TV Guidance Counselor
TV Guidance Counselor Episode 45: Tim Vargulish
- Wait, you have a TV? - No, I just like to read the TV guide. Read the TV guide, you don't need a TV. (rock music) - Hello, and welcome to TV Guidance Counselor, everybody. It is Wednesday, and as always, that means it's a brand new episode of TV Guidance Counselor. I am Ken Reed, your TV Guidance Counselor, and my guest this week is comedian, writer, Tim Vargulish. Tim's a weird dude, I'll tell you that right now, which makes for a good conversation. I love this kid. I've known Tim for, geez, I don't know, eight years since he started doing stand-up comedy on a Rhode Island, so the New England comedy scene just produces some pretty stellar people. He lives in LA now, he is the writer and occasional artist of the Goatman comic book, and is still doing some comedy. Definitely see him if you have a chance or pick up a copy of Goatman. I'll put all the links to all that on the TV Guidance Counselor webpage. As always, I encourage you to email me at kennedykeren.com if you have any questions, which you will at the end of this episode. So, please listen and enjoy this week's episode of TV Guidance Counselor with my guest, Tim Vargulish. (rock music) ♪ She is a TV silvish ♪ ♪ She is a TV silvish ♪ ♪ She is a TV silvish ♪ ♪ She is a TV silvish ♪ ♪ And you know when it comes to TV♪ - Mr. Tim Vargulish. - Hello. - Stifling laughter, it looks like. Doin' my announcer voice, you're just laughin' at me. It is a little silly. - I just, I don't know, I just, whenever I record something like this, I tend to laugh, I apologize. - Oh, that's fine. - I mean, this is very serious, so you're gonna ruin it for the academics that listen to the show for hard facts. So normally, this is the point in the show when I welcome people to my home, but we are not in my home. We're in a friend's home who has allowed me to utilize his home. He said it was okay if I had people over to record the podcast, so they're not gonna bust in and kick us out like a story Tim told me earlier about his first girlfriend's dad discovering them on couches after he got home from second shift. But we are on the West Coast. We were in Malibu, a lovely Malibu, and I had just stocked up on Victoria's kitchen, almond water, and have visited the shooting locations of Back to the Beach this morning, and now Tim is here, and we're recording this podcast. So how are you? - Oh, I'm fine, thank you, it's been a lovely day so far. I'm looking excited for this. - Yeah, you haven't really been to Malibu before. - No, not really, I've heard of it. - Well, yeah, this Malibu Barbie, which is huge. She's very popular, and I'm sure you had maybe one of those growing up. - No. - No, 'cause you have all brothers. - Yes, yes. - So there was no Barbies in the house. - No. - Did you ever watch the Barbie, anything? It was like a Barbie cartoon for a while. - Yeah, no, I never, never got into those. - That's good. - I love the action figures, just no Barbies. - They're the same. I will admit I was into Jim. - Okay. - And I would purchase Jim dolls for myself as a kid. - My brother was really, really like the show. I don't think he had any toys, but yeah. - The show was great. I would buy a Jim soundtrack tomorrow, if it came out. I'd buy it today, if I could right now. So you picked a TV guide. So I should mention this too, that Tim was nice enough to agree to, which was sort of like a Faustian bargain here. When I said, "Tim, I'm coming out to California, "I've seen some of you do some shows," but really to record some podcast during the day and get all into water and go to shooting locations of things and not be at my job for a couple of weeks. But I said, "Tim, can I mail you out some TV guides?" And Tim said, "Yeah, of course, why not?" And then I sent out a ridiculous amount. - At least 300, is that? - It was probably at least 300, yeah. And I felt so bad when I drove from the airport to your apartment to get them in the trunk of this rental car. And I was like, "This is taking up most of your apartment. "This is a lot of TV guides." So thank you for putting up with that. - Oh no, it was actually fun getting them and it's nice to come home and have mail. - Yeah, that's a sad thing, isn't it? That's one of the reasons I buy so many things. I just like coming home to have mail. - Yeah, I actually do that like whenever I order stuff, or like a lot of books and movies, and I get so excited when they come in, but I never watch or read them right away. - You just want the thrill, do you unwrap them right away so you don't have like wrapped things? - Yeah, yeah. - So you at least do that. But I do that too, 'cause it looks really bad if you have like 80 DVDs all wrapped, even if you haven't watched them, right at least unwrap them. So you picked a TV guide, we stood out on the Pacific Coast Highway and went through the trunk of this rental car, and we looked through TV guides, and what we came up with was October 22nd to the 28th, 1994, October Halloween, Halloween week 1994, with a very spooky Suzanne Summers on the cover, and a horrifically terrifying photo of Jay Leno, who claims will be number one again. So this was kind of right after he took over the tonight show, saying we're calling his shot. We're gonna be number one, he said. - Yeah, you know he was right. - Yeah. - So I assume you picked this because of the Halloween content. - Yeah, I'm a big fan of Halloween, as are you, so that got me a little excited. I guess I'd probably also say I'm a little bit of a Suzanne Summers fan. - Really, did you enjoy it step by step? - I did, yeah. I don't know how much I'd like it now, but I did like it growing. - Was that the only thing you liked her, and not she's the sheriff or things company? - I've never seen much of three's company, I've never heard of she's the sheriff, and that sounds good. - Oh, she's the sheriff. - Yeah, it was a syndicated show she was on after three's company, so it was late 80s, and here's the plot, he's not gonna surprise you, she was the sheriff of a small town, and that was it, it was a sitcom. - Was there like a lot of people that would always be in disbelief, like they'd be like, "She's the sheriff." - Exactly, except you're telling, I wanna speak to the sheriff, she's the sheriff, and it was mostly that all the time, that was pretty much the whole show. I remember when I used to work at a local CBS affiliate, in Boston, one of my jobs was in college, was to go to the post office every morning and pick up the mail, and not 300 TV God's worth of mail, but all the mail we would get, which would mostly be complaint letters from crazy people. And so I'd actually have to go into the post office, I had a special, it wasn't really a badge, it was like a pass where I could just walk into the back of the post office and just pick up this mail and carry it out, and so one day, and often I would come in on the middle of conversations between postal workers, and one day this guy, I came in on the conversation, he goes, "Sues in, summer!" And he was making the big breast hand gesture, everyone knows what I'm doing, it's audio, but you know what the big breast hand gesture is, and then this guy goes, "No, no, her legs, her legs, "she's the thymaster, the thymaster!" And then the other guy goes, "No, she's got breast cancer." That's what he was doing, so he was, I was like, "What kind of world do we live in, "where the big boob in the gesture is now, "the hand gesture for breast cancer?" That's very strange, so I can't think of Susan Summers as I'm thinking of that. - Also, that's not usually how you bring up someone who has breast cancer, you don't go like, "Hey, yeah, she's got breast cancer!" Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, yeah, well that's apparently how postal workers do it. - Is there a hand gesture for legs too? - I always see people doing like, Tim's doing sort of a corkscrew motion, and it looks like you're doing like a fresh pepper. I don't know if the fresh pepper or hand motion is the legs hand gesture. Maybe we could come up with a legs hand gesture. I think when people do legs, they usually just end up rubbing their own thighs. That's usually what I see, legs, yeah, but they don't do that for breasts, they're not like boos and start rubbing themselves, unless I've been doing it wrong. That's why I never got into construction. So, let's jump right in, let's go Saturday night, eight o'clock, what'd you go with? I would have started watching Problem Child 2. - Did you see the original Problem Child in the theater? - Not in the theater, no. - And you enjoyed it though, you watched it on TV a lot? - I don't know why, I can't tell you how it started, but for some reason the Problem Child movies were really big with my family. - Really, you'd watch them as a family. - I don't know if my parents watched it, but all of my brothers loved it. - Did they watch the cartoon, do you remember the cartoon? - I do remember the cartoon, I don't remember much details about it. - It was a USA Network original cartoon, and it was one of their first original productions from the USA Cartoon Express. And the reason they did it was 'cause USA Network used to air the Problem Child movies incessantly and got huge ratings on them. And the only original cast member from the movies who did a voice on the cartoon, Gilbert Godfrey. (laughs) - Yeah. - It was also on the Look Who's Talking movies, Gilbert Godfrey. - Is he the only person who's done all three movies 'cause they had that made-for-TV movie? - Yes, with the new Problem Child movie. - Yeah. - I believe he is the only person who's done all three. I saw the original in the theater and I kind of liked it, and I wasn't that into the second one. - I, yeah, I don't know what it was about him. Maybe the thing was like the over-the-topness, like he was a pretty bad kid. - Oh yeah, he's a terrible kid. - Like some of the stuff like he did would almost kill people. - Yeah, and he was playing by Michael Oliver, who I don't think did anything but the Problem Child movies. - Not that I see him. - Not anything else. There was just sort of a big TV cast here. Michael Richards is the first one. - Oh yeah. - And then of course John Ritter and his real-life wife, Amy Yazbek, were involved. - Oh, they were married? - Yes, they were. - Oh, wow. - And this one only gets one star. - Yeah, that's, I don't agree with that. - Devilish Little Junior Healy goes to extremes to keep his dad from remarrying. - Oh yeah. - One star. And this is the first time I've ever seen them do that's on a movie. It says Repeat. - Yeah. - Which is very unusual for a movie. They usually don't mention if the movie is a repeat or not. - I don't know if I wanna watch that 'cause it's Saturday night, I'm 14 and 94. I probably would have gone with cops. This episode is LAPD officer Steven Devorian who helps search a dwelling for a prowler and a suspect is found in Deputy Scott Anger. That's his name, Scott Deputy Scott Anger responds to a domestic violence call. Well, I wanna write a sitcom about the Deputy Scott Anger called like Sergeant Anger or something. - That'd be pretty good. - Anger and charge. - Yeah. So you're watching the whole of Problem Child 2 or just the beginning of it? - Just the beginning of it. 