went to BU for a year, and you know, I think it's really common for people. Not everyone, obviously, but a lot of people. And in most people fall into something, they knew somebody else that did it. - Right. - Because that makes out of people. Oh, look, a lawyer, I know, oh, look. You, how do you ever become the guy that like, distributes vegetables to grocery stores? Only if you knew someone that did it before. - You know, they made a living, and that's a living. - That's a possibility. - Yeah, 'cause you would never think that that's a thing people did it. - There's so many jobs, none of us think of, you know? And so, but my stepdad was a drummer, and he owns a recording studio in Cambridge called New Alliance. - Oh, yeah, I know New Alliance. - Yes, my parents. - Okay, all right. - We've recorded in there. - Really? It's my parents, who was the engineer? - I don't remember, it was probably the mid 90s. - Yeah, my parents. - I don't remember, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Was it Mick? - It might have been. - Savon? - I'd have to look. - You did like a seven-inch in there, in them. - My parents owned that. - Okay, oh, cool. - So, I had that, and he's, and my stepdad, Alvin, is a watercolorist, and installation piece artist, and collage artist, and my mother's a photographer. And so, that's the artwork. - Arts background, right. - That's the thing, yeah. So, I was like, okay, well, I didn't want to be a musician, and I, and I wish I had known that, like, I wish I had had the guidance, then someone would say, "Well, you like photography?" He should be a cinematographer. - Right. - You would never think that you'd put those things together, though, like, I think people don't understand the mechanics of the behind-the-scenes. - Yeah, stuff. - And if they do, it kind of might be, like, writer, director, but not the 200 other positions. - Not the trade, not the trades. - Yeah, the trades, stuff, right. - Not the trades that are in there. - Right. - And that's my new advice to everybody, when anyone asks about getting into movies, and then I talk about trades all the time. - Right. - And so, you think about it as the glory jobs. - You think about being an inaugural director, like, the glory ones. - It's like only thinking that there are race car drivers and no mechanics. - Right, exactly. - Like, you would never even think about that thing. - And race car drivers have a short career and mechanics don't. - Right, right. - So, it's exactly that. And so, I was like, "Oh, I know what I'll do. "I love film noir. "I love the pulp fiction novels." That's what we call the collector of '30s, pulp fiction. - Yep, yep. - And I was like, "Okay, well, and I saw a blame runner." And I was like, "Oh, look, that's a reinvention "of film noir." And I think it's really, completely restyled film noir. And I would like to take that baton and go on and recreate film noir in that way. And I will be a director and do that thing. I went to BU for a year, in the first year of BU. You don't have any real film that is doing your own requisite shit. - Right. - Learning Spanish and going to science class. - Economics, yeah. So, history. And so, I did a year there. The policies at BU pissed me off. It's a long and boring story, but they would just not fluid enough, as far as letting you change things to see what your ultimate goal was. - Right, which is so weird, 'cause if you're 18, you shouldn't have to know what you want to do for the rest of your life with a degree. And you would think that someone would want to encourage you, like, "I went, I did this, "and I realized I don't want to do this thing." - You know, it was even dumber than that. Actually, it's not that long of a story. I took one of the requisite classes I had to take was a computer class, computer programming. And it was Pascal, you were writing computer language. With a little turtle, and the basic, you know. - Kyno, colon, colon, backslash, backslash. - The spruce washed. - Yeah, and make a pyramid out of numbers. And so, I took that as a requisite. And I loved it. It was the most challenging thing I'd ever done. And just when I thought that I couldn't fucking do it, I had figured it out. It was really a gratifying class. And so, for my second science requisite, I wanted to take that class 201, not, you know? - Right, right, right. - You're gonna take astronomy 101, or take another-- - That's ridiculous, yeah. - But no, why should I take two useless entry classes? When I can take this one that I love, a second level up. - And I'm paying for it as well. - And they said, "No, you have to use it as one of your electives." And I did, that's how much I loved it. I didn't take a film class, and I took a fucking second computer class, because I got a bad night professor that sucked and maybe unlearned everything I had learned. - Right, right, right. - And I was so bitter about that whole experience. - 18,000 dollars a year, I fuck you. - Yeah, and this is what I'm paying for. You should be, it's still we're with college where they, I went to Northeastern, which I, kind of referenced, I didn't really get anything out of it, but you would think that any other thing you were paying a ton of money for, they'd bend over backwards to make you happy, and college is like the exact opposite. - They're like, fuck you, yeah. - So, I left, and I moved here. I thought, hey, what's it, what, at the time, in '84, Reaganomics hadn't quite killed the state school system here, UCLA, it was like $600 a year for a California resident. - That's not bad. - $600 a year. - That's not bad at all, yeah. - And I'm paying 18,000 of it ever in Boston, so I like-- - I could go to UCLA for 120 years. - Yes, go back to my life. And so, I thought, hey, I'll move to California, take a year off, establish residency, and then I'll go to one of the state schools and open it. And then in the meantime, I can do internships, I can learn my way around, I can, like, and not land in LA with a bullshit degree from Boston and not even know what intersection is, what, in town. - And you were also hanging out a lot at the, like, the rat in the punk rock scene in Boston, too. So, I imagine that what was going on here appealed for that reason as well. - No. - No, not at all? - No. - Okay. - I was so burnt out in the whole punk rock thing. I was going to shows with my parents when I was 15. - Okay. - I was showed out by the time I came here. And so, and the hardcore music was never my vibe. I was more into the broader punk scene. - Yeah. - I was like, we are, my band that I was in in the 90s sounded like early 80s Boston hardcore, but we were playing with all these, like, boy-styled music. - Boy, wow. - It was very weird. And I was always like, this is more fun for us to play than to listen to. And I actually was listening to, like, prints and depends. - I was too. I saw prints at Spit in LA. - Okay. - In, like, 1980, 80s, I think. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So I totally sipped up that scene. - I don't know. XTC and second-level cameras and the cramps and sitting in the bitches and, like, the whole, yeah. Wow, how's all that? So back I was in a fucking bar half the size and this worked out this bar. - That's amazing. - And so, that was my musical interest slide, but I was a kid. - Right. - And the punk, the hardcore scene had kids. - Yeah, oh, absolutely. - And so, and they were, they were then and remained my best friend. And so, those are my family, those people still. - Those are the kids I kind of, when I think of people, like, the way other people think of kids they went to high school with, when they think of those kids fondly, which I don't, but the kids I think that way are the kids I know from, like, that scene. - It's like, it's like, chosen family. Like, a lot of people were friends with the kids they go to school with. I was friends like, no one, I went. One person. - Right. - A Boston person who you also know, Michael Patrick McDonald, who wrote all schools and, - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Sugar rising. - Oh, yeah. - He was the other punk rock person at Boston left. - Yeah. - And so, the two of us, like, gravitate, like, in 1980, they weren't a lot of punk rock kids, you know? - Because those are the people your friends with from common interest and not just because of proximity. - Yeah, to that, not convenience, but actual genuine interest. And Michael's coming to my birthday party next to turn 50 next month. Michael's coming in for-- - Oh, yeah. - And happy birthday for an event. - Thank you. - As is Jamie Sharappa, who was the bass player in SSD. - Oh, yeah, yeah. - They're coming, they're family, they're my family. - Yeah. - So, anyway, it came here, I went to, we had to get a real job, it worked as a cashier on Rodeo Drive and making $6 an hour and had to work 60 hours a week to pay my $400 a month rent, and I couldn't afford to go to school. - Right. - I couldn't afford, I couldn't-- - $600 a month was going to work, you