TV Guidance Counselor
TV Guidance Counselor Episode 30: Matt Knudsen
- Wait, you have a TV? - No, I just like to read the TV guide. Read the TV guide, you don't need a TV guide. ♪ Double visit, baby ♪ ♪ Double visit, baby ♪ ♪ Double visit, baby ♪ ♪ Ah ♪ (upbeat rock music) - Hello and welcome. It's Wednesday, which means it's time for an all new episode of TV guidance counselor. As always, I am Ken Reed, your TV guidance counselor. And my guest this week is comedian, actor Matt Knudson. If you don't know Matt, you've probably seen him in commercials or maybe on Conan. He's very, very funny. He has his own podcast called Grabbing Lunch, which is very fun, and if you haven't checked that out, you should definitely check it out. You can see him at mattknudson.com and see if he's coming to your town. I met Matt at the Bridgetown Comedy Festival a couple of years ago, and he's a really good guy. He's very funny, and this is a fun episode. I think we have a nice little conversation here. So please enjoy this week's episode of TV guidance counselor with my guest, Matt Knudson. (upbeat rock music) ♪ I am a TV savage ♪ ♪ I know what's going to disappear ♪ ♪ I am a TV savage ♪ ♪ I know what's going to disappear ♪ ♪ I am a TV savage ♪ ♪ I know what's going to disappear ♪ - Matt Knudson, how are you, sir? - I'm good, Ken. I'm so happy to be here. - Yes, thank you. - So happy to be guidanceed by your counselor. - You're welcome, you're welcome. I usually just charge for these services, but I've said, hey, you know what? I'm on the west coast, and I'm going to do a pro bono. - Sure, yeah, either that or charge Lucy rates, which I think it's five cents. - Yeah, five cents, and you get a glass of lemonade. Now, normally this is when I welcome people in my home, but I am squatting at Shane Moss's place here in lovely Malibu. - I just want to point out, I think it's only squatting if you're not a welcome to guest. - Oh yeah, they did invite me. - Okay, yeah, okay. - I think of squatting as like, oh, there's a burnt out building. - Hold on a second. - Does this mean my script for vampire squatters will not be logical? - That does not mean that at all. - It's not going to work? - It's just completely legit. - Okay, okay, because I thought that was really going to be my ticket to the big time. - Oh, and it is. - It's a good concept. - It is, there's no question about it. Your belief is all the proof you need. - Yes, that's all I need. That was the tag line for the movie, actually. That's what I had on the poster. I paid a guy to paint up. So you picked a TV guide from the week of April 19th to the 25th, 1986. What drew you to this particular issue? - Well, I have to say, it was the hunks on the cover. - That is right. So people can see this cover on the tumbler. It is the 10 most attractive men on TV. - Yes. - And this one actually also has the label still on it for who it was sent to. And it's somebody named Manning Cohen. - Who also sounds like quite a hunk. - Really a hunk. - So what is your name, a Manning Cohen, what do you do? - Just a hunk. Just do Manning Cohen. - Yeah. - That's what I do. - That's all I need to do. They pay me just to be Manning Cohen. - So I think the hunks, it's Tom Selleck. - Yep. - It's Don Johnson. - Don Johnson doing the classic sunglasses. - Oh my God, he's wearing like the pastel, but blazer, the Miami vice with this. - Rolled up sleeves, the parachute pants with no belt. - Oh yeah. - And Pierce Brosnan. - Pierce Brosnan. - Pierce Brosnan, the future James Bond himself. - Amazing. - I actually commented before we started recording, all those guys still relevant. - Yeah. - They're still pretty relevant. - And around. - Yeah, absolutely. - Got a handy tool. - Although Don Johnson, I haven't seen it in a while. Nash Bridges was kind of the last big thing that I remember him doing. - Yeah. Yeah. - I mean, last thing he was doing was Melanie Griffith. - That's true. - That's true. - Ooh. - It's hard to get cast in that. - The book's Melanie Griffith. - Yeah. - Let's see. - They're doing a cattle call for Melanie Griffith. Yeah. I loved his album Heartbeat. - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. - Hi Pete. - The video where he's got the camcorder and he's in Vietnam and wow. - It had it all. And it's too, it's like, it's an era when people use the word hunk. - Yes. - And it wasn't done ironically. - Correct. - It was like, you would see that word a lot. It's on the cover of People magazine. - Yeah. - And people who were TV stars are like, "Oh, you do this, you must also be able to do this." - Yeah, I am dancing. - I wonder if anyone's written a really