'Cause then I couldn't find much else at eight that I would have wanted. - Well, if I were Mr. So The Dark was on, a fantastic movie and seasonally appropriate. - Wait, is that the one where she like moves to a small town and that is a good movie? - That's a really great movie. Yeah, written by her and John Paragon who was a ground link. - Oh, wow. - You also passed up Baywatch. Was that a show you ever watched? - No, I never watched it. - This episode, Tim has a dune buggy race across the Mexican border. Which is pretty exciting. So you had two brothers and two parents as most people do and you had one TV in the house? - I mean, eventually we had more but for a while I think there's only one. We had like a main one in the living room and my brothers might have had their own TVs. I'm not sure how soon everyone kind of got their own. - So I think that it, do you think that you were forced to learn, compromise and negotiating skills as a child by having to all agree to watch something on TV? Or was someone just like, my word is law? - Yeah, I never really got to argue, I feel like. - You just had to watch with a. - Pretty much, yeah. But luckily, like I kind of gravitated towards the taste of my brothers. - I think most people do that. I mean, I'm the oldest sibling so I didn't really experience that but I think that's how it's supposed to work. - Yeah, yeah, I think so. - And they love problem child, so you love problem. - Yeah, we still quoted to this day. - Do you really? What's your favorite problem child quote? - Well, a lot of the quotes come from the second one but a lot of times like, you know, like me and my brothers will just be like, that's my pal Trixie or it's blue cheese or something like that. - Have you ever done those to someone who isn't your brothers and they're like, what the hell are you talking about? - Oh yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah, mostly girlfriends who don't get it. - Short-lived girlfriends after that. - They just asked me about blue cheese. I am out of here, out of here. So 8.30 what'd you go with? - I went with Adventures of Pete and Pete. - Fantastic show. This is when it started airing on SNCC in 1994. You passed up something wilder which is the Gene Wilder sitcom that was very short-lived. This was the week that they aired the episode called Halloweenies which is maybe my favorite Pete and Pete episode. - The pumpkin smash. - Yes, the pumpkin smashers. - Oh, it's great. - It is excellent. That is a fantastic episode. That's the episode that I show people if they've never seen Pete and Pete. That's usually the one that I'll show them to get them out. And then did you watch that, like, love that show as much as I did? - Oh yeah, yeah. - That's huge on it. - Yeah. - Maybe not as much as you but I, yeah, it was big for me. - That show just, it captures, there's a certain type of person who likes that show. - Yeah. - And I found that many of them I know now as comedians. - I think there were kids that I grew up with who watched that and thought it was stupid. I don't know if you encountered that at all. - I'll have a few, I think. - And that was like a good litmus test to be like, you are someone I will never talk to. Yeah, great show. Nine o'clock, what'd you go with? - Buh-buh-buh, we're still on Saturday, right? - Yes, Saturday night. - I would have started watching America's Most Wanted. - Did that terrify you? Did you usually watch that? - Um, it was not something I would watch, like, regularly, but it was kind of like my go-to around. I think it was always like kind of around this time. I would not watch full episodes, but when I needed to fill in some time and it was on. - Just flew through, really? - Yeah. - 'Cause you're a little bit obsessed with serial killer and all that kind of stuff, like a real weird one. - Oh yeah, I love that stuff, yeah. - What do you like about that? - Um, I don't know, it's just like interesting 'cause I'm just a very timid person. Like I've never been in a fight in my life. - Right. - I've never killed anything. - Oh, these are good things, Tim. - So you feel like you missed out? - No, you don't understand the mindset, so you're-- - Yeah, like I'm interested, like, what would make someone do that, you know? - Yeah, yeah. It's probably, you know what it probably was? - Was that? - Problem child, too. (laughs) - Well, there was a little bit of escapism there. - Well, the bow tie killer is in problem child. There's a serial killer in the problem child movie, so that might've been the root of it. - Yeah. - Also, please don't take a girl on a date to the Museum of Death, Tim. Tim goes to the Museum of Death here in Los Angeles, frequently, just on your own. - Yeah. - That's, are there other dudes in there on their own, too, that are just kind of, you look at each other, and you just know. - Gotta give a little nod. - Yeah, that's-- - Let's see if you can not go there for, like, six months. - I'll try, but-- - Just try. Did you ever see anyone you thought you knew on America's most mine? - No, never. That's good. - I don't hang out with those kind of people. - Well, you are from Rhode Island originally, and Rhode Island, I don't know if they ever produced serial killer. - No, the, I remember probably, like, one of the biggest scandals I remember growing up was, there's this guy that would hang out at the end of Ailes and Grocery Stores. - Okay. - And he'd wait for women to walk by that were wearing, like, sandals or open-toed shoes, and then he would lick their toes. - So he just dropped to the ground and lick 'em. - Yeah, like, you'd just be waiting, and then if one walked by. - That's pretty odd. - And I remember, like-- - And they couldn't catch 'em? - No, not for a while, 'cause, like, I remember when they finally did catch 'em. Did they have a name for 'em in the media? - I always refer to 'em as the toe-licker, but I don't know if I just made that up in my head. - In Rhode Island, do people call 'em the toe-licker? (laughing) - And they might've-- - And who, did you remember who he was? Like, what kind of guy he was? - No, I got, I was so young. I got out. - He was sort of, he was, like, the mayor. (laughing) - It was Buddy C. ANSI. - Yeah, it was Buddy C. ANSI. He got tired of selling his pasta sauces. (laughing) Buddy C. ANSI was the mobbed-up mayor of Providence, Rhode Island, and he actually got re-elected from jail at one point. He went to jail for burning his wife's lover's penis with a cigar. He had two guys hold him down and he severely mangled this guy's genitals with a cigar, lit cigar, and went to jail and they got re-elected as mayor from jail. And you would go down to Rhode Island and you would see in all the stores this Buddy C. ANSI pasta sauce that you wouldn't see anywhere else. - Very, very odd. - I'm gonna try. - Is it good? - No, it's okay. You're a very picky eater though. - Yeah. - You might be the pickiest eater I've ever met. - Oh, thank you. - But you will try things occasionally. I got Tim to eat duck the other day for the first time. - Yeah, that was good. - Yeah, see, duck's good stuff. - Yeah, I like duck. - Duck's good stuff. I don't know if I would've gone with America's most wanted this night. It's Halloween week. There's all kinds of movies on, and what you've passed up was The Hand, which is a 1981 Michael Caine movie where he is haunted by his severed hand, which lives on its own. - Wait, I'm trying to think, I think I might, I'm thinking about this in my head, and I think I might be mixing it up with something else. Like, do you remember, was there like a double feature of possibly Stephen King inspired stories? And one was about like severed hands attacking someone? - Severed hands attacking someone. - It was like that and something else, like Quicksilver Highway or something. - Oh yes, Quicksilver Highway did have, it wasn't anthology series. - Oh, okay. - The anthology movie was made for Showtime. This movie was actually directed by Oliver Stone. - Really? - Directed The Hand and Michael Caine stars in it, and TV Guide only gives it one star, so they're saying that The Hand and Problem Child 2, on the same plane, these two movies. So I would've gone with that ore. This was the debut, I would've stuck it on Nickelodeon. - Oh, I know. - Of our real monsters. - Yes, I actually, I did watch that as a kid, and I was tempted, but yeah, I think the call of the serial killers was a little. - That was a fun second wave Nicktoon. - Yeah. - And it was a little bit gross out. That one monster whose armpits were very hairy, and he had his own eyeballs. But it was a fun show. I really enjoyed that show, and I purchased the entire series of one-shot factory, put it out, and I re-watched it around Halloween. It's a good cartoon. - I do like it. I never really liked the main character, though, I thought it was a little whiny. - Yeah, yeah. - Like everyone else, like, I really liked in it. - Yeah, it was very beetle juicy from that cartoon, which was a good thing. 9.30 would you go with? - Are you afraid of the dark? - So you skipped out on Nickelodeon for our romances, but came back for "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" And this one is a movie theater is haunted by a screen vampire. - Yes. - I remember this one. - I vaguely remember it. - Did you watch that every week? - Yes. - Was that the first horror anthology series you remember watching? (sighs) - As for series, yes. I think-- - So I think a lot of kids were exposed to that before, like, Twilight Zone or anything else like that. A lot of kids your age. - Yeah, I also watched "Tales From The Crypt," but we didn't have HBO for a while, so that would only be when I was, we'd take trips to my grandma's house. - Right, that's the place to watch "Tales From The Crypt" at the grandma's house, with the bear brush that's wearing, and I assume you didn't watch that with your grandma. - Oh, no, no. - Did you ever watch the edited episodes that were on Fox? So Fox used to air the edited "Tales From The Crypt." - Yeah, I wasn't like at like 10 or 11 or something. - Yeah, I used to watch those, yeah. - I knew this guy that my mother worked with, and his daughter used to watch "Tales From The Crypt" on Fox all the time, and so they thought that was the show. And they went to go see "Tales From The Crypt" "Demon Night," which was the first "Tales From The Crypt" movie, and it's much more like the HBO show without the editing. There's a lot of breasts and a lot of swearing, and they were appalled. They stormed out of the theater, and they were like, "This is not like "Tales From The Crypt." And everyone was like, "Ah, yeah, pretty much is." I don't know what you're talking about, 'cause they'd only seen the edited version. It would be like someone buying only the edited version of a rap CD, and then going to the concert, and being like, "What is this?" - I don't know if you remember from "Demon Night," but there was a scene that drove me crazy when I saw it as a kid, where they go into the room, and Thomas Hayden Church's character has these like a little... - Jumpercables on his nipples, yeah. - And as a kid, I was obsessed with it. I was like, "What is he doing? I don't get it." And like, I used to ask my brothers like, "Why is he doing that to himself?" And like, I had an idea that it was vaguely sexual, but my brothers would just be like, "Ah, we'll tell you when you're older." But they never told me. - Well, maybe you're not old enough. You should call them tonight and ask if they're ready to tell you. - Yeah, did you see you saw that on TV? - Ah, yes. - So I saw that in the theater, and I really, I think that movie's underrated. The first "Tils and the Crit" movie. - Yeah, no, I think it's good. - It's a great night of "Living Dead" sort of siege movie. - How did you, did you have to sneak into the theater? - No, I have been the same height and roughly looked the same since I was 13 years old. I had this really bad growth spurt when I was 12 over the summer, which was very painful, and got basic liquor sideburns and been six foot three since I was 12. And so no one, I've never been carted for anything. I used to hang out at bars in the city when I was in punk rock. I'd hang out like the rat, no one would ever card me. I could just like vault in and no one ever said anything. So I never had a