know? So, I couldn't, okay, I can afford the 600 million, but what am I gonna go? - The time is up there, yeah. - So, I just didn't like classes at L-A-C-C, and it's like, okay, at this rate, I'll graduate in 18 years for the degree from the shitty company. - Right, right. - You know? - And then I was like, what else could I do? Well, I'm gonna be a direct, direct, direct classist, I don't know anything about acting. - So, I understand how to direct people? - Yeah, and then I was like, well, this isn't as scary as I thought, this is actually kind of fun. - But you had not been interested in any kind of performance before that, because music didn't do it or anything like that. - I'm too shy, I was too shy. - Okay. - Way too shy. - Okay. - Despite seemingly aggressive and presentational, because of what I addressed and stuff and inviting a lot of flag, that was very different for me than performing that was not asking for your approval. - Right. - Performance is asking for approval. - It's almost the opposite actually. - It is. - It's asking for your disapproval. - Exactly. - It's kind of like, get away from me if you don't like this and I don't have to talk to you. - Like you. - Yeah. - And it's a filter. - Yeah. - So performance is asking for approval. - Right. - And I'm not happy with that. - Right. - And so, but it actually isn't that. And it actually isn't that. - But it definitely seems like that when you're thinking about it before you actually start doing it. - I'm gonna do this and people have to like it. - Right. - And so I did it and I was like, oh, you know, maybe I could do this thing. Maybe I could get it being after. I may not be talented, but talentless actors work all the time. I don't know why I can't do one of them. So, I'll just do that. You know, what else can I do? How else can I get in the film industry with no training, no talent, no skills? - Right. - I'll be an actor. - Very tradesmen like approach though, which I think is partly a very Northeast thing. - Yeah, my dad was a roofer. My actual actual birth dad was a roofer. And yeah, it's a very sort of pragmatic, you know. - Yeah, just get down to it and you're just, you know, you've punched in a core kind of thing. - I did this, it's worth this. - Right, exactly. It's not like I'm gonna be a movie star. This is my dream. It's totally practical. - Mm-hmm. I'll fix your toilet that costs $100. - Right, exactly. - And I'm more comfortable with that right away. - Yeah. Well, it's so much more black and white than two. - Yeah, yeah. - Like you never like, well, I had a guy fix my toilet last week and I kind of liked the week. It just, they both worked, but the way he did it is so much more appealing to me. - Yeah. I don't know what it was. He was gonna zip up. - Yeah. - So, yeah, so I decided to become an actor and I looked really young. I was probably 22, 22 at the time. I looked very, very, every minute of 15. - Right, which really appealed out here. - It's a really huge advantage for any actor to be over 18 and be able to play under 18. - Right. - And you can work adult hours. And two year more sophisticated. - Right. - You come think with a lot more going on. - Right. - And I was a more sophisticated 22 year old than your average one. - I really got a lot to kids stuff. And I worked right away. I worked a lot right away. I got really mad. - The first thing I remember seeing you in was a bunch of episodes of "Head of a Class" I think. - Yeah. - 'Cause that was probably like-- - Very early. - Very early, right? - And that was really bad. - What happened to you? - Watch 'em. - I'm unbelievable, whatever. - Yeah. - I'm unbelievably bad. - I would disagree. - No, you have to watch it when you see it. You can see how uncomfortable I am. How bad the humor is. You can see like the comfort on my face. - Yeah, like, and also, did you ever watch three cameras? It comes like that at the time that-- - I watched three companies. - Right, right, right. - Yeah, you can't avoid that. - I know, that's true. - All in the family. - Everyone was on the phone. - As a three camera show. - Yeah, yeah. - Five cameras, three cameras at the time. - But "Head of the Class" was like, was that the first sort of live audience through camera thing? - No, no, Lucy. Was it Lucy that live audience? - No, no, for you. I mean-- - Oh, yeah. It's my earliest job. - 'Cause that's jumping in right into the deep end. Because not only are you acting, but you're basically doing stage acting and TV acting at the same time. - I never thought of it that way. Everything was so terrorizing. - Right. - I was so excited and happy and terrified. - Right. - It didn't matter, all of it was the same. - Right. When you did that, did you know that it was gonna be a reoccurring? 'Cause I think you did like three or four episodes. - No, actually the first episode I did with Leah Remini, on the King of Queens. - Yes. - She and I did our first episode of that show together and each of us had one line. My line was, "Oh, Eric, 420." And her line was like, "Eric, I'll see you at 430." - Right. - And I don't know which character Eric was, but all of us had dates with him. - Yeah, it was the classic episode where someone has two dates to the prom, essentially, which is like every single sitcom with anyone at age 20. - Right, exactly. - Yeah. - And so Leah Remini and I had that, so I know her from that. - Right. - And I didn't know who we were occurring. It wasn't meant to be recurring. I auditioned another time for the show, or that character was that. - Right, right. - And no reason, she didn't do any of it that prohibited from going to any character. - Yeah. - And so auditioned and got auditioned twice, you know. - Right, for the same role, basically. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - 'Cause I didn't, continuity was not a big thing. - It was a different character and it was a specific character. And I did something actually, the reason I got the job, John Levy cast that show. John Levy also cast China Beach and ER. - Yeah, which you did, as well. - John has been one of the greatest supporters of my career. And in the audition for the Rhonda feel good, feel good, second time I was at the show. - The love and trust of Arvid. - Have Arvid, yeah. She has to like try to seduce Arvid. And in the audition room, I was reading, it wasn't even planned or anything. And it's sort of, I'm impressed with myself in retrospect. I'm reading it when I was doing the scene, I got up from the scene chair they had me in and sat on the couch with the person that was reading with me. And I got it in their space. - Just like in the natural, this is what you would do. - Yeah, yeah. - I'm telling you I'm a so talentless actress. I was so talentless. And I don't know how or what provoked me to do that, but that's what I did. And I know that's why I got the job. - But that's probably not a talent thing. I think that works in your favor where it's like you haven't sort of unlearned normal human behavior. So you're probably just being very natural if I'm talking to somebody that's what I'm gonna do. And that probably works to your advantage. - I don't think I'm anywhere near that natural anymore. - Okay, you might be right. - So that was the first major thing that I could think of that I saw you in. It sounds like it was probably one of the first major things. - It was, yeah. The first thing I ever did was a movie of the week called "The Towned Billie." Or I think it's when I got it, it was called "The Towned Billie." I think now I think it aired as a friendly, quiet friend of the little town. - Okay, was that like, did your family like work? Oh, watching it, was it a big deal? - Oh my God. - I imagine that was just like-- - Oh my God. - Yeah. - It got me my sad card. - I got paid like 1,500 bucks a week. - Right. - For three weeks in a row, it was unbelievable, which was like minimum at the time. I got paid the minimum and it was a lot of it. - Right, you're like, I made it, that's it. - Yeah, look at me, and then the right is straight happened. While I was shooting it in '88, that was '88, and then there was no work in town for like a year. It was a bad time even for me, but yeah, that was my first job. - So what was, your parents don't like they're probably supportive of you, you're starting to do that 'cause they're artists, right? 