academic dissertation about the genealogy of the term hunk because I think it just was sort of created in the mid 80s. I don't think it existed before that. Like where did that come from? - '86 to '89 was really the heyday of the word hunk. - Yeah, like just with the derivation, like it's from this dramatic, I have no idea what hunk comes from. Now I'm gonna have to do some research on hunk. - That'll be on the tumbler as well. - Yes, the tumbler will have a 48 page white paper on hunk. - Wow. - Now I'm right in, Saturday night, eight o'clock. What was your choice? - Well, Saturday night, I have a putting on the hits. - Putting on the hits, the world's best karaoke show. - On the hits, yes. - Do you remember with the all time winning song for putting on the hits was, the guy was the grand champion? - You know what, I don't remember it, but I wanna say, and it could be that I'm confusing this member with solid gold. - Solid gold. - Solid gold, yes. - But wasn't it the guy who did Half Man, Half Woman, and he did Lionel Richie and Diana Ross? - He was very popular, that was on putting on the hits. - That was putting on the hits. - So if people that don't know, putting on the hits was a karaoke show, except you only lip synced. So you just came out in lip synced to hits of the day, and sort of the wankier or bigger stage production that you had, you did better on that show. It was a syndicated show. - Wait a minute, it was lip synced. - It was lip synced, yes. - I know, that's when Millie Vanilli got their start. It was a huge controversy. All those songs went to number one, and it turned out they weren't even the real artist. - Yeah, it was the guy who did the Curly Shuffle. - Wow. - That was the grand champion putting on the hits song. - He lip synced the Curly Shuffle. - The Curly Shuffle. He would do the Curly spinning around on the ground dance. - Oh, well, why is Guy? - People couldn't get enough of it. - Wow. - Who couldn't get enough? - Including this guy, who picked it in his lineup. - Did you watch that every week? - Oh, I didn't watch it every week, but it was like one of those things, and I was gonna tell you, here was my, the big canutes and reveal. - Okay. - It only allowed to watch two hours of television a week. - Really? - A week? - A week. - A week. - So I had to, on Sunday, turn in the schedule of shows that I was going to be watching. - Really? - And then if my parents found me watching TV, and I was watching something that was not on my two hour-- - So it had to be approved? - Correct. - They would take, they would unplug the TV, and they would put it away for like a month. - Oh my God, are you an only child? - No, I have two older brothers and a younger sister, and we all had to turn in a-- - All heard the same rule. - Yeah, and they were a little loose in the sense of like, if my brother had riptide on. - Right. - And he was like watching this, like, well, I'm watching. - Yes, that was gonna be my next question. If you guys all got together to sort of pull your hours so that you could get in a little gray area going there. - Yeah, there was kind of a Venn diagram where there was a concentric circle where I could watch that. But then we'd also like, you know, go down, 'cause we had like the TV, this is in North Dakota. - Right. - Go like go sneak down and watch the TV of like S-C-TV. - Oh, yeah. - One in the morning. But it was one of those old black and white TVs where like when you turn it off, it's like shh, shh. And then the white dots in the middle. - Which is glowing so they would know you had it on. - Super warm. We were completely busted. And you open the door to the basement. It was like an unfinished basement. It was like exposed beams and stuff of like a little area. The whole thing was lit up. And then you see it go, you know, you hear the door open. - Shh. - Yeah. - 'Cause it's bright, dude dark. - What were you doing down there? Nothing. - Reading. (laughing) - It's the brightest light down there. It was really good for reading. - Yeah, that's scary. That's scary concept to me. Now, did you, were there any free choice things? Like, was it like an educational show that didn't count towards you two hours? Like, you know, like Weight Watchers. - No. - This is no points for fruit. - No. - No, no, I don't remember ever like wanting to watch something that wasn't like a show. - Right. - You know what I mean? - Was there? - This is Benson. - Yeah. - There's no educational value in this. - Right, your parents weren't like, you can watch as much Benson as you. - Right. (laughing) - They loved Robert Guillot. - Who doesn't love Robert Guillot? He