problem at the movies. - Ah, it's awesome. - It was, I guess it was, yeah. But the other part was everyone thought it was way older, which is not necessarily a good thing when you're 13 or 14 'cause they treat you like you're 19 or 20. People want to fight you. - Oh, really? - That's what happens, yeah. So Sunday night, Tim, "The Lord's Night." What have you gone with at a clock? - I remember this was actually pretty tough, but I-- - Tough 'cause there was too much choice or not enough? - Too much, okay. - But, I mean, how could I not do the Simpsons? - So we went with the Simpsons. You're a die-hard Simpsons fan. - Oh yeah, that was the first show that I remember like specifically like making sure to catch. - Right, that was your appointment show because I imagine on Monday mornings at school, all the kids were talking about Simpsons. And so this is not a "Triels of Horror" episode. - Unfortunately. - This is a rerun from 1990. The family moves to Capitol City when Homer's success as a minor league ball team mascot, Lance, and Michad the Major Leagues. This is a pretty classic episode. This is a very good one. And you didn't pass up much good that night, although the family channel game show, that's my dog. Which was people bringing their dogs and running them through an obstacle course. And that was the family channel game show. - Okay. - And they would win like a $50 gift card. - And were there people that were dismayed that went like, "That's my dog?" - Yeah, I don't think he was like, "She's the sheriff." Yeah, they were like, "Where's my dog?" And it's Suzanne Summers and they're like, "That's my dog?" And they're like, "Yes, Suzanne Summers is your dog." But you passed up "Innocent Blood," which is a John Landis vampire movie from the early 90s that was airing on Cinemax, which would have been great that week for Halloween. That's a pretty good movie if you haven't seen it. - I have not, actually, I need to check that out. You also recommended Martin to me recently, which I just need to check out. - That's another good vampire movie. That he's speaking of the George Romero movie, not the Martin Lawrence to come. But "Innocent Blood" starred, and I forget how to pronounce her name, but it's like, "Paraloud," or "Paraloud," she was a French actress who was in the original Le Femme Nikita. And it was supposed to be her big American breakthrough, and it never really panned out. But it's an interesting movie, and it's got a, if you like, American werewolf in London. - Love it. - It's almost an unofficial sequel to that movie. - Really? - Yeah, it's-- - Oh, I got to check it out. - It's set with vampires, but it's a fun movie, and it doesn't get much love these days. - Definitely watch that. - 8.30 would you go with? - See, this is what I really wanted to watch at 8, but the second half of "Nature" is a documentary, yeah. - Really? So was it about animals murdering each other, and then someone wanted to watch it? - No, it was about raccoons and beavers, I believe. - Yes, the bandit and the builder contrast the behavior of raccoons and beavers. The raccoon, host George Page says, is a thief, something of a scoundrel, while the beaver is an architect and a workaholic, observed a beaver inspecting a pond. So would you truly find this interesting or you just, this is a goof? - No, I love animals, and I would definitely, I would, if I could find that, I would love to watch that. - Just beavers and raccoons. - Well, no, well, I like most animals, like-- - Most furry animals? - Oh, definitely, yeah. And I've actually recently made a list of every animal I've ever pet, and-- - That's a weird list, then. - Well, I've pet 21 different types of animals. - Okay. - And I'm trying to eat your pet a new type of animal. - So you want to get to however age you are? - Exactly. - Do you want to have pet that many kinds of animals? - Precisely. - That's an interesting goal. I've never heard that goal before. You just came up with this on your own? - Yeah, a couple of months ago, I had my 28th birthday and that kind of made me think about a lot of stuff. - Of what I could pet. (laughs) - Exactly. - Don't have to pet anything. - No, no, well, I'm not like that. - Okay, well that's good. - But yeah, as far back as I can remember, I've always wanted to pet a monkey, and so that would be my ultimate goal. - They're very unpleasant. - Really? - Yes. - Very unpleasant animals. - I don't know if I believe that. - Terrier, oh, I've petted a monkey and I've shaken hands with various monkeys. - Really? - And they are-- - A type of kapuchins. - Kapuchins, chimps. - Chimps, sorry, eaps. - Gibbons. - Gibbons, oh. Baboons. - Oh, I fucking hate baboons. Baboons are my number one most hated animal. - So you wouldn't pet a baboon. - I would pet-- - For my animals, you're not gonna pet a baboon. - I would pet it, but I would definitely, like, be very wary of it. - Do they squeeze its hand? - Yeah. - What's the weirdest thing you've ever petted? This is where I've never asked anyone. (laughing) - I mean, maybe a dolphin. - You petted a dolphin. I petted a dolphin, actually. I've rubbed a dolphin's tongue. - Oh, really? - Yeah, they like that. - I, when I was in, I think six or seventh grade, my family took a vacation to Hawaii. - Okay. - To Thailand. - I don't remember. - Sorry. - This is a lot. So we're just gonna check out. - We went to some type of, like, water park, and one of the things you do is, like, you could, like, you know, have kids train your dolphin, but-- - That sounds like a good insult to the other someone. Hey, go have some kids train your dolphin, asshole. (laughing) - But, like, my parents signed me up for it, and it's actually kinda lame, 'cause, like, the dolphin's already trained. You're basically just feeding it fish, and it does tricks. - Right, but that's life, man. - Yeah, but I just really wanted to get in there and swim with a dolphin, and, like, you can't do that. Like, you'd basically just sit from the sidelines. - That terrifies me. Being in the water with a dolphin would terrify me. - Oh, I would love it. But what happened was the trainer person, I was like, oh, do we get to swim with a dolphin? The trainer's like, oh, no, I'm sorry. You can't actually get in the water with him. And then he leaned into my dad and whispered to him, it'll try to have sex with him. - Oh, I thought you were gonna, he was gonna lean into him and go, unless some money comes from her. So this guy tried to save you from a sexual assault by an adult. - Basically, yeah. - It'd be funny if he wasn't just concerned about that for everybody, but just he sized you up and went, oh, yeah, this kid, he would just be fresh meat in there, yeah. So you petted a dolphin, and that's the weirdest one. They have a very spongy feel. - Yeah, it's a little rubbery. - Yeah, the tongue, they love rubable tongue. I've petted a sea lion and otters and seals. - You might have pet more stuff than me. - Oh, and why have I had a couple more years on you? Oh, I know for a fact I've probably petted more stuff. I haven't made a what have I petted list, but maybe I'll sit down if I have some free time, Tim, and we can compare notes. So where were we, 9.30? - No, 9. - 9, what'd you go with? - Married with children. - So you watch this every week? - Not every week, I didn't watch it religiously. I think I actually watched it more once it was in reruns and stuff. - And you enjoyed this show? - I do, I like really, really goofy stuff, and just the, over the top, like, violence and stuff was so cool. - You like two niche live action shifts. - Yes. - So this one is as a Jefferson year. And Jefferson learns the doll he's bought from Marcy is worth a small fortune. So he asks Al for a big favor. Sleep next to Marcy while he trades dolls. I've seen this episode. Have you, are you familiar with this episode? - I have, I'm glad you are because if you're just laughing, you've never seen it and you're just laughing from the description alone. I would be very concerned about you. - I just remember like Al's face when he's in the bed. - Yeah. - 'Cause he does hate Marcy. She grosses him out. - Yeah. - You know what I probably would have gone with them? - What's that? - A half hour ghost. - Okay. - I enjoyed that movie. - I've never seen it actually. - I saw that in the theater by myself when I was 10 years old. And it was, I went on like a Tuesday afternoon and it was me and a bunch of basically cat ladies. And they were all crying. I remember, I caught about, I must have been 13 or 14 and I went over some kid's house and all of the other kids in our grade were all in the basement. And normally when they would do that, they'd be watching some sort of pornography and all like, petting their dolphin. (laughing) But I, which is just weird. I never understood that teenage impulse for like group. - Yeah, no, that's very strange. - It's a little bit weird. I was only over like one sleepover where like that happened. Like, I remember like, we were having a good time watching like Golden Eye and then-- - Well, you say Golden Girls. - Yeah. - Someone got too excited. - But then like, yeah, it sounded like the kid's mom went to bed and they were like, all right. And they were like, you know, we get the Spice Channel and they go something again. - Did you get out of there? - Yeah, I think at that point I'm just gonna go to bed you guys. - Yeah. - I don't know. - Good, you made the right decision. - Yeah. - But so all these kids were down there and I thought that's what they're doing but they're actually watching Ghost. (laughing) And they were crying. And which is somewhat worse. I remember seeing his kid go, are you crying, watching Ghost? And he goes, well, I'm just thinking about my grandpa. (laughing) Which I didn't think was a legit excuse. - No. - No. - So I probably would have watched that far with that. Is that scary at all? - No, it's a love story. Oh, I don't know, you might be scared. - Well, like I would watch it if there's like horror elements to it, but-- - Super natural elements to it. Whoopi Goldberg is the comedic element that might scare some people, I don't know. (laughing) It's not a bad movie. You know, I've seen worse movies than that one. So 9.30 would you go with? - National Geographic Explorer. - Wow, you're really going for the nature on a Sunday night. - Yeah. - 9.30 would you go with the National Geographic Explorer? And this particular episode is, so you're watching the second half of this. - Yeah. - And this one is a Hindu priest who must roll his body nearly 2,500 miles as an act of penance and a climbing expedition. Also the yellow mongoose. - Yeah, the mongoose really has me intrigued. - Would you pet a mongoose? - Oh, definitely. - Yeah. - Would you pet a snake? - I have pet a snake. I used to have a pet snake. - What kind of snake? - Just like your average boa. - Is there such a thing as an average boa? - Wow, and did you feed it mice? - I did. It actually was killed by a rat that we tried to feed it. - Hold on a second. Let's rewind this right here. You had a pet boa constrictor that was murdered by a rat? - Yes. - That's not a thing. That doesn't happen. You sure you didn't try to feed it a mongoose? - No, it wasn't huge, but it got to the point where it's eating rats and I forget and hate rats. They're my probably like right under baboons for most hated animals. - Okay, so if you had like a baboon with just rats on its shoulders. - Yeah, but yeah, it would really gross me out. And actually well, my uncle owned a reptile ranch. - You say that like that's a thing. What exactly is a reptile ranch for this inform everyone? - It was just like a pet store, but you know, specialized in reptiles. - And is your uncle a single gentleman? - I don't know if he is now. No, I don't know. I think he had a wife, yeah. - Okay, that