'Cause I've noticed a lot of people who, especially from where the area, where from, their parents, even if they're on a major TV show are like, okay, this is great. When are you gonna get that real job? - Get a real job. - I mean, some of them it takes one role within the parents are like, oh, okay. - Yeah, they get to go with the role or something. - Yeah, I guess it's a real job now, but luckily it sounds like you didn't have to have that. - They did not, and I don't know that I would have been able to do it if I had that in pressure. - Right, right, I imagine that would be-- - First, the first two years, I had a Boston in '84, and I had no, I didn't leave Boston, Boston with any sense of a great affection for Boston, but I came here, I missed it horribly. - Yeah, it's so different. I mean, you, whenever I'm here, I'm over it a bit now, but you don't feel more from Boston than when you're here, at first. It's just, you realize all these things that are inherent to the character of people from Boston, that you didn't realize were unusual, especially did you really travel at all before you moved here that much? - Yeah, I came here a couple times. - Okay, yeah. - I didn't do a lot of traveling, but I came to Detroit. - Right, right, right, right, right, right. - It was like you went to Detroit, it's fine. - I've been to all of New England. Yeah, I've been to New York a couple times. - But not, but probably not somewhere as different as this is living here, where all of a sudden, you're like, oh, everybody doesn't punch everyone as their first number. - Right, exactly. Fuck you, isn't it, is an affectionate phrase. - If you do something well, people aren't like, who the fuck do you think you'll ever go like? - Exactly. - You don't rise above your station, exactly. - So, that kind of stuff-- - I didn't miss, I didn't miss the negative shit, but I missed my friends, I missed my parents, I missed, you know-- - The stability kind of thing. - I was alone, I didn't know anyone, I came here at 19, I didn't know anyone. - Right. - And the people I worked with, there was nobody that I identified with them remotely. - Totally, I did a lot of reading, I read a book a day, I read a lot. - Were you stuck it out, though? I mean, it sounds like, was there a time where you were like, I just said I'm gonna go back, or-- - I don't know if my mother crying once a week, and she'd be like, that's it, I was gonna fly out in there and help you pack and make you home, and I'm like, no, no, no. And that's the only pressure I got was from my mother who was so eager to get me back, and I'm an only child, so-- - Okay, so, and they just missed having a good one. - But it was, as supportive, it was you being supportive. - Right, she wasn't trying to sabotage you, so you go back, it was like, if you need to come back, I can make it happen, it can happen tomorrow. - Do that tomorrow, yeah. - So, so yeah. - So, you got, what a weird, same person cast and head of the class in China Beach and E.R. - I know, resume, yeah. - And I think you're probably the only person I can think of that was on all three of those shows as well. Maybe China Beach and E.R. had some other crossover. - A lot of crossover. - Yeah, I can't think of any head of the class people that were on either of those shows. - No, but you thought you didn't know that Brad Pitt did head of the class? - I did know. - You read the same season I did, I think. - Yes, he played Robin Givens boyfriend. - I don't know. - He was abusive as well, he was abusive. - Didn't they date in real life? - I think they did. - He was also in growing brains at the time where he was like a dickhead rock star. - I didn't know that. - He was in a ton of weird things like that. - Yeah, pretty. - Yeah, oh yeah, they were hiring and everything. And the difference in like there were people who just kept showing up on sitcom after sitcom after sitcom that someone at the network was like, this guy, I'm putting him in everything. - The team that was Remini, the Remini was that girl. They tried her in a million pilot. - She was on the Who's the Baspina for a while. - And the Model Zinc, the Model Zinc model, the modeling show. The modeling show that was spin up on Who's the Baspina was called Living Dolls. - Okay, yes. - And Holly Berry was on it. - Okay, I didn't know that. I just wanted to lay it as a newly as I was watching her trajectory. - Yeah. - She's from Long Island or something, I think as well, right? - Yeah. - And that's what there was like in Northeast. - She's definitely new. - Yeah. - And she's about to say about the balance. - The town goes, this person, it's going to happen for this person. - Right. - And that was her. - I was never, I'm the person that any success I've had, it despite everybody. - Right, right. - Despite my own team. - Right. - Despite my own agents. - Would be like, you're not getting anything? - Like, uh, you know, oh, you got this job, don't rock the boat, I go ask for more money, I can get more, no, no, no, you got the job. I can't believe you got the job. - But it's like, isn't that your job to get me more money? - No one can ever believe I ever got a job ever. - Really? - Mm-hmm. - That's very, very dismountable. - And it sounds like a bitter actor, like sour grapes talk, I'm telling you, you know. - I mean, you just surprised me based on what I'm familiar with. - It's really, really, no one gets me, it's the East Coast then. - It's true of this. - It's that fucking me, so fucking fucking fucking fucking. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, gosh, it's a hostel. - But none of your roles that I can think of are like that. - No, 'cause that's not who I am. - Right, right. - So if I audition for that job to be like a super-hostile, like, I can't carry that off. - Yeah. - I don't have that in me. - Yeah, yeah. - So, but I also don't have, you know, sugar and spice and everything nice. - Right. - So I own this weird non-zone. - Right. - But it's not a prototypical... - Right, it's not easy for them on the surface to just slot you into a thing and go, that's, 'cause you're not a character actor. - Yeah. - Basically, you don't wanna know what these guys are. - Yeah, I am a character actor, though. - But not a character that they get. - I'm just don't, I just am sort of not easily defined. - Right. - I'm sorry, the chick from that Orphan Show with the girls. - Oh, yeah, Rags to Riches. - Nope, older 70s, Pune did it. - Oh, Orphan Girls. - It's Mindy Cohen. - Oh, thanks a lot. - That's a life. - Yeah, yeah. - Nancy. - Nancy McKeon. - Yeah. - Well, I actually know in real life some of the various that I couldn't pull her name out of my ass, but Nancy McKeon types, so that's what I believe. - Yeah. - Which is that big, tough girl. - Right. - Who's actually really not tough at all. - The tomboy, tough street girl with a... - Who's not... - Tough exteriors hiding a vulnerability. - Funny rabbits aren't threatened by that tough girl. - Yeah. - And that's who I was, but I didn't do sitcoms, so I'm not, I don't, I don't, I don't know. There's a real skill to that kind of comedy, that Matthew Perry and Michael J. Fox, and obviously everybody on Friends and a lot of other actors too, can take it that actually really genuinely isn't funny and make it funny. - Yeah. - I don't have that skill. - You would read the line and be like, "Ugh." - And you can see the pain on my face. And you can see the hate I have for the material in my audition, so I don't get the jobs. - Right. - Or I do think I have a little bit of ability to take the stink off bad dramatic shit. - Right. - Yeah, I do think I can elevate that a little bit, but I can't elevate bad comedy. - Well, the thing I always say too, is like comedy's the one genre that when you fail, it's not enjoyable on any other level. - It's like if you're doing bad drama, it's funny. Like, and if you're in it and you recognize it's bad, you can make it funny. It's like, but bad horror can be funny. Bad comedy is just painful. Like, there's nothing else you can do about it. - And comedy's so subjective too. - Yeah. - Everyone recognizes a much great dramatic performance, but not all comedies, not everyone likes Chris Ross. - Right, exactly. - Not like Chris Ross, but somebody doesn't. - 'Cause you can watch a drama and be like, I didn't like it, but I recognize it was good. - Yeah. - Well, comedy was just like, it's bad. - Why would anyone ever watch that? - Yeah, exactly. - Yeah, my fucking hour and a half back, you know. - You've wasted my time. - I'm older now, and it's your fault. - There's also a weird thing too that I find, and this is more with the stand-up world, that I end up stupidly rolling in. But if you do comedy and people don't like it, they get mad at you for thinking you're funny. - Instead of them being like, do you think you're dramatic? - Yeah, I know. - But it's just comedy where they do that. - That's interesting, I hadn't thought of it that way. - It's very weird. So then I remember seeing you in "Child's Play 2," which was probably the, is it the first - Movie. - Non-TV movie that you had gotten? - Yeah. - And that was-- - No, it might not have been actually. I did a movie called "Defenceless" with Sam Chipper. - Okay. - And "Chick From Beaches." - Oh, which, not Pet Midler, the other one. - Oh, the other one. - What an asshole, why not? - No, I can't remember either. It's Barbara Hershey. - Yes. - Barbara Hershey and Sam Chipper didn't, movie called "Defenceless." I think I may have done that before. - Okay. Did you go to the premiere and all that stuff? - No. - They were big. - Okay. - Did you for "Child's Play 2?" - It was no premiere. - There was no