was the best fan of the opera. (laughing) So, was there anything your parents watched that they would encourage you to watch with them? Or were they just not into TV? It sounds like they hated television. - No, they weren't big fans of TV. I mean, occasionally my dad would watch, you know, we used to live in Nebraska, so he was a Coron Huskers fan. So we'd watch a game. - Right. - But we didn't until, I think it was like in high school or something. We didn't even have like a color TV. - Really? - But the first time we got like a color TV, I was just like, "Well, I can't..." - This is amazing. - This is amazing. - And I would just like sit there and brush my teeth. I'm like, you know, - Were you like, "Benson is black?" - He's black. - Oh my God. - I love the show even more. - Yeah, you're cool, man. - Yeah. I don't really remember them watching any TV. They still don't watch TV now. - Did you have a set bedtime as well? Like you, I don't remember like lights out at night. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But I mean, there was definitely, it's like, "Hey, it's, you got school tomorrow, go to bed." - So with this limit on television, did you just kind of get used to it? And you're like, "That's the way it is." Or are you constantly trying to find loopholes? Like, were you going over friends houses after school? Did you sleep over a lot of places? - It was probably a little bit of that. But I honestly, where I grew up, there's kind of this, you know, the Midwest. And then even when I moved to California, I had friends and I would like go out and do stuff. - Right, you're an outdoorsy kind of guy. - I was an outdoorsy kid. I'd rather ride my bike than watch TV. - I mean, like, yes, that's healthy. - That's one way to go. - Sure, sure. - Yeah, but I don't remember, even now I don't really watch. There's a handful of shows that I watch. - Yeah. - But there's not like, well, it's eight o'clock, time for me to sit on the couch. - I gotta go in, I gotta go in. Yeah, I mean, but North Dakota, the winters must have been pretty brutal. - Pretty long. - So what are you doing in the house all day? Would you go out and actually play in the snow? Or are you just like shining it in your house? - Go out and play in the snow. - 'Cause also, too, it was like, it was like a kind of a small farming community. So in your neighborhood, this is when the kids had, you know, the families had like, there was eight kids. - Right. - And there was five kids. So you would just like go out. There was gangs of kids. So as long as like, the sun was out, people were out running around. And that was what you did. - In that world then, is it odd for you to now be in the industry and you work in television a lot and you work in all these things? How strange, how did you develop sort of a desire to do that if you weren't really watching a lot of it? It just kind of fell into it? - Honestly, I've said it before, but I never, like as a kid, thought like, one day I'm gonna be on TV. - Right, right, right. - It was just, I guess, through Osmosis, you are the guy who is maybe a little, has a little more levity in his, you know? And I remember like, watching Saturday Night Live and seeing Bill Murray and I was like, that guy is the coolest. - He's the guy. - He's the guy. And wanting to do it with that. But I had never, before moving to Los Angeles, taken an acting class or performed standup at all in my life. - You moved out here first. Oh, so why did you move out here then? If you hadn't, you weren't doing so-- - I wanted to do it. - Okay, so you wanted to do it. So you came out here and then you just started doing it. - Yeah, I just thought, well, you know what may as well, just move to the place that has the thing. - Right. - But when I first moved to LA, I worked for free as a PA on a bunch of productions and stunt films. - Right, right, yeah. - You did. - I did them before. - Yeah, extra work. - Yeah, you know. - Oh, absolutely. So, SCTV though, you watched. - Yes. - I mean, I love SCTV. That's one of my all-time favorites. It shows, I think it's much better than SNL, I have to say. - Yeah, I have to say, I watched some stuff on YouTube. And as big of a fan as I was, it doesn't hold up. - SCTV really, see, I re-watch it very frequently. - I think it does, I think, one thing SCTV does not do well is watching stuff as excerpts. Because one of the things that really set it apart from "Saturday Night 11" made it so great was the 90-minute episodes especially, had sort of a theme and a trajectory in the episode, and each thing sort of built on itself. So, just the sketches alone doesn't always sort of do them justice work. - Because SNL, you know, it's totally modular. It kind of doesn't matter at all. - I agree with it. Bill Oakley, who's a writer for "The Simpsons" just did a dissertation. I think it was like on "Split Sider" or something. I'm like, "Wow, how, like, SCTV was one of his favorites." And he's like talking about Count Floyd's pookey things. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - Like, he's a vampire, but he's still like, "Oh!" - Yeah, yeah, oh, it's so great. - Like, how it's a wall, you're like, "Oh, yeah, I didn't think about that." - And my favorite thing too is the day this hit me was that Count Floyd is Floyd Robertson, the newscaster. And they just had this world building that you didn't get on other shows. - I agree with that too. - It was very, and then how he subtly played Floyd Robertson as clearly a functional alcoholic who clearly was taken off the news desk 'cause he'd been drinking and so he had this Count Floyd job. But none of that was ever overtly said. It was just all kind of, you kind of picked it up by watching it a lot. And that was the kind of stuff that was just, just blew my mind as a kiddos. - And I think it was just the characters in and around television studios. - Yes, yeah. - And so that's how they made that world. And so of course, you know. - You can do anything with it. - Count Floyd needs to go get the cape from, you know, Doreen, who the, you know, costume designer would live in. - So great. And Martin Short did some of the most weird grotesque things on that show ever. And it was, it was amazing. - Martine Petit. - Petit Martine. - Did you know that's his real name? - No. - He's French-Canadian. - I didn't know that. - His real name is, is Martin Petit. - Small Martin. - So he changed it when he moved to America. He, he Americanized him. - Martin Short. - Martin Short. - That's part of the Martin Small. - Yeah. - I guess. - Small Martin Small. - When I was at the Montreal Comedy Falls Festival, like somebody just said, he was just kind of a passing up. - And the king. - Like, oh, Martin Short. - No, this is like Rosebud. This, this revelation has completely blown my mind. - I can't believe it. - I must say. - I must say. - Yes. - So, where are you going with it eight? - Put it on the hits. - Oh, that's right. - Put it on the hits. - Put it on the hits. And that's followed by Facts of Life. - Yes, Facts of Life. Now, I would always watch Put it on the Hits, I will say. And the kids spin off, Put it on the Kids. - Never saw it. - Which is an unfortunate title. - Right. - But it was the same show, but with children. - Right. - But I would have gone would give me a break at eight. 'Cause Put it on the hits was on usually, it was a syndicated show. So it was usually on a couple times on the weekend and I love giving me a break. This is a great episode. But Facts of Life. Absolutely. - You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have. - There you have the Facts of Life. This is 86. This is right when the show started getting in the sweet spot for me. - Oh yeah, I mean, this was the- - Over our head zero. - Oh, this is Mindy Cohen in the Golden Age. - Yep. - We got George Clooney. We got Chloris Leachman. - Chloris Leachman was not yet. Chloris Leachman was the next year. - I understand. - So Ms. Charlotte Ray. - Charlotte Ray had had enough. She was like, enough. I've been doing this seven years. I'm out of here. They replaced the with Chloris Leachman. - Well, you know. - Oh my girls. - Maybe you should think about the words you choose. - She was a bit like the mother gorg on Fragel Rock. I just thought she was based on Charlotte Ray. Never Fragel Rock did, but I believe the reference. - Yeah. - And there was always that moment in the episode like, Tony, maybe you should think about the choices you make where they say cue the French horns. - Yep. - Here comes Charlotte Ray's monologue. - Wisdom, here comes the wisdom. The Edna Garret's Home Spun Wisdom. And this is the conclusion of a two-parter and this one, the boutique is ready for the grand opening. This episode is actually called grand opening, which is not listed in the TV guide. I just know that. Which proves to be anything but grand. This is the over our heads grand opening, which they had Edna's Edibles, which burned down. - Yes, I remember. - They rebuilt it as probably the world's greatest Spencer gifts without the dildos, was essentially how I think the store went. - Which is why no one went there. - Exactly, exactly. And this was the two-parter where they had this whole new world and I was completely enthralled by that store. I've