sounds like an activity of a real owner. I ran a reptile ranch. Did he wear a cowboy hat? - Sometimes. - Really? - Well, like I not like, I think like for the store. - When he went to work, he put that was his uniform, a cowboy hat? - It might have been. - He put little saddles on the reptiles, a little saddle on the stick. - That would be a good gimmick. - I'd go to that store. Well, it's already called the ranch. - Yeah, but we went there because he had heard that he was selling flying squirrels. It's like, I really wanted a flying squirrel. - You had heard that your uncle was selling, how does that information become part of your knowledge? Like, see your mom's like, I heard a rumor that Uncle Danny is selling flying squirrels. - Well, I don't know how I got like, I think it was something like that. Like my dad told me like, yeah, I think he's like, it just, it seemed like it wasn't like we thought, but we weren't completely sure. - Couldn't you call him? - Probably. - Yeah, would have been the best thing to do. But he, my mom, I hate snakes. And so like, we're gonna go, they get a flying squirrel, but she's like, whatever you do, don't get a snake. But my dad like really wanted a snake. - Are they gonna say, my dad really hated my mom? - No, well my, you're like, I don't know if you seen Pish and my dad before, but it's like this really big buff guy. He's like, he's a body builder. - I didn't know your dad was a body builder. So was the reptile ranch guy your dad's brother? - Yeah, it was like, I think my dad's uncle. - Oh, so he's a great uncle? - Yeah. - Okay. - Your dad's a body builder? - Yeah, I'll just show you pictures later. - Geez, okay. - But he's like, yeah, he's like a big dude with like tattoos and stuff. So like, you know, he-- - He's got a motorcycle? - He does, yeah. - Okay. - Hardly, yeah. And so anything you do to make himself like more badass, you do is like, I think he really wanted a snake. But we, I really want a flying squirrel. - I mean, that's the, the, the generation gap right there. If that wants a snake kid wants a flying squirrel, I mean, how many times have we heard that story? - But, but when we got there, it turns out, my uncle wasn't selling flying squirrels, mostly just reptiles, and so we did end up getting a snake. - Do you think your dad made the flying squirrel thing up so that he could go and get a snake for himself? - It's very possible. Yeah, I would not put it past him. But yeah, a snake is a terrible pet. - Oh, I know, I've had one. - Oh, yeah. - They're awful. - Did you keep it in your room? - No, I'm not a psycho. We had it in a spare room. - We had it in my room and like a, we would have to, you know, we'd feed it like mice and stuff. And you know, like snakes, they don't eat right away. They only eat when they're hungry. - Yeah. - So the mice would sometimes die in there from not, from starving, yeah. - And, or sometimes like, I would just go to bed and just wake up in the middle of the night to like the sound of like a mouse being murdered. - Well, that's nice, terrible. Do you think this has anything to do with your obsession with the museum of death? - Maybe. But I guess the point I was getting at is, so eventually it was getting a little bigger and we started feeding it rats and we had this one disgusting rat and it was like white with black spots. So it kind of looked like a gross cow too. Like it was like a rough rat cow. And we put it in there and I guess the snake wasn't hungry so it didn't eat it right away. So we just kept it in there overnight and we woke up the next morning. The snake just had all these holes in it 'cause the rat like would start eating it during the night. - So what did you do with this rat? - Well, I'm not proud of this. But, you know, the snake was done. - Yeah. - Then we took the rat, put it in like the little like plastic cage thing and came in from the pet store. Then we brought it to the porch and my brother took a BB gun and shot in his head. Kind of like as a. - So he executed. So you guys, Lord of the Flies, this rat. - It was very much like a mafia, like don't mess with the family kind of thing. - Right. - Yeah. And I didn't shoot it, my brother did, but I still-- - You were there. - I was there. - You stood by. You didn't stop it. - I'm not proud of it. - Well, hey, you know, I think the statute of limitations for rat murder is he's a dirty rat and he had to put him down. - Geez, Tim, that, I'm speechless. That's where it very rarely happens. - Sorry. - No, it's great. Reptile ranch. I would have gone with surfing. - Oh, nice. - I would have watched surfing. This was coverage of the Bud Pro Tour taped September 18th in California. I love watching surfing. I love surf culture. We're in surf land right now. I walked by, this is surf board right behind Tim. And I went and looked in three different surf shops today. I never been surfing. I just go in there and pretend that I know what I'm talking about. I talk to the guy. I look at the boards, talk shop. I think they bought it. Went to Malibu surf shop, you know. It's fun. - Have you ever been boogie boarding? - Yeah, I've been boogie boarding. - Me too. - It's not the same thing. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I always imagine like there's like a pro surf tournament and some dude just shows up with a boogie board. Like, come on, guys, let's go. And I'm like, no, this is not, yeah, not the same thing. So, let's move on to Monday night. The saddest night of the week, as we always say. What would you go with at eight o'clock? - Fresh Prince. - Everybody loves Fresh Prince. - Yeah. - So you watch this every week? - Yeah. - Who's your favorite character? - Probably, what was it? Jazz, I always liked. - Oh, really? - Yeah. - Would you stop kind of appearing later in the series? - Yeah, he was not, but it was like, that's always kind of like a treat. I always liked like the dumb guys. You're a fan of the dumb guys. So this episode, Ashley secretly abandons her private school education for the real world of public education, thanks to inspiration from Will. Dad ain't kind of like that. - No. - I would've gone with, on 80, it was biography week that will give you the creeps. So Monday eight o'clock was biography, Dracula. - Oh. - So I probably would've watched that. Or they were showing the Halloween tree, which was the adaption of the Ray Bradbury story, voiced by Leonard Nimoy. Love the story, although I have to say, the animated version is a little bit boring. - Oh, really? - Yeah, it's very 90s feeling. And it doesn't have, I've re-watched it since, but it doesn't have the charm that I want it to. - Is it a, the original Ray Bradbury story? Was I like, for kids or? - No, I mean, I don't think Ray Bradbury was ever writing for kids. A lot of his stuff is about kids, especially that era before he started really writing science fiction, when he was writing more of the nostalgic. He was one of the first writers that sort of embraced writing nostalgia stuff. And stuff about youth and he really had this idealized, very copper colored America that he used to write about. And sort of the October country, something wicked this way comes. - Yeah. - That sort of era of Ray Bradbury. I absolutely love, but it's, a lot of it is about kids or from kids' points of view, but I don't think they're inherently for children. Halloween Tree is one of the stories along those lines. Which I would recommend, if you never read it, it's a good story. - No, I need to read more Bradbury. I've only read Fahrenheit 451. - Yeah, I mean Fahrenheit 451 is a good, a great book, but it's, I always prefer the October country, dark carnival stuff that he did. And something wicked this way comes as one of my all-time favorites. - I really wanna read that. - It's a great book, it's really, really good. And for the biography, it says, "A revealing and often graphic look," host Jack Perkins says, "at the Dracula myth, as depicted in Bram Stoker's 1897 novel." - See, I wish I could have, I really love those types of shows. Like any type of like documentary on like some, like any type of monster or anything. Yeah. (laughs) I mean, the real stuff is interesting, but not. - Rather than monsters. - Yeah. - Yeah. I remember that when Bram Stoker's Dracula, the movie came out, "The Princess of a Copeland" movie. In the scholastic book flyer, you could buy a novelization of Bram Stoker's Dracula. - Oh. - Yeah. It wasn't Bram Stoker's book Dracula that he wrote. It was a novelization of the movie, Bram Stoker. (laughs) - I would have gone with the Mike Minola comic book. - Yes. Not that Boots came out at the same time, which I did remember purchasing. Tim is a huge comic book guy and a big Mike Minola fan as Hellboy's your favorite. - Yes, all time, yeah. - Absolutely favorite. So 8.30, what would you go with? - 8.30, I went with Blossom. - Do you enjoy Blossom? - Again, I'm not sure if I'd enjoy it now, but I did watch it as a kid. And I remember enjoying it for the most part. - It's not a bad show. I think it mostly holds up. I think if you overlook the Joey Lawrence content, which I think was necessary at the time. - It always seemed like a little more serious than most of sitcoms at the time, too. - It was, I mean, it's about a single dad and a sort of miserable, precocious teen that wasn't the cool kid. - I liked her friend, the neighbor. - Six. - Yeah. - Genevon Oye. - Yeah. - Genevon Oye. And I mentioned before I always wanted to start at an Oye fan called Genevon Oye, Oye, and nobody. Yeah. This one has Nick and Carol's wedding day arrives. There's something old. They're exes at the bachelor party in bridal shower. And something blue, the bitter little flower girl, Kennedy. - I don't know if that is Kennedy from MTV. She was big at this time, you know, probably isn't. I probably would have watched that. I enjoyed that show. Nine o'clock would you go with? - WWF wrestling. - You're wrestling fan. - Not so much anymore. Like I know there seems to be like this kind of resurgence where I know like a lot of people that are like into it that talk about I'm still watching it. But I'm not as big into it now, but around this time period, I really liked it. - So who's your favorite wrestler, Dr. Klahn? The undertaker. - The undertaker, I liked Roddy Roddy Piper. I was a big fan. - Oh, yeah. So you love they live? - They live, and that is one of my like probably, might be like one of my favorite movies. Probably in the top 10. - Have you gone to Skid Row here in L.A. to see the shooting locations that they live? - No, I probably like driven by some of it, but. - That's the best way to look at it. You would, if you think of those people as dolphins, you don't want to go in there, but yeah, you can go see pretty much everywhere that they live with shot or right in downtown L.A., right near the church from Prince of Darkness. - Oh, I want to check that out. - How have you lived, when you've lived here for over a year, what have you been doing? - I don't know. I never think about going to places where things rush out. - Maybe you're just not a weird loser like I am. (laughing) Those sorts of things. Piper, not a bad pick. I don't know if I would have gone with WWF wrestling. That is not my favorite. I sort of gave up on that once I started going through puberty. But what I probably would have gone with, in all honesty, is I would have been torn between Magnum PI, which was a repeat of the Christmas episode, which I'm a sucker for, or probably Party of Five, because I had a thing for Jennifer Love Hewitt. And I did used to watch that in this episode, the coming of a solar eclipse casts a shadow of gloom over Claudia's plans and foreshadows a family crisis. Charlie's confession clouds Kristen's hopes, and Julia can no longer keep undercover the secret