premiere for "Child's Play 2." - No. - The first premiere I ever went to of a movie I was in, was in 2011. - Really? - So... - I was in prom. - Oh yeah, the "Tizzy Summer." And it's the only movie premiere of a movie I've been in that I've ever worked in. I've been into a lot of premieres that I was in. - Right, right, right. - And they didn't know who I was. - Did you know who you were? - So who are you? Why are you here? It was unbelievable. - And you're like, "I'm in this movie." That's very, very strange. Oh my God, I'm sorry that happened to you. I said... Well, you know, I read a novel and I stole little bits and pieces of my life from... It's mostly fiction, but there's some little snippets here and there that I couldn't help but put in it. And I intentionally sort of conflated fiction with reality because... - Right where you know? - You know, of course, but I'm not too... I don't lack imagination to the extent that I can't extrapolate or be inspired by what really happens to make something fake up. - You're not just changing someone's name and other things. - No. - No, but that premiere kind of is in my book. - I mean, that's horrible, but also that's very funny. - It's in my book and I hope it's funny in the book, so... - So I saw "Child's Play 2" with the "Assembly Square" cinemas and some real Massachusetts. - Ah, like, up some? - Somerville, which I very much enjoyed. But that seems to be the thing that probably people that I know would recognize it from the most. And I was never, not surprising for people that listen to the show. I watched a lot of things that appealed to teenage girls for wide variety of reasons. But not until you know, it was a show that I never saw a ton of except for the episode with the cramps. - Which I wrote. - Which you wrote, which I was gonna get to. - Which I wrote. - You wrote three episodes of that show? Two are holiday episodes. One was a Christmas one, one was the Halloween one. - Yes, okay, rain, man. - I never tried to win this stuff when it's very, very up. And so how did, was that the first thing that you wrote that got produced? - Yeah. - So you kind of, what a weird, full circle thing because that's kind of why you came out there and the first place to write and direct. And then you get cast on that into, you know, you're on a whole, I think one season was in the book. - I didn't do a whole season, I didn't get to 10 episodes or something in the second season. - Okay. - And then two more in two subsequent seasons. - So how do you get from acting in it to writing? - Well, I was living with Jason at the time. - Okay. - For a couple, or like five and a half years or something. And so while I wasn't doing this, I was doing other things, working all the time on my own. I was watching him and how he was capitalizing on every opportunity that was there for him. - 'Cause he directs a lot and stuff now. - And he directed, yeah. And he did more than that though, like he was so smart. When I met him on the show, he was 21, he turned 20. I think he turned 22, like during the second episode I did. - Right, right. - And he was such an adult in such a, like the captain of that ship. - Right. - And. - 'Cause it would be easy for I think someone that age in that role in a show that huge to just party. - And be an asshole. - Yeah, be an asshole, yeah. - He was a really smart guy and he did things like, you know the show has to rent walkie-talkie. So he would just buy 200 walkie-talkies with them in a rental house and the show of rent is walkie-talkies. - Oh wow, so he's entrepreneurial. - Yeah, absolutely. And then, or like they had these video games, they would rent for like $10,000 a season. But the show, because of tax laws, the show can't own assets. - Right. - So if they bought them a game, they had to sell it again at the end of the season. So it was, and so they rented it at an exorbitant rate. So he bought the games and they rented it back from him. - That's amazing. - And I was like, look at this, look at this. Like the, like I said earlier about, it did the jobs you, and people around you too. I was like, look at this ship. - Right, he's working the system here. It's about a fucking hothead, you know. He's about $15,000 hothead. He's renting that to some Arnold Schwarzenegger. The minute he bought it, Schwarzenegger rented it for, I think, for a year, you know. And like, oh my God, who would ever think that Far Lea being an actor into these things? - Yeah, yeah. - And investing money to the, it's throwing money back in your face. - All right, which people never think of either because they're like, I'm gonna get this level of money forever. I think a lot of people had that mistake. - Right, right. And it was, and you don't. - No. Jason's still doing really well, but that, but I think it's 'cause he's so fucking smart. So I watched that, and he was directing, and I'm like, you know what, I have an idea for the show. I'm gonna pitch the writing idea for the show, and I went in 'cause I had access that most people wouldn't have. - Right, right, right. - But that was the lesson, like, when you have access. - Use it. - Use it, you know. So I had pitched this idea of the regulars on the show, which were the four, eight, go on a booze cruise. - Oh, very Boston. - And Donna slips and storm happens, and Donna's, they go on a three-hour booze cruise cruise. - Right. - And Donna slips and bangs her head, and she has this sort of combo, Wizard of Oz, Gilligan's Island moment, and what she dreams is the mosquitoes episode of Gilligan's Island with the band, the British Bank, and then you'd be amazed how easily the people from then to, you know, dropped into the characters on Gilligan's Island. - But that also goes to show, like, I imagine you grew up just absorbing so much Gilligan's Island and Brady Bunch and all those shows. And it goes to show that, you know, one of the things they talk about on this show a lot is, like, even people from completely different walks of life as adults that are very different, when we kind of peel back far enough, we all have the same shared experience of these shows. - Same TV. - Yeah, exactly. And everybody, like, you know, just locks into it. So those people are like, yeah, I know it, I get this exactly. We know exactly this role, yeah. - And they went for it. And Aaron's feeling was like, yeah, okay, and they went to Sherwood Island. - Sherwood Schwartz. - Yes. And he was apparently intending to do a Gilligan's Island feature at the time and then he wouldn't let them do it. The feature never happened at all. - 'Cause he had just done the Brady Bunch movie, which was actually really good, and it was a big hit. So, you know, it makes sense that he was, like, next on the agenda, Gilligan's Island. - They did it. - No, they never did it. - Well, I wish you'd let me do my things. I think it would've been really funny. But anyway, the producers of the show were like, well, we can't do that, but, you know, we like your gumption. - Right. - So, do you want to come in and write? And I'm writing for any serial show like that is the, as a guest writer, is the easiest thing ever because they have a story line, it's a season long story line. So, I don't have to go in there and go, oh my God, what am I gonna have Donna doing? I think, what Donna's doing is already written in stone. So, they give you an outline, it's pretty extensive, and you go in there and basically fill in dialogue. - Right, right. - Or, you know, in my case, I think it's a case a lot, is sometimes they have contradictory goals written in that you let us somehow twist. - Both in, yeah. - So, it wasn't like it was without its challenges, but it wasn't. - Of all the things for your first gig, it could've been a lot more difficult. - Yeah, yeah. - It was pretty easy. - And it was a show that you'd been on and it simply watched. - And I intimately knew every character's story. So, in fact, that was the bigger challenge for me was things like they weren't at the Jeopardy episode. - Yeah, yeah. - The Jeopardy. - In Halloween, Christmas, Jeopardy and cramps. Oh, cramps is Halloween. - That's Halloween one, yep. - So, all right, so the Jeopardy's, they're also the novelty of the season. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - They give you on purpose because they don't air that off because they're seasonal. - That's how you screw it up really bad. - No, they just don't get as much money. You don't get-- - Oh, gotcha. - You're a freelancer, 'cause you're a freelance writer. - And so, you get the seasonal ones. Okay, there's this fuckin' free money to me. So, the Jeopardy one, they were like, okay, well, we're gonna have it be Andrea, obviously. And Brandon, and I guess, Claire, they hit Claire. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And I said, well, why can't we have, not Brian, but it was Brian, David. David Silver, well, David's stupid. Like, though David's not stupid, he graduated in high school a year early. - Yeah. - Remember? - But he did it in a stupid way. - What they said was hip hop made him dumb. - Really? - Yeah. - Oh, no, hip hop made him dumb. Okay, I can't do that. You know, so that-- - Yeah, and once you're dumb, you can't get smart again. - Nah, no, he's done. And so, there's that kind of thing that was sort of funny. - Yeah. - And this was my episode, but next to you at one point, had a big mental breakdown because I didn't write this. - Right. - But the Agonies had been an only child. - Right. - And then, like, two seasons later, a brother showed up, it was like 14. - Right, right. Makes perfect sense. Makes perfect sense. It's like the age jump, like, we just had a baby, next season, he's 12. Doesn't exist. - I didn't have a certain mat log, and my character had a baby, and she gets murdered the next day. - Oh, happens all day. - In hot pants and, like, kitten heels. - Nice. - 'Cause that's what chicks do. - Yeah, absolutely. - They have me do the whole, like, getting off the hospital bed, like, all, like, tender, like, I have, like, a piziotomy stitches, like, I can't even move, the next day. - Yeah. - Leggings and heels. - Yeah. - Well, that's the insurance system. They kick your head off, get the heels. - American healthcare. - Yeah. It was a very subversive anti-American healthcare system. - For pro-American healthcare. - True as well. Yeah, we were so good, we got you in your hot pants. - It was a piziotomy, heeled in 12 hours. - Just right away. But that's why you needed the tight pants, 'cause it was kind of holding it off together. - Yeah, maybe. - Exactly. - Probably my uterus in. - Still, the cramps episode though is interesting to me, because, you know, as you had mentioned earlier, you're a fan of the baby drawing up. - Huge cramps. - So was that your doing, like, let's have the cramps episode? - No. - No. - 'Cause it's so weird. - And you wouldn't know what a fucking jaded cunt I am, or was, but they gave me that episode, and I was like, oh, the cramps, like, I mean, I mean, I can make cramps for us. - Yeah, oh, yeah. - Every time they came to Boston, I was like 10 times. My mother has photos of nude lux interior at the channel of this pants. - Yeah, yeah. - 'Cause this fucking penis is out. - Yeah. - And I was so jaded, I wrote it, and didn't ever go to the set. - Really? - I could have been there every minute of it, I wanted to be. - So you'd seen them live, but never, like, met them? - No, I wrote dialogue, plus! I wrote dialogue. - Wow. - And didn't go to the set. - 'Cause you're like, dush bag. - That's what a dush bag. - That's what a dush bag. That's what a fucking king douchebag I am. - But I don't think, I mean, when we were talking about earlier, too, like, when you're, you've come so far from Boston, like, could you imagine if 1984 you had talked to 1996 you at that time, and I'm like, what the hell are you doing? - Actually, I was a really cool, and you were cool in quotes. I was a very too cool kid, and I, because I was at these shows with my idols, like, I was, for me, being at a grand show, or a Gary Newman show, whatever, depending on the time, the year it was, I could've met all of them, and I knew organically, and apparently that all I could ever say is, I really love you, and then that's-- - It's embarrassing, and you're not gonna get anything out of it. - I never did it. - Which, I get that piece, but yeah, if you're writing their dialogue, it's almost like a different thing, but I could see nothing-- - No, I'm not a dush bag, and I can fully embrace that now, and I regret now that I didn't go there then. - At least don't always have that episode. Like, you could watch it, and go, I made it and say that. - I never watched it. - You've never seen it? - Nope. - That truthfully full disclosure, I think might be the only 9 or 2 episode I've seen all the way through. - Wow. - And I remember, actually, I left the show early at the wrap to go watch that episode, 'cause the cramps were on it. - Wow, I think that's a small world moment. - Because I was such a huge cramps fan. They're one of my favorite absolute all-time favorite fans, and it was so weird. Like, I didn't believe they were actually gonna be, I was like, "What, what, what?" - I had nothing to do with that. That was the universe, drawing-- - What a weird, certain deputy. - Diamond dust in my lap, and I'm spitting it, I'm poofing it and blowing it away. - That's what we do, that's what we do. - It's like a, just really an asshole. - So when you wrote that, you know, it seemed like it was kind of an organic way to show that you're on, but were you like, "Oh, you know what? "I think I'm just gonna do writing TV now." - No, I could have, and I wanted to be an actor, and I wanted to be specifically a film actor, about a TV actor. - Right, which is such a different thing, which is a different thing. - So if I then had to be one of the other. - Yeah. - Now it has to be both. - Right. - Now you can't get either, unless you have both. - Right. - Then it was very different. - They're sort of produced similarly now, though, too, I think, 'cause like a lot of the quality TV is essentially just long news. Like, they're shooting in the movies. - Do you have seen Black Mirror? - What is it, Black Mirror? - Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's great, Charlie, no, Chris Crooker. - Charlie Crooker? - Charlie Crooker. - Black Mirror? - Yeah. - My wife is a, he wrote, yeah, Charlie Crooker. He also did a show with this guy, Chris Morris, who is a British guy, who did this like, total punk rock sketch show, and it's a very, very subversive, and had a panel show called TV Wipe, that was just about how, like, TV news and all this stuff, it was totally fucked up. So when you did that show, it was such a perfect, fictional way to do that kind of thing. - What a great show. - Yeah. - Which I think is nice that the US seems to be adapting to British system of like limited series. - It's still the shows. - Who's still the shows, too? - Who's still the shows, too? - Who's called Robin's Nest. - Robin's Nest, yep. - And Home to Roost became you again with John Stamos. - Oh my gosh. - All in the family, and all those are all British shows. - I can't talk shit about American-owned families, especially since they got to have Carol O'Connor. - Oh yeah, 'cause you're in the heat of the night, right? - He plays his daughters, yeah. - What was that like, you see the first, like, well, no, I've heard one of them, but who's like the first person you watched going up that you worked with? - He was the most iconic person. - That must've been. - He personally did I ever worked with. - And I've heard he was very nice, though. - Unbelievably nice. - So it must've made it a little bit easier, but I'm just, you know, like I'm talking to Archie Bunker. - Oh no, fucking obnoxious, I'm really an asshole. Because I met him, I got the job, I had to do a Southern accent, I got the appointment for the audition, and they were like, oh, by the way, do a Southern accent, which I can't do. - So did you just Tennessee Williams did the job? - Yeah, completely winged, I was like an asshole. - Will shook. - Yeah, really bad accent. - And he gave me the job, but I had like, I have, you can see I have five ear holes, which at the time was scandalous, and I used to wear earrings, you know. And so I go, and I had this short blonde to know where it's at roots, and I go to work the first day, I meet Mr. O'Connor, I'm like, oh, Mr. O'Connor, and I say, did you go, so why do you do your hair like that? What's up with that? I go, why did I just look shit? I look shit, if I try to look soft, I look like shit. I have to go the other way. - Right. - The whole trailer, the police eye on things, everyone was waiting to find out what Mr. O'Connor. - 'Cause you're like sworn from all the leads, yeah. - Yes, yes. - And was he just like, cool. - Fuckin' loved me. It became like my godfather. - 'Cause everyone probably was on like eggshells and random. - Okay, so they didn't treat him like a real person. - Right. - And I did, but not, but almost a little bit out of arrogance. I really, I really suck, no, I'm all wrong, I do it. - I mean, I know about that a lot, literally. Horrible human beings don't agree to talk to me for no apparent reason at length about things. Well, they may, I don't know. (laughs) But I think those kind of guys appreciate that kind of thing because those-- - Is it being acted? - I didn't. - You never know. - Are there a word here, doesn't it? - Well, a lot of those people I think that came from his generation of acting were, a lot of them were approaching it as a job. So they, it was almost like blue collar acting. So they were almost like, yeah, we're just talking down the job site. - Well, I sort of responded to him as if he was Archie Bunker. - I mean, everyone probably did too, but we're like, didn't want to set him off. - Everyone was, I did a lot of that, I did a lot, I did four or five of them and the respect level for him was thick. - Yeah, yeah. - And like, cloying and unpleasant. - So everyone grew up with him? - So he has this like, paternal. - Apparently, he liked being treated like a peer. - Yeah. - That's what I did. I called him Carol. - And everyone else was Mr. O'Connor? - Or Mr, I think it was just Mr. - Mr. Patrick. - That's weird. - That's weird, like, outside of school, that's weird to me. 