been spent my whole life trying to find that store basically, I just want to go there. - And if I'm not mistaken, it burned down and that's how they introduced George Clooney's character. - Correct. - There's a contractor who had been working in Iraq in Afghanistan. - Did not know that. - Yeah, he had been traveling the world. His father owned the hardware store across the street from where over our heads was in Peekskill, New York. - Wow. - And he built rings through the power of handsome. - The power of handsome. - Yes. - And weirdly, although we'll get to it later, he does not appear in this top 10 hunks list on TV guides. But he was in so many TV shows at this time. They just kept trying to put him in things. Nothing really clicked for him. - He was a total, just a TV actor for years and years. And a lot of people are surprised by that when they know that now. He was great on the show. He was very funny, great, wise-ass. - He was charismatic. And according to, I've never met him or hung out with him, class-act all the way. - Yeah, I've never heard a single bad thing about it. He just seems like a just a solid good down-to-earth dude who's always funny. - My friend writes for a variety and I think she had this story that she wanted an interview or something and he's like, "Oh, okay. Where do you live?" And he came over to her house with a bottle of wine. And that was the interview that he gave her. I was here hanging out of her place. - That's like winning a contest. - He completely won life. - Yeah. - And also too, why not do things on your terms when people... - Yeah, you're George Clooney. - You're George Clooney. - You could do whatever you want. He could be like, "I'll do the interview "if you meet me in the middle of the ocean on this boat. "You gotta get there yourself." And the people would do it. - Bring a latte. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yes sir, yes sir, yes sir. - And he's like, "No, I'll just come over." - Not come over. - Yeah, Pina Grigio, that alright, yeah. - It just seems like a solid dude. He won, he completely won. - Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. So nine o'clock, what are you going with? - I'm going with Remington Steel. - So this was a tough choice for you. Your first choice was Love Boat. - Yeah, you know, when I had to choose between Love Boat and Remington Steel, 'cause I do know the parameters two hours per evening, instead of per week. - Which I'm already expanding your viewing pleasure. The reparté between Pierce Brosnan and Stephanie Zimbalist. - Yes. - There was the Doris Roberts voice of reason component to it. - Yep. - I did like Love Boat too, but if it came down to it, Remington Steel felt more adults. - Yeah. - And that was an era for me where I wanted to be like a little more hit with it. - It was sophisticated. - It was sophisticated. - Yeah, and the other thing was too, by '86, this was the final season of Love Boat. It definitely was a little long in the tooth. It was a very '70s holdover show. So I think, you know, if it's 1986 and you want to feel edgy, Love Boat is not where you're going with. - Yeah, you're not looking to Bernie Capell. - No, no. And Remington Steel had a lot more action. - Agreed. - And there was also Ace, the photographer who was Ted McGinley. - Ted McGinley. - Ted McGinley. He, you should be the deathnal for all shows. - Yeah. - Yeah. - But great in a movie, Revenge of the Nerd's fantastic. - That's my part. - Yes, he was cast from a calendar, a hunk calendar, actually. He was in a calendar, Nola, I called the hunks of USC. - Oh, wow. - And that's how they cast him for Revenge of the Nerd's. Yeah. It was hunk central this year. - So he had like the Ashton Kutcher career. - Exactly. - You appear in a, yeah. - Yeah, as a marble. - And so maybe in this thing. But he's actually pretty funny. He's got some good timing and stuff, so it worked out. But just what you missed on Love Boat. - Oh, my God. - A director played by Ben Vereen, filming a musical, tries to keep his star, Juliet Prowse, happy at Doc's expense. Julie's pursued by the lookalike brother, Dean Jones, of a man she almost married. The captain falls for the mother of a self-doubting rock star played by Jimmy Osman on his first acting job, and Gopher and Isaac Promise a singer, played by Melba Moore, that they'll get her apart in the musical. - Wow. - That is star studded. - Agreed. It has it all. I mean, and plus under the direction of Gavin McLeod, he really kept that crew in line. - Absolutely. Speaking of S.C. TV, they were always brutal to Gavin McLeod. Joe Flaherty would do an impression of him, and