of her job. - Now, if I remember correctly, the premise of the show was like, something happened to their parents early. - Their parents were killed, so the oldest brother who I think was 18 became the guardian and the patriarch of the family. - Was it, did it happen legally or were they trying to keep it undercover, like? - No, I think it was the legal guardian of these kids now, but he was a kid himself, and he became an alcoholic on the show. - Oh, wow, wow. That show had a lot of very special episodes. I kind of checked in and out of that show. - I think it would have been too serious for me. Even now, I don't really like serious stuff like that. I'm not a big drama guy. - You don't like dramas, you don't like to cry? - No, I love to. - Really? - When's the last time you cry? - I cried twice in the movie theater when I saw her a couple of months ago. - Who? - Her. - Who is she? - That the movie is kind of-- - I know. - I was who was on first date. - You cried during her? - Yeah. - It's in a sad movie, I haven't seen it. - I think there's sad parts. There's like a really sad part where he's on a date with this girl, and it's going really well, and then by the end, he just creeps her out, and she's just looking at him as just like, "You're a weirdo, you're a creep, stay away from me." - So it hit close to home. - Yeah, yeah. No, it's really sad. - Yeah. I also see that, should I see that movie? - I would highly recommend it. - I'm just kidding. - That weirdo creep is hitting you close to home. - Don't cry. Yeah, no, I've cried in movies many times myself, but I don't cry in real life, for whatever reason. Someone dies right now, don't cry. Go see a movie, and I have a sauce. - I'm the exact same way. - Yeah. - I'm sure there's some sort of chemical problem with our brain. - Yeah. - Yeah. So Tuesday night, eight o'clock, what are you going with? - This is another tough one, but I ended up with Full House. - So in this episode, Michelle thinks it's going to be a big joke when Joey is the substitute teacher in her class, but she's not laughing when he sends her to the principal's office for acting up. I remember this one. - Me too, yeah. - She really took it for granted that there was an appropriate behavior work environment and the home environment, and it was a tough lesson. - Yeah, what's weird is I always thought that it was weird that Joey was a comedian, but then he always had, would do these odd jobs and stuff, and I was like, why is he teaching stuff? But now I know somebody comedians that do do that. - They'd be lucky to be a substitute teacher. I actually know comedians who are substitute teachers. Yeah, you very rarely see that depicted in a show, a struggling comedian, unless it's the real world, David. But I would not, I sort of checked out at Full House by this time, although I do remember that episode. Wings is on, which is a favorite show of mine. This is a repeat. - That's what I was going to choose Wings, but because it was a repeat. My first girlfriend that I had used to make fun of me because I watched Wings and- - What? - Well, she- - What's her problem? - Who's this girl? I need to talk to her. - It's not her problem, but it's going to sound weird now, but she was black and- - Is she still black? - Yes. - Okay, yeah. - But she used to make fun of me because she said Wings was like the whitest show ever made. - How did you meet a black girl in Rhode Island? That's what I don't know. I don't think I've ever seen a black person in Rhode Island. I'm big, legitimately, I don't think I've ever seen a single black person in Rhode Island. - They're there. - Yeah. - Wow. - Did you, where'd you meet her at? - A tool? - Yeah. We went to the same high school, but we weren't really friends there, but then we met in college and she was like, best friends with my friend's girlfriend, yeah. - Okay, that sounds like a lyric. This is a lyric to some sort of emo there. - Best friends with my friend's girlfriend? Yeah. So she didn't like Wings. She thought it was too white. - She thought it was too white. - Did you ever say to her, like, that show is the blackest show I've ever seen and make fun of before? You could not. - No. - So I would go with Alien Nation, Dark Horizons, which was, the TV series Alien Nation on Fox was based on the movie, was canceled, and they wrapped up the series in a series of made for TV movies. - Okay. - These were made by Ken Johnson, who did V, which was a movie series, and also was responsible for the adaptation of The Incredible Hulk. And so this not only is an Alien Nation World premiere movie, but it was hosted by Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, as it started Fox cores like Halloween bash. So in this movie, freedom, racism, class status, and inter-species romance are themes running through this 1994 TV movie, which builds on the cliffhanger that ended the series last scene in 1991. LAPD Detective Sykes and Francisco are searching for a virus developed by Puris, who want to exterminate the 250,000 newcomers. They are assassinated by Aposano, an alien who's posing as a newcomer to facilitate the return of the newcomers to slavery on TikTok. He also wants to abduct the Earth's populace for domestic work. There's a lot going on there. I'm surprised you weren't into that. You're a side figure. - I kind of want to watch it now. - It's a decent show. You can pick them up on DVD. - Inner-species romance, was that between a human and an alien? - Yeah. - What did you think it was? A dog and a cat? - Just making sure. - Yeah, yeah, she's Tim. It's 30, what are you going on? - I would have watched the second half of "Unsolved Mysteries." - The Inner-species romance was a mouse in a rat, by the way. - Oh, that would have freaked me out. - They would freak me out if they procreated it. I wouldn't want to see a mouse rat. So "Unsolved Mysteries," this was a Halloween special on Lifetime. - Oh, okay. - So I watched this all the time. It terrified me, but a good show to watch during Halloween week. - I never watched it too much, but I wish I could go back and watch more 'cause it seems like-- - Well, I can set you up with some duties. - Oh, that'd be awesome. - Yeah. - What, can you read the description of that? - It doesn't have the description here. - Oh, okay, there's-- - This is Halloween. - There's another one maybe later in the week that had a description that I liked to get which one though. - Yeah, this is Lifetime, so they're airing it there. - Oh, okay. - So nine o'clock, what'd you go with? - I went with "Frazier." - Do you enjoy "Frazier?" - I do, yeah. - I never really got into "Frazier." I was a big Cheers fan, but for some reason I couldn't get into "Frazier," not enough Lilith from my take. - See, I'm the opposite. Well, actually, I like Cheers a lot now, but I never watched it when it was on TV. I recently just watched it all on Netflix, and it's great. - It's great, I think it's a lot better than "Frazier." - Yeah, but "Frazier," I liked it. I always thought I was so confusing, though. It's like, "Man, these guys are stuffy." - Yeah, but that's the whole point, isn't it? - Yeah, I guess, but it always just seemed, it kind of baffled me, 'cause their dad's not stuffy. - Well, that's true, I think that was the joke to him. - Yeah. (laughs) - I would've gone with "Saturday Night Live," where he runs on Comedy Central, and now before they were showing the 1984 through '86 seasons, which you never see really very much anywhere, and I loved those seasons, so I definitely watched them. - That was the cast, then. - There was a different cast every year, but '84, this '84 was when Lauren Michaels was not producing it, so he was still at Eddie Murphy, Julian Louis Dreyfuss was in the cast, then. In '85, you had their sort of all-star cast, which had Billy, excuse me, Billy Crystal, you had Harry Shearer, and what's Chris, oh my God, "Best in Show," Chris. - Oh, Christopher Guest. - Christopher Guest, you had all those sorts of people. - I don't think I've seen much of that ever. - Martin Short, that was '85, and then '80, '85, '86 is when Lauren Michaels came back and Anthony. Michael Hall was in the cast, Robert Downey Jr., Randy Quaid, Joan Cusack, John Lovitz, Didi Dravance, Terry Sweeney, I'm gonna have to name him all, I'll stop. - I wish I could go back and watch those, 'cause I really don't remember much. - They're easy to see. One of my favorite episodes of "Saturday Night Live Ever" is from that season, it was from Thanksgiving, 1985, and it was Paul Rubens hosted as Pee Wee Herman, and there's an amazing sketch on there called "Dinosaur Town," that I just love that sketch. Damon Waynes was in the cast. - So would, so Paul Rubens was pretended to be Pee Wee, and then when he was in "Sketches," would he be pretending to be Pee Wee playing a character? - Yes, he was Pee Wee in the whole show, which was interesting because he had been turned down as an SNL cast member four, five times. - Isn't that what made him do Pee Wee? - Yes, that's what sparked him to do, the original Pee Wee Herman show, so it was kind of an interesting triumphant return to "Saturday Night Live." It's a great episode, there's some really fun-- - Was Phil Hartman in the season at that point? - No, he was not in the cast, but I believe, and this may be apocryphal, but someone told me that Phil Hartman came to the show that week with Paul Rubens to write with him, 'cause he co-wrote big adventure. - And they both knew John Movis from "The Groundlings." So I believe that that's one of the reasons Phil Hartman was honest in that episode, but I may be wrong. So I would have watched that, and then at 9.30, what'd you go with? - I said "Grace Under Fire." - Did you enjoy "Grace Under Fire?" - I remember watching it, I don't remember specifically liking it. - So this was Brett Butler's sitcom, it wasn't a bad sitcom, it was, to my eyes was very much a rip off of "Roseanne." It was basically a single mom "Roseanne" in a lot of ways. And it wasn't a bad show, and this one graces caught in the crossfire between Nadine and Wade and their marital tensions escalate. It was a very southern show, but it did have Dave Thomas on it from S.C.T.V. who played a pharmacist and was a potential love interest for Brett Butler. I did like Dave Thomas. - I liked his character, yeah. - Normally I would-- - Did he have a son? - Or was it his-- - Maybe. - I think it was like there's a dad in the sun. - Yeah, I haven't re-watched the show on ages. I'd like to see it again, but I remember liking it. I wouldn't have watched it this week in particular though, because "The John Lara Cat Show" was on in one of its two seasons against it, and that is an amazing show. Dexter's recent history is whitewashing as John tutors him for a high school equivalency exam. Very great, good show. - Why was it so sick? - Yes, it was, it was very dark sitcom. John Lara Cat plays a recovering alcoholic, but the only job he can get is as the night manager of a very depressing bus station. - Wow, that, I really wanna watch this. - It's a great show, great show. Dan Harmon, who did "Community." It was the first show he was a writer on. I believe he was a staff writer. - I gotta see if this is available. - Yeah, with the guys who directed "The Winter Soldier." - Oh, "The Russo Brothers." - Yeah, I believe "The Russo Brothers" worked on "John Lara Cat Show" as well, as well. - I really wanna watch this now. - It's a great show, you would like it quite a bit. So let's move on a Wednesday night, eight o'clock, what'd we go with? - I've never seen this before, but it really intrigued me, Cosby mysteries. - The Cosby mysteries, so Bill Cosby, after "The Cosby Show," he tried to do several shows in the '90s, one was called Cosby, which was an American remake of British show called "One Foot