'Cause I'm not like, this is kind of like, - I am Carol. - Yeah, and this is fucking lying here, right? - What the fuck, Carol? But that's great though. Like, I think, and I could see how that would be refreshing for those people who are just used to having that. - Well, this is his credit for knowing that I wasn't being disrespectful. - Right, right. - That wasn't. - Right. You weren't trying to make yourself look bigger by bringing down the stuff. - I wasn't being, I'm not ignorant. - Yeah, you're just being you. - Swearing people a mistake, swearing great, different stuff. - I do have a larger vocabulary than that. - Yeah. - I just like the swear ones most. - It's appropriate to have them, that's why we have swear words. They exist for a perfectly good reason. - I don't think it's any bad word. I don't believe in, I think you should say fucking cunt on TV. - It's intentional, there's no bad words. - It's amusing to me how I lived in the UK for a while and that, you know, they have that approach. Like, you can say, you know, everyone on TV. - You should. - And the things they cut out are violent instead of sex. - That's right. - So. - I actually applaud that too. - Makes sense, you know what I mean? But how we just pretend that the words don't exist here on television is really weird to me. 'Cause it's like everybody knows. - You know, for the first time ever, if my mother didn't lie to me, for the first time ever, the Golden Globes did not give a single network television show a word. - Yes, yeah, yeah, which is kind of. - That's awesome. - Yeah. - Which means network television has to get rid of that old stand and this fucking maze code. - Yeah. - You know? - And actually reflect what the world looks like. - Yeah, there can still be a network on cable that has family-friendly stuff. - Yeah, absolutely. - But network television is not going to survive. - I also think you can have family-friendly stuff where people say fucking shit. Like, people actually say your family sometimes. - Yeah, but absolutely do. - I know, in fact, the ones that are the most conservative probably have the foulest realities, yeah. - I remember there was this woman on TV who was like a crusader against swear words, and she goes, like, I don't say, oh my God. I say, oh my Buddha. And I'm like, first of all-- - That's the same. - That's the same thing. - Something else is gone. - That someone else got, so it's actually more offensive because now you're minimizing it. - Yeah, he's discredited. - Yeah. - And she was like, I don't know. - Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my Buddha. - Oh my Buddha. - Oh my Buddha. - Oh my God. - He's ridiculous. - He's like, he's, you know, he's not even a real deity, so it doesn't matter. But it's like, that's what you're trying to combat with people who-- - Yeah. - The way they look at the world, which is crazy. But I think that, yeah, we're having such a narrow, casted golden age of things where people can find exactly what they want to see, that the market has to respond because they won't survive. - Hey, that first episode of "Black Mirror." - Yeah. - Oh, yeah. - Absolutely. Absolutely. - Wow. - I'm so glad they went through it. - Yeah, I mean, and I hope that that continues to influence like U.S. television, which it sounds like, in the world of someone smaller now, too, where we can sort of immediately see a UK show, which you could put in. I mean, it was, we had PBS so you could watch "Money Python." MTV showed the young ones sometimes. - Oh, I recorded every one of those that I had before. I did it. - Oh, I wore 'em out. - Yeah. - And it was-- - I quote that thing this day. - It's one of my favorite shows of all time, which is why I was talking to an earlier that I'd done an episode with the dam, and it was maybe the first one of these I've done where I was like, completely stuck struck. Because I'm a huge fan of them anyway, but I remember when I saw them on the young ones in '85, that's when I discovered the thing that I like. Like, I was like, oh, oh, this is what I like. I didn't know, but I like this thing. And it was just like life-changing. And it's easier for people to do that now, I think. But at the same time, it's harder to stumble on things 'cause people are kind of only watching things they already like. - Well, it's not in this very little that's cool anymore 'cause it's global overnight, so there's no niche stuff. - Things can't build an audience over time. - No guitar player can have his own way of playing the guitar because instantly everyone sees it, it's copying. Like, how did that, like, super, like, what do they call that monkey, eight slung, and the people they're faced on by, they're like ankles? Like, some, who did that first? They would've been doing that for 10 years before it caught anyone else's confidence. - And how did you just out of ignorance, like, this is how you play, right? - Maybe, or maybe it's a system of, who knows? There's comfortable that way, they're back hurts when they're like, oh. - Well, how it was ever developed, who knows, but that person would have to go on tour for years and years and years for enough people to see it or become a thing. - Right. - But now it's a thing you've overnighted. - Which is why I think we have, like, a complete lack of organic sort of music scenes these days, 'cause no one's doing stuff in a vacuum where it can develop its own sort of flavor taste. - You have a great show, it's been recorded, you put it on Facebook, you put it on YouTube, and this is-- - Yep, everybody sees it instantly, and then it's gone. - Yeah, it's disposable. - Which is partly, I mean, not to talk too much about music, 'cause technically it's TV play like this, but that's why, to me, I haven't really seen anything exciting in music in my decades, and it's all just, like, recombinations of, it's like post-apocalyptic music where they're like-- - Everything's a recombination, so you're not so old that you're young, so you've never seen something totally original, neither have I. There's still exciting things, I thought Amy Winehouse was really exciting. - Yeah, yeah. - Really exciting, and she's exponentially more exciting when you watch a show like The Voice or something, and you're near something, you can technically sing, do an Amy Winehouse song, it's like, oh my god. - It's missing that thing, though. - It's nothing. - Yeah. - It's nothing, even Madonna, who, whatever you think of Madonna, watch somebody else do a Madonna song, and it sucks. - Yeah, yeah, it's the person, and it's like, when people discredit someone who doesn't write songs, which performs them like Elvis is the example that I always use, probably 'cause I'm gonna be in a doubles pad but-- - It's like a mother fucker. - You could sing like a mother fucker, and also could arrange songs and interpret these songs. When you hear like the demo of the guy that wrote it, you're like, that song's okay. And then you hear the elders, you're like, oh no, he made that an actual song. - Yeah, have you heard Willie Nelson's demo of Crazy? - Yes, yes. - Right there, right there. - Yeah, it's like, you would hear that song and just be like, no, okay, wow. - Yeah, or any of the huge songs that you did, or like the Hoyt accident songs that he wrote with the dad and gremlins, he wrote a bunch of songs. - Oh, I know that. - And you're just like, yeah, okay, but then you hear him doing the lyrics. - Oh no, that's what he's bringing. - And that was apparently really, and like, really-- - Yeah, there's, I don't know if you've ever seen the documentary, that's the way it is, which is about Elvis going on tour after he basically does the '68 combat special. And it's a cool documentary, but he also does, there's footage of him rehearsing the band and arranging the songs. And they'll do it, they'll be like, no, no, no. All right, stop, you do this, you do this part, you do this part, you do this. And then they'll do it again, and you're like, oh my god. - Country, country fight hit. - Oh yeah, yeah, it needs to be done. - The thing, music, idiot, Savannah. - Yeah, and I think it's harder to get people like that now, or this lesson. - No, there's, the people are out there. It's, it's, it's the, I think all, all art, it has to appeal to such a broad audience now. They used to be, you can have a band, like if you're CCR or whatever, I don't know, CCR is actual history is, but in fact then, you can put four albums out and label it, still put your fifth album out, leave the first four sock to know about them. You got a fifth album. - Or TV show, I mean Cheers, was, would have been canceled after four episodes now, because of ratings, and