they were just brutal to him. - Wow. - They always had him just going, "I'm just so lucky. Isn't this great?" Everything they would do, that's all they had him say, like variations of that. - Wow. - Yeah. Him and Jamie Farr, they were pretty mean to him. - And then there was always like the guests that got to, you know, eat at the captain's table. - Yes. Oh, yeah. Ben Green with the captain. I did love that Phil Silvers played his father. He was the captain's father. - Did not know that. - Yes. That was always great. So he made, you know, three or four guest appearances as Captain Steuben's father. - Wow. - And there was also, he was the guy. He was the Edna Garrett of the Love Boat. - Yeah. - And they went to him and he had that speech. - The wisdom. - Wisdom only male pattern baldness can be viewed. The humility of balding at 24. - It allows you to just have that sort of home spun wisdom, because you're not, you're not worrying about combing. - No. - And you have all that time in the day when you're not shampooing. - Yeah. If it's Vicki going to leave him because he's bald. - No. - He's the captain of the goddamn boat. He is the king there. Once they're in international waters, he could declare just, he could execute people. He can marry people. - Yeah. - Not even. - What's the difference? - That's true. - Whoa. He could do stand up on the boat if he wanted. No one's going to stop him. He's the captain. - He's the captain. - Look at the shoulder boards for guts. - Yeah. - Yeah. - He earned those. - He's a five-star general of captains. But for Remington Steel, what you watch that, this is the conclusion of a two-parter. - Okay. - Radical miners. - Uh-oh. - Already. That sounds like your college roommate's terrible band. - Yeah, spell miners. Just. - M-I-N-E-R-L-S. - Okay, okay. - Not O, yeah. - Okay, sure. - Radical miners. - Yeah. - All miners are radical. - Yeah. I wonder if anyone had a band like called Underage Miners, M-I-N-O-R-S or something like that. - I don't know. - It's not too late for us to put that outfit together. - Yeah, we could probably get a gig tonight on the beach somewhere with Radical miners. Mistake Steel for the Assassin hired by Daniel Chalmers. Here's an interesting. Played by Ephraim Zimbalist Jr. - Hello, hello. - I'm guessing related to Stephanie Zimbalist. - I got it. - To kill the Earl of Claridge. - Wow. - There's a lot more going on in that one. - Well, that's pretty aggressive. Especially if it's the Earl of Claridge. If it was the Earl of Worcestershire, it'd be a different story. - Well, when you involve Radical miners, they're going straight to the top. Ironically, because they're underground people, but they're really going straight to the top, those Radical miners. What makes... So, are their mining skills Radical? Like, they have really crazy... They're like, we don't use pickaxes now. We just blow shit up. - Yeah. - Which is... - We are Radical. - We're Strip miners. - Yeah. - We just hit everything with a hose. - We are very, very... I don't even know how... This is... My mind is just locked up on this Radical miners. - We might have to find the writer of the episode... - Yeah. - At some point, just like, now when you pitched it, you know... - Two words. - Yeah. - Radical miners. Done. Yeah, with an E. No, with an E. Or he came in dressed as one of the Radical miners. Like, he's got a pickax and like a neon green helmet with a lamp on it. And he's like, what am I? - Radical miner. - Huh? - Yeah. - It sounds like a really bad ninja turtles villain. - Dude. - Yeah. - And the first pitch was miners. - Pass! - Radical miners. - Hold on. - Yes. - They're radical. Or he just went in and goes, "Guys, Radical, don't even finish. Whatever you have to say next, we're doing it." - Plus, Radical itself is a very 1986 word. - Absolutely it is. - Radical! - What about Radical hunks? Too much. Too much. The world could not have... Not have held together if that was a thing. So, we're on Sunday night now. - Sunday night. - The Lord's night. - The Lord's night. And it was also the perfect night for watching. Steve in Spielberg's Amazing stories. - Amazing stories. - Was this something you watched at the time? - I did watch it at the time. And I was a fan of Spielberg, I still am. And I liked that it had these, I guess, non-connected stories. - Yeah, I mean it's an anthology show. Real A-list all the way. They always had A-list actors. It was unusual. A lot of them never did TV that would be in these episodes. - River Phoenix. - River Phoenix. - You would never do TV. You know, it's before the explorers. - Before he died. - Exactly. Before he