in the Grave." He tried to do "The Cosby Mysteries," which were sort of made for TV movies, very much in the Colombo sort of mold. And it wasn't a great show, and this one, Hanks, played by Bill Cosby, tries to ferret out the truth behind the accidental killing of a 12-year-old honor student in a vacant inner city lot. You know, it was a pretty standard mystery detective show that just happened to star Bill Cosby. - It seems so dark for him, like. - A little bit, a little bit. I probably would've gone with a show called "Boys Are Back," which was not a great show, but it did star Hal Linden, who I love and will watch in anything. And he was Barney Miller, that's who Hal Linden was. Hal Linden was actually supposed to star in a Broadway musical, "Captain America," "Speeching the Wicked Soldier." Yes, and if you look at comic books from the early '80s, Marvel was running a contest to be in the "Captain America" Broadway musical. You'll see, you'd probably recognize the ad. It's "Captain America" with a cane and a hat singing. And they had written this play, and Hal Linden was gonna play like an out-of-shape, aged "Captain America" in the '80s, whereas he was a 1940s guy, and he was trying to recapture it. I've read the script or whatever, it's called the book or whatever it is. And it's very, very good, and it never got produced, and it would be interesting if they brought it back now, but it's probably not in keeping with the current Marvel. - Yeah. But I-- - I wonder if can you hear any like, songs from it? - I think there are tapes of some of the songs, so it was never produced. It never ran on Broadway, but they did. It was done as far as I know. I'm sure there's some Broadway musical nerd who listens to this show. - Okay. - And I know one in particular who might know about it. So, I'm speaking of Shaun Sullivan, of course. He may not know. - Oh, oh, nice. - But someone may know. But this is Fred, played by Hal Linden, pursues Jackie, the original homebody, to go with him on a fishing trip, but Jackie in a boat is like a fish out of water. And Jackie was played by Suzanne Plashet, who was the wife on the original Bob Newhart Show. And I will watch her in anything, too. Don Lake was also in the show, who's a huge second city guy, and is Bonnie Hunt's writing partner, and everything that she's done. So, it was a cool show with a good cast, and it just ate it. It didn't do very well. Nothing happened to you, it was not good. - Wait, what is it called, The Boys Are Back? - Because they're old guys, and they're, you know. This night, though, also aired a Halloween episode of Beverly Hills 902 and L, which weirdly did a Halloween episode every single year. They had one every year, one year, which was this year, featured an appearance by the punk rock band The Cramps, which I remember was extremely, extremely controversial amongst the punk rock friends that I had at the time that the cramps were on Beverly Hills 902. - They think it was like sellout. - Yeah, but I thought it was kind of great. I mean, it was, you know, what a way to really weird out the people who watched Beverly Hills 902 and L, I don't know if you'd like The Cramps, if you'd like the Cramps. - Oh, come on, yeah, I've never heard of them. They're sort of a horror punk. They invented a genre called, called like, punkabilly. That was sort of, or a psycho-billy, sometimes called, but it was, they sing a lot about 50's B movies, and the cramps are great. So, 830, what'd you go with? - 830, oh, well, Cosby Mysteries was an hour. - So, what you missed out on was a Halloween special, a pilot episode for series that never took off for the far side. - I saw the Adam as, very curious about that, 'cause I had no idea that that even existed. - So, they produced two specials. This was Tales from the Far Side. Join all your favorite characters and their first TV special as they take a look at all those spooky things that go bump in the night. This is based on the comic strip. It is 10 intertwined vignettes that feature many of the quirky characters. There's almost no dialogue in the whole half hour. It's almost completely silent. It's very, very good. I think it was way ahead of its time. It would be, if it was on Adult Swim or something now, it'd be huge, and I loved it, and I was so disappointed it didn't become serious, but I have a copy if you'd like to see it. - Oh, yes, that's awesome. - It's one of my favorite Halloween specials. It's great, great. - I didn't realize there was different characters in the far side. I thought it was always kind of like the same-- - The cow in the lid with glasses? - Yeah. - Yeah, no, you definitely did some different characters. So, let's go on to 9 o'clock, what'd you go with? - Well, I never watched it when it was on TV, but I chose Roseanne. - Do you watch it now? - Well, I would like to, but I don't know where you can watch it, like DVDs and stuff. - All the DVDs are easy to find. It's on and off Netflix, Hulu, Amazon, you can find it. This episode, they have famous Halloween episodes. There's actually, this might be a good starter for you if you can find it. I think it's still in print. There's a single DVD release of all their Halloween episodes. - Oh, it's just eight Halloween episodes on one DVD. - I think I was a, I just have like a bad memory of it because this one time when it was about, when the, I think it was the series finale. - Yeah. - At the time, I remember my parents were having like a party in their living room, so I couldn't watch TV in the living room. - Yep. - So I went to watch TV in my brother's room 'cause he was older, so he had a job. - But still lived at home? - Well, he was like 16. - Oh, I'm like 16. - He's like a 16, 17. - Should be out of this room. - But, so I went into his room and I watched the secret world of Alex Mack. - Yes. - And then when he came home, he went, he was taping Roseanne. - You fucked up his tape? - I fucked up his tape, it was a series finale. - Oh, he beat the shit out of you? - He, he didn't beat me up. Like, we never got into physical fights, but he was pissed. - Oh, I bet he was. - And, I don't know, it just, it left a bad imprint. - I would have murdered somebody with that. Like, I literally would have just- - You go to watch it, just Alex Mack, all the sudden. - Squeeze the life out of you with my bare hands. Yeah, so I understand that. But you should check it out again. This one, Leon, who was playing with Martin Mol, does himself hosting a Halloween sware at the lunchbox clan and a bevy of his gay friends show up, many of whom seem to know Fred intimately. Diana Ross was in this episode, but it wasn't the real Diana Ross, it was a drag queen. - Oh. - Jasmine. This is a really good episode. All their Halloween episodes are great. You would absolutely- - I really wanna check it out now, I think enough time has- - Yeah, it's a great show, I think you'll get over it. I would have watched this absolutely, but I will mention, model Zinc was on, which was a show I watched every week on Fox. It was a ridiculous show and in this one, an anniversary in Adam's life is no cause for celebration. For him or Monique, Hillary tells a white lie to get carried to see a psychiatrist. Brian gets the lowdown on a visit from Cynthia Stalker and a question of commitment plagued Sarah and Mark. It was a nighttime soap that was ridiculous, it was about models, I couldn't not watch it, it was just fun. - You like models, right? - Yeah, I'm somewhat obsessed with the world of modeling, not even in like a pubescent way, just for whatever reason. - Did you ever read "Milly of the Model"? - I did, yes, I did, I read a lot of the Marvel romance comics from the '50s and '60s, yeah. Jack Kirby did a lot of those. There's some fun weird stuff in there and Patsy Walker was later folded into the regular Marvel universe as a hell cat. - Hellcat, yeah. - So we're at 9.30. - Yeah, I would have watched Ellen. - Did you watch Ellen a lot? - I don't know if I watched it a lot, but I do remember watching it. I remember liking Bruce Campbell's character. - Yeah, I enjoyed the show once Bruce Campbell had come onto the show, was always pretty entertaining, but for some reason-- - Honestly, I would watch him in anything. - Yeah, I mean, Bruce Campbell is gonna be, I assume you watch "Burn Nodes." - I do, yeah. - It's great show. - Yeah. - It's the '18 with Bruce Campbell. - It's really good. And I used to watch all that, like all, like whenever you'd show up in like Zina-- - Prince of Steve, Zina, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Did you watch "Briscoe County Junior?" - That I never saw. - Oh, you would love "Briscoe County Junior." - I should check that out. - "Briscoe County Junior." So I would have gone with "Dream On" at this time. - Okay. - Which was an HBO show, which was produced by John Landis and Kevin Bright, who later went on to do "Friends." It was a fun show. There were always boobs in it, but that's not why I watched it. Martin Wren's "A New Woman" played by Kim Cottrell, on whom he had a high school crush. This is a fun episode, it's a fun show, it's funny. It has a really weird conceit. - Was there like, it was called "Dream On," was there like fantasy sequences? - So there were fantasy sequences, but the conceit of the show was that this guy was raised by television essentially. So every time he would have a reaction, instead of a voiceover, it would be a clip from an old movie or TV show. - Oh, I see. - That would sort of pepper or comment on the situation. So it was very cleverly done. And I identified with it quite a bit, because I still have that when people talk to me. I know, it's a big shock. You know, I instantly go back to a scene from a TV show or a movie or whatever, maybe appropriate at the time. So I really enjoyed that aspect of it. It was a fun show. So Thursday night, eight o'clock. I will mention at seven o'clock, one of my favorite shows, "Beyond 2000," was on the Australian Science Magazine Show. And in this episode, they're spotlighting a wheelchair that can climb stairs. - Oh, wow. - Which I've still never seen. This is 20 years ago. Where is the wheelchair that climbs stairs? They got it in Australia 20 years ago. Where is it here? So eight o'clock, what are you going with? - I'm gonna watch Martin. - Well, Martin, it was the Halloween special. And it was hosted by Elvira, who hosted the whole week of vlogs. - There you go. - So this is Martin and living single Halloween specials. Get ready for the scariest wildest Halloween episodes of them all. This one says from 1992, so it's a repeat of Martin. On Halloween, Martin and his friends gather at his house to tell ghost stories, but they all get scared silly after holding a saance. Did you ever do a saance at like a sleepover, or is it rather stiff as a board or anything? - Not so much that stuff, but I had a friend that was also into a lot of paranormal stuff, and we would go ghost hunting and try to contact the dead and stuff. - Do you believe in that stuff? - Oh yeah, without it. - Really, absolutely, so you're a true believer in the paranormal. - Yes, I believe in almost everything. - Really? - Well, I don't really believe in a lot of religious stuff, but ghosts, Bigfoot, aliens, - Fairpods. - Mermaids, Tim. - Well, not like the little mermaid. - Well, that would be silly. - But like, I don't know if you've heard of aquatic ape theory. - I've heard of aquatic ape theory. - That like, it's not that far off to believe that they're kind of like monkey fish. - Missing lynx. - Yeah, I was actually-- - Do you only believe in them so that you could pet one and get two, cross two animals off your list? - I was actually, that actually would be a time saver, but I was actually really pissed because last year on Animal Planet-- - Yeah, they had a fake