they let it run for a season and a half, with no one watching. - I don't know, they were canceled, but Boston was a fledgling network, and they didn't have any replacement shows. They didn't shoot enough, and they had to let it stay. - Right, and they also did a really smart thing, which I don't know if it was really intentional, they're just out of like, we don't know what we're doing desperation almost, with the summer season. - That was a purpose. - Which was, you think Aaron's telling you, you know what he's doing? - That's true, that's true. - Aaron's telling is in the same category for me as Carol Potter, they're both unbelievably generous to me, and they came from that old school world, and they both underestimated, Carol less than Aaron. - Right, 'cause he's sort of written off sometimes, and it's like a, like a, - She's factored. - Yeah, like a popcorn thing, yeah. - But, here's my thing I've said it before about Aaron. Aaron, you know, love boat, a lot of shows that maybe don't have a whole lot of gravitas, but not everybody wants gravitas. - Yeah, I mean, it's an entertainer. - And his thing was, he wasn't like, oh fuck everyone's stupid, I'll make a dumb show. - Right. - He thought he was, he liked what he was making, and there was a sincerity behind what he did. He, when I was on Under 2-1-0, he'd be in touch with everyone's lip color, and their hair, and their clothes, and he watched every episode, noted things, and was really invested in making a quality product. And anyone that watched those shows, after any of these shows, it did really well. There's a lot of fake Under 2-1-0s at all, and none of them stuck. - No, and these all had rabid fan bases that really latched on for probably those reasons. - He did a sincerity. - Yeah. - He was not dumbing, he wasn't pandering, or insulting people, so I think this is great. I think this is great. So when you can feel it as a, you can certainly feel it as a human being when you watch the show go, I can make that fucking show, watch where you do it. - Right, and people watching go, that sucks. - It's just the superficial things they latch onto, and they don't care what works. - Oh, I can put eight pretty kids together and give them some high school problems. - Someone on zon drugs, like whatever it is, yeah. - And people don't take it. - I guess I would say he's not McDonald's, he's in an outburger. - Okay. - On the surface, people go, these are fries. - Even though he's in an outburger, the fries suck. - That's true, their fries are really bad, but they're sincerely mixed. - They're sincerely mixed. - And it's like a quality version of a thing that if someone just looked at them superficially, would think they were the same. - Yeah. - And 'cause you also did a episode, I think of the revival of Fantasy Island. - I did. Who wouldn't work with Malcolm McDowell, come on. - Yes. - Yeah, it was MetChomic and Malcolm McDowell. I think she was in like the tattoo role, which was really weird. - No, she wasn't, she was in the show. - I thought she was as a sister or something. - No, you had one, it was like an Italian guy from Brooklyn or something. - Was this tattoo? - It was not a short person. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - You couldn't do it anyway, that would just be extra weird. - But, you know, it was just like a Goomba. - Yeah. - I think it was a guy. - Like a piece of pasta for a guy. - Hey, welcome to Fantasy Island. - I'm not mistaken, I think it was them. - Who can I get you? - Yeah. - So that was a, do you watch the original one? You were growing up, I imagine everybody was. - I'm sure I saw one or two, I didn't watch a lot of TV. - Really, look as your parents are artists, you go on to shows, you probably have a real life. - And I was in Boston Latin, they had fucking had schoolwork, they had a real job, I had a job that I worked at Cleveland Circle for like, all of my high school years. - They used to be a Greek restaurant, I didn't work at a restaurant. There's a Greek restaurant, the Aegean fair, Aegean fair, and the next door, a couple of doors down with a photo patio. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - I worked at photo patio. - Okay, it was like a photo map. - Yeah, but it wasn't a kiosk, it was an actual store work. - Right, right. Yeah, so you're not watching this stuff, which is, which is interesting, then to go on and be honored, and probably also kind of good. - I didn't respect it though, I was, and that's why I was sort of flippant about all of it, because it wasn't what I wanted to do. I didn't, I didn't have a great passion to be an actor, I didn't have a great, I never wanted to be famous. I wanted to be in movies that I, I wanted to be Philip Seymour Hoffman. - Right, right, right. You wanted to be in good quality movies. - I wanted to be, he didn't exist then. - Right. - But, that never happened. - Where'd you saw him you go? Oh, that's what I wanted to be. - I want that life, I want to be a respected actor that everyone, other actors want to work with you. Other directors want to direct you, and then, and you have a little bit, you're big enough, you're famous enough that you can get some big paycheck movies that pay for things so that you can then take a smaller, even no money. - You make a living and can do things you want to do, but you're not. - No, we're trying to change your. - Yeah, exactly. And, do you, what was the first thing people recognized you from, was the matter to you? Do people like come up to you? - Yeah, definitely. - And, and that fan base, I imagine, was kind of a shock of like... - I was completely, it was my own. No one ever recognized me from child's life. Ever. - Yeah. - They do, now, but never, I didn't get recognized in the street ever. And, until we know, it was a phenomenon, and I was in the cover of magazines. - Yeah, like, team magazines. - Yeah, I remember the first time I ever saw myself in cover of magazines, and I thought it was the chick from Rucksett, and it's like, oh, I hate that bit. - Must have been Rucksett. - We actually, side note, we saw them at Avalon, with the new Avalon to house of glue. It was a couple, like, a year ago, 'cause someone offered us tickets. There was nobody there, we felt so bad for them, 'cause they were such a huge arena rock band. - They, I always hated them. And I always hated her, I don't even know why. But, it literally saw my, I'm a little bit treated, but whatever part of me is not Irish, a little bit that isn't, is Swedish. - Maybe you're self-hating too. - It is, a self-hating Irish person, too. The Irish are the king of something. - So you saw yourself on a magazine covering your, like, fucking Rucksett. - That bitch from Rucksett can suck my dick, yeah. - When did you realize it was you? - I was like, I fucking did it. Oh my God, it's me, yeah. - Did you buy it? - Of course I did. - Yeah. Of course I did. - Did the person at the store give you, like, a, - No. - 'Cause it's out here, people probably do that all the time. - I don't think I, I wasn't famous. So, I've never actually been famous, so. - But at that time, I would imagine just given the rabid fan base of that show, and you probably would've been somewhat mobbed sometimes if people did, you actually got it. - I actually, for years, I couldn't go to the mall. - Yeah. - And Jason and I, we had a thing with it. - Oh yeah, especially if you were Jason. - I need you to not recognize more than Jason, only because my look was so specific. His, he's a very beautiful guy, but I had that white hair, and it was very. - Distinctive, yeah. - Identifying. - Yeah. - And there was actually one or two occasions where somebody asked Jason if I was the girlfriend manager. - Like, hey guy, I don't know. - Yeah. - Is that the group? - Dude. - Is that the chip from the attitude? - Do you know who you're talking to? - They did, that happened like once or twice. - What did he say, yes? - What? - He said yes, but a million times, I got asked. It was him. - Yeah, right. - So it was a fair play, fair play. - It was just really a novelty that somebody asked him. - Yeah. Oh, that's hilarious. - But yeah, so I, no going to the mall, no going cold, like no regular lifestyle. - Which is great. Like that's like being the boy in the plastic bubble a little bit. - Yeah, it is. - Which is, you guys were like, let's go to the movies and they're like, oh, we can't. - No, we can't. We went to Ireland. And I, my first trip out with Jason, he's like, where should we go for Christmas break? I go, I've always wanted to go to Ireland because I'm from Boston. That's your job. - Yeah, that's a home country. - You have to, you gotta go back to some other land. So I was like, we have to go to fucking Ireland. And we did, and I planned the thing, and there's all these amazing castles all over Ireland at our hotels now, and it was a ridiculous thing. You have five-star incredible land in Shannon, stay in a dare manner, and then drive down through Crown Pork, and then up to Dub, we