documentary about mermaids. - Yes, but they don't tell you it's a fake documentary. - Well, hey, Tim, it's pretty obvious. - I specifically watched that at nine o'clock, ran into the living room where my two roommates were at the time and said, "You guys, you aren't gonna believe this, mermaids are real, they have proof, they're showing it again in an hour, we're gonna watch it." And then like, we watched in my roommates, were like, "I don't think that that's real." And I was like, "No!" Like, are you kidding? Like, look at that footage. And then the next day, Animal Planet put out a disclaimer like, "Oh, it's not real." - Did you watch the alien autopsy that came out and I think it was real? Do you remember that around this time? - I do remember that. - And did you fall for that? - I did think that was real. And then there's also, I wish my other friend saw this too. I wish I remember what it was 'cause I'd love to see it again, but I remember watching a special, I wanna say it was on like PBS or some type of network like that about a family that was being terrorized and like they kind of lived in like a house is kind of like a varnish-like area that was being terrorized by aliens and like they kind of had like all this like, shaky camera footage and stuff. - Yeah, I mean, I used to read a lot about that stuff going up and I always loved in search of and sightings and all those sorts of things, but I don't believe any of it. I just kind of find it. I mean, I think there are very easy psychological explanations for all these sorts of things. - Well, I think, I mean, I definitely get that. It's just to me, I just think the world's a lot more interesting if this stuff does exist. - So you, it's a fantasy fulfillment for you. - Yeah, like I would rather live in a world, you know, where Mothman and Goatman and the Jersey Devil and all these guys are real. - But you don't find them scary. You just like the fact that they exist is interesting to you. - Oh yeah, definitely. If I saw them, I'd probably be scared. - Yeah, you wouldn't try to befriend them. Would you try to pet them? - Depending on who it was. - So Mothman's got some big fuzzy hairs that probably look very inviting. Did you see the Mothman Chronicles? - No. - I'm surprised you haven't seen that movie. - I always meant to see it, but. - So I wouldn't go with Martin this night. I wasn't a huge fan of Martin, but-- - I just think of the theme song right now. - Martin. Yeah, I would have gone with speaking of great theme songs, my so-called life. - Oh, nice. - A show that I absolutely love. And one of my all-time favorite shows. - I'd like to watch it again. I feel like I'd appreciate it. - It folds up. It's a great show. It's very, very good. And I've set it before in here. My so-called life is when I think back when I was 14, my just picture of my so-called life, back to the dream on thing. But I was 14. The show was about a 14-year-old. That show more than any other show, it took place in suburban Pittsburgh, but felt very much like the suburban Boston neighborhood I lived in. It was very of that time. And so it takes a great snapshot of a very specific time and place and mentality for me. I don't know, you're younger than me, it may seem more dated, but to me it's sort of dated in a good way. And this Halloween episode is great. It's the Nikki Driscoll episode if people are fans. - I always felt, I think because of my age and stuff at the time, I always felt like I'd be made fun of if I watched a show starring a girl. - Really? - See, I always identified more with girl characters or for whatever reason. And really I've had mostly female friends for some rude reason. - See, I wasn't like that growing up, but I'm more like that now. So I would like to, and I remember watching it later and liking it, I think watching some repeats and stuff, but I'd like to really go and watch the whole thing now. - Yeah, I mean, it's well worth watching. Claire Danes was great. Around this time she was David Scott Ben Lee, who's a singer and he came and played at the Middle East and I went and just stared at her like a creep. And also, you know, this show, also I will mention that this girl had a huge crush on my freshman year in high school. The only girl that I had a crush on, maybe the entire four years of my high school career, was the only other person that watched my so-called life. And I would talk to her about it every Friday in history class and it was like the complete highlight of my week 'cause I had something to speak to her about. But I also liked the show quite a bit. And I would marathon it. So after I got canceled, I had tapes of it all and I would do my so-called weekends. People would come over and we'd just watch all the episodes. We'd stay up all night and eat pizza and drink Coke and watch my so-called life for, you know, 18 hours. - That's awesome. - I should do that now. I should do the mid 30s, so-called weekends. - Did people get tired of that? 'Cause I used to do the same thing. Like with my friends, I would always have them come over and be like, "Oh, we gotta watch this and stuff." And like after, it'd always be like kind of a lot of weird comedy stuff, like Mr. Show or like, Upray Citizens' plan or something. And then like after a while, my friends just got to the point when like, "Come on man, we gotta do something else." Like we can't. - Yeah, I mean, I definitely tend to assault people with, you know, you've been the victim of that. You've come over to my house before it. I'm like, "You gotta watch this and I'll show you something." But these would be, we'd do events. You know, it would be like a planned event. Like we'd have like my so-called weekend. We're watching, we're marathoning my so-called life. People know some people don't stay for the whole thing. People come in for some of it. They leave for some of it. We would do that. We'd always marathon and I would do young ones marathons. - Oh, I would. - So we would do like, you know, all nights, stay up and watch all the young ones episodes. 'Cause they were both, you know, I think there are 14 or 15 young ones episodes. And, you know, 18, my so-called life episodes. So it's doable at a night. You know, on a Saturday night, we all stay up and then, you know, we get donuts and whatever the next morning and it's a fun thing to do. You know, maybe we'll get a big one of those with all the fans of the podcast. All thousands of people that listen to this. - That'd be great. - We'll rent a theater on a Saturday night and we'll just do my so-called weekend with pizza and donuts. - Oh, I can't imagine anything better. - Maybe we'll do a Kickstarter for that because we'll have our TV guidance counselor convention on my so-called weekend. So that's what I would have gone with. 8.30, are you going with Living Single? - No, I never watched that again. - It's a great show. - Yeah, it was a bunch of girls that were-- - Yeah, did you not watch it 'cause it was girls? - I mean, I feel like I'm kind of like an idiot, but yeah, that probably did turn me off a little bit. - I should mention to listeners that every time Tim says the word girls, he does the legs handkerker. He does the pepper grinder legs hinge. I don't even think he knows he's doing it. It's like very subtle. It's like the subtle hill hibler. You know, not like the just the hay one, not the big one. It's just the girls with the little hand grinder. - How was like growing up? I was like very scared of girls. - Yeah, that's normal. - Yeah, and I don't know. I just felt like, I don't know. Sometimes I'd feel awkward just watching something. - Like you were gonna get in trouble for watching yet or just like it wasn't for you. - No, just like, I don't know. Just, it just, I feel like I wasn't supposed to. Like, yeah, like it wasn't for me. - I don't know. - Oh, I used to watch shows with girls in them. I used to read teen magazines about girls. I was sassy. I was a huge fan of sassy. I had a subscription to sassy. The other magazines I would read were my sisters and I would take them. But sassy used to come with my name on it. That's what sassy was. And I actually got, they sent me as like a subscription gift. These mailing labels that said, "Miss can read." (laughing) They just assumed like my name was for Kendall or something. I guess it made sense. Why would a boy have a subscription to sassy? I still cherish those. I have all my sassy back issues. Maybe I should have a sassy cast. Where we just talk about, I'll go through all the magazines I have after TV God is over, I'll do a sassy cast. - Sassy cast. - Sassy cast. - Yeah. - I'm making up for it now though. I love women now. - Well, that's good, Tim. That's good. You've officially gone on the record. We have it on tape that you love women now. Tim is looking for love of a Los Angeles ladies. So if you want me to put you in touch with Tim. - My name on OKCupid is super fun guy, 52. If anyone wants to-- - Is it really? - Yeah. - If anyone wants to date me. - How successful is that screen name for you? - One time a girl sent me a message and she said, "So are you really a super fun guy?" And I replied, "Yeah." And then like I said, another message. Well, I mean, I'm not like crazy. Like, I like to have fun, but I don't know. Sometimes I like to stay in. I'm not boring, but I'm kind of like-- - She never, no. - No. - All right, Tim, maybe after we finish this, Tim, you and I will redo your OKCupid profile for you. - Oh, that'd be perfect. - I think your name should be ghoulish time. And I think you would really pull in some sort of gothic checks with the name ghoulish time. - Okay. - I think that would be pretty good. - It's like, I like that it's like a mix of like goth and you know, women are like adventure time. - Yeah, ghoulish time, you can't go wrong with ghoulish time. We're changing your name to ghoulish time and I bet you'll have three days by the time I lose. - Okay, just on OKCupid or like legally. - If we can do it legal in Monday, we'll go to the court and we'll legally change it. If you're willing to go that far, I think you'll get an even bigger payoff. But at the very least OKCupid should be ghoulish time. - Okay. - All right, we're doing it. So 8.30, you didn't go out living single. What did you go with? - I would watch friends. - So friends was the white living single. Your black girlfriend should have smacked you for watching friends over living single. Friends were the rip off of living single absolutely in every way. So living single that night was on Halloween, Khadija grapples with the mystery in her relationship with Terrence and Overton stirs up a batch of scare tactics to flight, to frighten Max. Now that sounds a lot better than Joey's new agent gets him a cheeky role in a movie and Chandler dates a woman. (laughing) Which of those sounds better, Tim? Which of those is super fun guy 42 and which of those is ghoulish time? I think the answer is clear. - The description actually says Chandler dates a woman. - Chandler dates a woman as if that's news to anyone. - I don't know if that's a good show but for whatever reason I did watch it growing up. - I'm not even gonna go there with that one. Let's move on to nine o'clock. - That one. - So on this one, clash is over freedom of choice to strip Jerry and Elaine's duck dinner. Elaine's new relationship and Kramer's new business. Meanwhile, George opts for watching a video instead of reading the book club book. This is one with Poppy. He doesn't wash his hands. - Oh yeah. - Yeah. - That's a pretty good one. - And George had to actually go to the house 'cause the movie was rented, right? - Right. - Yeah. - Oh, that was good, yeah. - So I probably would watch that. I watched, I absolutely watched that. So I probably would watch that, I watched, I absolutely watched Seinfeld at this time. Although on HBO, one star movie, The Best of the Best Two was on, starring Eric Roberts as an Olympic kickboxer. Which was a movie I frequently watched. - A lot of one stars. - Yeah, well some are rentals on and that's three stars. - Oh. - Some are rental I saw in Narragansett, Rhode Island in 1982 at the Narragansett Pure Theater which is still there but not open. They were doing comedy shows there for a while and I used to spend my summers in Narragansett and in the sea there's a scene in the movie where the neighbor, it's a PG-13 movie so they don't show breasts. But the neighbor is like, I got a boob job, you want to see it, she takes a bra off and you see her back and in the theater, I went with my on hell and she covered my eyes and goes, no fucking way, like yelled no fucking way which was so much less damaging than if I had just seen this woman's back. - Is it 'cause she thought they were gonna show the breasts or she didn't want you seeing the back? - I think it was because she thought they were gonna show the rest. - Okay, okay. - I don't think she had a thing against backs but no fucking way it was her choice but that's a three-star movie according to TV. - I don't know if I've ever seen that one. - Oh, it's great, Carl Reiner directed it. He actually directed a rip of force summer school when he was on his summer double feature. So I might have watched the last half hour of that because the only thing on at 9.30 was "Mad Man of the People" which is "Daddy Coleman Show" which I didn't really enjoy despite liking "Daddy Coleman". What would you have gone with at 9.30? - Well, I never actually watched it growing up but I want to watch it now as Bob Newhart. - Yes, so this was the 1970s Bob Newhart Show which is very good but not as good as Newhart. - Okay. - And yeah, it's a good show. Suzanne Plashette, isn't that? You should watch that now. - Yeah, check that out. - Add that to your list. So Friday night, the final night of the week were three days before Halloween. What are you going with at eight o'clock? - Family Matters. - You missed out on "Unsolved Mysteries" for "Family Matters"? - Uh, yes. - Okay, so let's read "The Family Matters" first. So this is a Halloween episode. "Family Matters" was another show that had a Halloween episode every year. - Yeah. - Including the infamous "Stevel". - Yes. - And "Stevel 2". - Yes. - What a killer, Steve Urkel, ventriloquist doll. This one is on a dark and stormy Halloween night. The Winslow's play "Pass the Ghost Story", which is a game I've never heard. In which Carl and Harriet are 19th century vampires licking their chops over the way-faring Sir Steven who holds up at their castle. That sounds like the worst thing I've ever heard. (laughing) - I don't think I could even get through that. I don't know if I could get through that. I legitimately don't know if I could watch that. As someone said, "Can read", you sit down here and you watch this episode of "Family Matters" and we will give you $1,000. You know what? We'll finance your my so-called weekend and we'll fly all the fans out for it. I don't know if I could do it. (laughing) - I don't know, I'm not gonna apologize 'cause I love this show and I would- - Have you watched it recently? - I've watched it a lot in college. - Okay, how'd you do in college? (laughing) - I didn't know. - How's your GPA? - I don't know. - Yeah. - But I graduated. - Well, for Anna. - That's the only answer. So I'm gonna really watch the "Family Matters" episode. - But I don't know. It's just another thing that it was so dumb and over the top that I loved it. - You love dumb stuff? - Yeah. There was robots, evil dummies and stuff. And also, it's kind of like a good message if the whole overall series, it's basically if you pester a girl long enough, she'll marry you. - Is that a good message, Tim? I don't think that's a good message, Tim. If you build enough robots, and if you just stalk someone long enough, they'll eventually give in. That's the message you got from "Family Matters." I thought you were gonna be like, "It's a good message, family above all." You know, where our strongest assets are family, blood ties and you're like, "Just pester a girl." And you can add her to your list of things you've petted. (laughing) - Well, Tim, I would've gone with "Unsolved Mysteries." - This might've been the one off the description that I didn't-- - I shocked you didn't go with this based on what we've discussed earlier because this is reports include video footage of alleged UFO sightings that occurred over Mexico City in 1991 during a solar eclipse, might be the same solar eclipse from party of five. A fugitive's arrest in Cobb County, Georgia, and the 1992 murder of a man who was asleep in his vehicle while searching for a missing Rhode Island couple. - Yes. - So it was Rhode Island specific even and you didn't watch it? - I, this is really tough for me, but that, but the past thing goes. - Yeah, past it goes. So wait 30, did you go with "Boy Meets World?" - I did, yeah. - Also a Halloween episode. This is before the show got bad. This is actually a pretty good episode. And this one, Corey experiences puberty, but a fortune teller, played by Phyllis Diller, convinces him that he's really turning into a werewolf. - I think we all thought we were becoming werewolves as we went through puberty that I think we can all, we can all identify with that. - This is a really good episode. If memory serves to, I think at, 'cause like he had gotten bit by something, and I think at the end it turned out to be like a rabbit or something. - Yes, it might have been a rat that killed snakes. - That was a good episode. - That is a good episode. Nine o'clock would you go with? - X files. - So at least you passed up step by step. So we'll, even though Susan's on the cover of this magazine, we come full circle and you passed up step by step, which was a Halloween episode, and this one, a cute girl played by Michelle Williams, lures Mark into a mischief at a Halloween party, but the trick is no treat when they get caught. She basically has him pranking. She's kind of like a punk rock gothic chick. The kind of chick that would go out with a ghoulish time, and Mark's the nerd you want to get in trouble. - Yeah, I think I remember this, 'cause I did actually used to watch step by step. - I'm sorry. - But I think that actually might be like, I think I had like crushes on the girls on that one. They were all kind of cute. - Well, they are, yeah, they're cute girls on that show. Also, he passed up New Hampshire Chronicle, which Fritz Weatherby examines the Jacko lanterns and pumpkins on display in downtown King, New Hampshire. - Oh, interesting. - But X files that night is a repeat from last season. This is near a Native American reservation, agents looking into the shooting of a man who could seemingly change into an animal. - Yeah, I remember that one. That was a good one. - That is a good one. Most X files episodes were good until about season eight. - Yeah, that was when Mulder left. - Yeah, got replaced by Robert Patrick. So you've passed up hanging with Mr. Cooper at 930, not a Halloween episode. - I remember watching that too, but, you know, it's not. - I should mention that 2020 was on, which again was the one show my parents didn't allow me to watch and I feel obligated to read what it was about that night. So this was Barbara Walters, interviews Barry Gordon, who discusses according to his segment producer Christopher Harper, how Motown, who started on the $800 loan from his family, his personal and professional relationships with Diana Ross and his autobiography, not very scary, sounds a little bit boring. So Tim, as you know, TV Guide is not just informative. The Cheers and the Cheers, that's opinions. I will read you the Cheers and Cheers from this week, October 26, 1994, and see if you agree or disagree. - All right. - First, we have a Cheers to Christine Anamapore, ace international correspondent for CNN, recipient of the International Women's Media Foundation 1994 Courage and Journalism Award. - Oh, wait, so, wait, are they cheering that she got the award or just cheering her in general? - Cheering both, just hey, good job all around. - Yeah, okay. - All right, all right. - Cheers and our only Cheers this week, by the way, yet again, to Saturday Night Live and more in sorrow than in mockery, last season was widely considered one of the 20 year olds shows worst ever, and yes, we tweaked it. Now it's off to another disastrous start for TV's once premiere, Sateric showcased with its first couple of shows playing as we said last season to embarrass tidders from the audience instead of laughs. Times like these virtually scream out for put-ons and put-downs, and we can sometimes find them over on Comedy Central, but on SNL, we have to settle for tired routines about flight attendants and poorly written sketches about the O.J. Simpson trial, not to mention a feeble shot at TV Guide, we're fair again, but can't you guys at least be smart about it? Even Simpson judge Lance Edo, a critic, he commented that Mike Myers' impression of him was quote, "Not bad, but ruled that Saturday Night Live "hasn't been funny for 10 years." Not true judge, it's had some terrific seasons, and that's why we'll keep on tweaking, hoping for a reversal. - Wow, it sounds like they just got a little chip on their shoulders. - That's what it sounds like to me too. - So you disagree with that, share? - Well, I'd have to know who's in the cast. - Chris Elliott, Michael McKeean, Laura Keitlinger. - Oh, I definitely disagree with this. Yeah, those guys are all great. I don't see how that could be bad. - Yeah, I enjoyed that season. Cheers to a simple but valuable improvement Fox has made in the NFL coverage, a small graphic in the upper left corner of the screen that displays the score. That was an innovation, a graphic displaying the score. You see, you have to check in all the time. Well, it was a simpler world then. - Yeah, I would agree with that. - I didn't like football, and I agree with that, share. And finally, cheers to CBS's ordering five additional episodes of new police drama under suspicion, and Fox's additional order of nine more installments of Mantis. - What was Mantis? - Mantis was, and it's M-period, A-period, N-period, T-period, N-period, S-period. It was sort of like night ratter, but it was about a guy in a special futuristic suit. - Yeah, I don't agree with that. Does this sound very good? - Fair enough, fair enough. Well, Tim Bargoulish, thank you so much for everything and doing the show. - Oh, thank you for having me. - Your welcome, pleasure. (upbeat music) - And there you go. I told you, that was Tim. He's a charming, strange dude. If you want to date Tim, feel free to email me at candidikenread.com and I will pass your information along to him. Also, email me if you have any questions. If you want to date anyone, I don't know. If I know them, I'll see if I can help you out. Go to our Facebook page and like us. It's a huge help, or you can rate the show on iTunes, review the show on iTunes, tell your friends about it. Anything you want to do to help the show, I will be forever in your debt. Make sure that you sign up for our email list. It's on thetvguidenscounselor.com website. You can sign up for that list. You'll hear about us coming to your town if we're doing any more live events, which hopefully we will. You'll hear about special episodes that get released on non- Wednesdays, contests, all kinds of fun things. So please do that when you have a moment and I'll see you again next time on TV guidance counseling. (upbeat music) - And I've actually recently made a list of every animal I've ever pet. I don't know if you've heard of aquatic ape theory. Monkey fish. - Missing links.