did Christmas in Waterford. - So you're really doing it. - You're doing it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Did all of 'em in Southern Ireland. Didn't do the North, because I was always all about afraid of the troubles. - Yeah, exactly. - And it just kind of funny. But we couldn't go out, think of, we were in this really gigantic, estate mansion castle dings that had a whole trip's work of stuff to do. We had to learn to ski-shoe, which I learned from a shoot-skiing in Ireland. - Oh, nice. - In the back horse's in Ireland. And then it looked really lotter drinking in Ireland. - Well, yeah. - And the Christmas in Waterford, I was, we had made a deal, not to buy to the Christmas presents. - Right, right. - The trip was the present to each other. But you know what, fuck it. It's like Christmas Eve. It's going to Waterford, the boat off the island with the castle, it's into the town of Waterford. - I don't care what, I don't know if we can go to any pubs, nothing, you know. - Right. - Like fuck everybody. I mean, let's just ignore them, and go in there, and like have, - Yeah. - And we went into a sweater store, and within 15 minutes, there was like 30 people in line with you. It was like the Beatles. It was like, it was like they had been a contest in Ireland, the first person that squats Jason Priestley, gets a million dollars. He's like, "Put your toe out of the door." Ah! - Sweater shopping, which is not, because even then you probably thought, we're safe, we're in a different country. It's so fun. - It was brutal. - It was such a huge international thing. - It was brutal. - 'Cause you did a pay watch as well, which was probably the other show that had that international place. - But that was way before that. That was it was a network show, and it's 4,000,000. - Right, 4,000 canceled, and then we decided. - Yeah. - Yes, when the person got eaten by the shark. - Parker Stevenson was on it. - Billy Worlock was on it. - Billy Worlock was on it. - I had to have it. Who's my love? - Yes, yeah. - Whose dad was his stunt man? - On child's way too. - Yes. - Yes. - Big Worlock. - Yes, Dick Worlock, who was also in Halloween. He was Michael Myers. - Yeah, I know. I ran into Dick at a horror convention. - Oh, have you, have you done a lot? - I have, not a lot, a few. I would do them every day of my life. I think they're fucking great. I'm a huge fan. I don't do well at them. - Really? - I think it's kind of weird, but I don't do well at them. - Do you like, are you a horror movie fan? - No. - 'Cause some people go, 'cause they're like, 'cause I get to see all the other people that I-- - I know, but I know, but there's such a horror. - Yeah, no. It's one more pop culture thing. - Yeah, and I, there I do watch some horror, and there are movies I like, and I'm a fan of actors. I'm not different from anywhere else. I still get star shirts, and I see, oh my god, this is that girl from that thing, you know? - Right, right, right. - And there's actually I've worked with it. I haven't seen it in a long time. - Yeah, so it's nice to see this, you know? - Really worth the first winner of American gladiators. You won the first season of American gladiators. - Really? - Yeah, 'cause he's an lost boy, it's the same year. - I am. - Yeah. - Did he do well with the pucil stick? - He was very good with the pucil stick, but his forte was the eliminator. He could dodge a tennis ball like nobody's business, so yeah, I really learned. - He's quick on his feet. - Quick on his feet. - I know that. - He showed Zach what for us. - Good to know. - Completely creamed Malibu. (laughing) - It's awesome. - It's things now, and you're gonna know these people, what are you watching on TV now? Like obviously you're watching Black Mirror, but other shows-- - Six episodes of that, that came and went in a weekend. - Yeah. - I watch American Horror Story, which always ends up being disappointing by the other season. They always feed on themselves and becomes just a train wreck. This season was my most exciting. I'm all about the period, and I like the freak element, and I was disappointing from the first episode. This is the worst season by a lot. By a lot. And what's his name? From the shield, Chickless. - Michael Chickless? - Who's a bot? - From Lowell, I think they are. - Is it Lowell? I think it's Italian means an A. - Oh, like Ainsbury or something. It was good. - Not Ainsbury. - It's an A, not that far. I know, I get it wrong. But he's definitely a message to this guy, and I've met him a bunch socially. He's unbelievably nice, and a huge fan of this. He's one of the guys that I would meet at a party with Jason, and the next time I saw him without Jason, he'd still know who I was. - Right, with shocks to him, people. I always get to be like, "Why did you remember me? "And there's no reason?" - I was that girl that Jason's with, and someone's like, "Oh my God, Christine!" I'm like, "Ooh!" So I have a bit of Michael Chickless, I worship. And the fucking show is just got off on the show. - The Shield? - No, American Heart Show. - Oh, American Heart Show. - I watch, I had to say, I really like modern family. - Everyone loves that, I've still not watched it, and everybody loves it. - It's so sentimental. It's, and sentimental is really hard to do right. - Yeah. - It doesn't, it's really cute. I really, and I love Ed, what's his face from me? - Ed O'Neill? - Yes. - Yeah. - Um, I, I watch like big bulls and gorillas. - Okay, so you watch a lot of the reality stuff? - No, no, no, just that one. People's and gorillas. That was something I watched all of Mad Men, and I watched all of the girl, I watched girls. Girls, I have very, I have a schizophrenic feeling about those girls, but I watch them, I watch them all. - Yeah. - My book is kind of like girls, like 15 years ahead. - Right, right, right. - Um, what else do I watch? - I don't know, I don't know, I don't watch TV, because maybe I have a program film festival, so I always look like for like five of them. So I'm doing that, almost. - Yeah, yeah. - There are a lot of TV shows that I watch, but I can't, I can't think of anything on hand. - Do you ever wanna, or are there any shows you watch that you've got, I wanna write one of these. - No. - No, it's, that, it's, congrats on you, yeah. - I can't, I, I have no resume anymore, and when I work on a 2-1-0 with a 4-act thing, it's totally different. - I'm actually doing, I'm working for reality TV now. I mean, a story producing, which is editing and writing for a show called Best of the Bar's in America. - Oh, yeah. - You're the best player network? - Yeah. - Am I a friend of mine who's, is that G. Larsen? - Yes! You know G. Larsen. - He's from Stoneman. - Yes, I know. - Yeah, I know, yeah, yeah. - Tell him I work on this fucking show. - I will, yeah. - It was really funny, is Sean, Pat. - Oh, yeah, Sean Pat. - They did a whole Speakeasy thing, and everybody woke up to his Speakeasy, he'd say, do I have to exchange an egg? - It was a 902 and 0 reference. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - When I had that bar, the after hours, though, it took everyone two, and then egg it. And I'm like, how can Sean just reference 902 and 0? He has no idea. - He has no idea, and I'm working on this thing. - I thought they, I went, they shot at large stargot, which is a, it was easy here. I went, didn't need to fill the bar up, and I went. I literally bumped into Sean, and I had been editing his face for like two months already, so I was like, oh! - You know me? - I did that. - I did that. - I was like, oh, sorry, Daryl. - I moved that. I was like, he has no idea where I go. - He has no idea where I go. - I know, yeah. - What a weird, small world, though. - Yeah. - Well, thank you so much for sitting down and talking to me. - Not at all. - It's a fantastic experience. - Not at all. - Have fun downtown. - Nice show. (upbeat music) - And then we go, that was Christina Lee, still one and only. You have seen her in many, many things. The Triple Dean on Beverly Hills 902 and 0, really enjoyed talking to her. She couldn't have been nicer, really, really great. And it was nice to hang out at her local watering hole. I enjoyed that. I hadn't really hung out in sort of pubs since I lived in England, but it had that kind of feel to it. So that was a lot of fun. I think you probably enjoyed it if you got this far. Again, I will put all the links to her social media. Definitely buy her book. She also has a great food blog that I will link from tvguidenscounselor.com. And we will see you next week with an all new episode of TV Guidens Counselor. So be sure you tune in on Wednesday and be sure to subscribe because you never know one will have special episodes, not on Wednesdays. And if you like the show, please rate it, review it on iTunes. It's a huge help. It helps get the word out about the show. And we'll see you again next week for an all new TV guidance counselor. (upbeat music) - That big remote set can suck my dude. Okay, rain man.