died. - After he died though, he's on TV all the time. There's a whole channel. It's just a reality show. It's just on his grave 24 hours a day. And it's been pretty poor taste. - And it does better than most things. - Most things. - Yeah, than most things. - Amazing stories. - Amazing stories. So, I love the horror anthologies. And I was a huge Twilight Zone fan. And in the 80s, these had a big resurgence. So, there was the new Twilight Zone, which was actually very, very good. One of my favorite Twilight Zones ever was on that with Robert Klein in it. This thing called the word play. - They tried to reboot Twilight Zone in the early 2000s too. - Yes. With Forest Whitaker host. - Yes. And I remember I used to be a member of the crew. - Oh really? - I was a boom guy for years. And I worked on the Twilight Zone pilot. - Oh really? - Jeremy Piven. - What, do you remember what episode? They remade an old episode. I believe you remember what it was. - I don't know why you would. - Yeah. - I don't remember. - Were you a Twilight Zone fan? - No. I mean, I would watch the marathons when they came on. - Right. - But it wasn't like glued. - Right. - I don't know. - So with your two hours were you always like I have to watch a new show because an old show would be a waste of the time? - The, I remember I wanted, the two shows that I wanted to watch. Well this might, hold on. Spoiler alert. One of them was 18. - Right. Obviously. - And then Riptide. - Okay. - I like 18 and Riptide. - That's your two hours. So you went with quality rather than quantity. - I gotta make sure I get a bit more bang for my friend. - Fair enough. Those are the things kids talked out about at school all the time. They were like Riptide 18. We gotta talk about them. You kind of would have been left out if you didn't watch them. - I don't remember talking about TV with other kids. - Talking about farming. - Yeah. - I was talking about farming. - How's your dad's corn? - Yeah, it's pretty good. It's better than your dad's. - Yeah, it's high as an elephant's eye. - Yeah. - Thanks for asking. - Did you see children of the corn? - I did see children of the corn. - Was that accurate? - It was very accurate. - Yeah. - Actually the, the red had a guy. - Yes. - His name is. - Courtney Gaines. - Courtney Gaines. Yes. - They were playing games and music. It is forbidden. - Outlander. - Yeah, that's my, my Courtney Gaines impression. - Yeah, I did, when I first moved to town, I was a grip on a movie that he was in called Dreamers. - Okay. - With Courtney Gaines. I was like, Oh, it's, it's your, you know, the corn guy. - He's also the one in. - Very nice guy. - Yeah, he has heard he's a very nice guy. He's also the one in, can't find me, love it goes. You threw shit on my house. - Yeah. (laughing) - A classic. - Yeah. - The burbs. - Yes, he beat up the garbage in the burbs. - He beat up the garbage in the burbs. - Oh, hey, Pinocchio. Yeah. - That movie is so great. That is such a great movie. - It's a classic. Whatever happened to Tom Hanks? - I don't know. You know, he was a great TV actor and Wasnbuddy's was just groundbreaking and then he just disappeared. I don't know what happened to him. - Yay. - He might have a comeback. He's definitely not a hunk. - It's never up to you when your career is over. - Yeah. - That's a thing. - So amazing stories I watched, but I thought it was a little bit boring sometimes. It was almost to A-list and Spielberg definitely was a little too schmaltzy for me. Even at that age, like I remember the Twilight Zone movie that kicked the can episode in it that he did. I was four or five years old and I was just in the theater like bull shit, this is super boring. But this one is an okay one. This is Ghost Train, a grandfather played by Robert Blossoms, who is a fantastic old man actor, has grave misgivings about the new country home his sons have built for the family. It's on the site of a train accident that occurred 75 years before and spoiler the train does drive through the house. - I'm sorry. What kind of misgivings? - He has a grave misgivings, he wanted to make sure that there was an adjective about the misgivings. - Yes. Like if someone's like, all right, I see that they're misgivings, but if TV guy give me a little bit more information, maybe I would watch this. Yeah. Lucas Haas is in this episode. - Oh yeah. - From Roller Babies. - Oh sure. - Probably most likely. - He still pops up. - Yeah. - You see him all the time with his weird eyes. It's very strange. He's an incredibly depressing PBS movie called... - Downtown Abbey. - Downtown Abbey. - Downtown Abbey. - No, it was in the mid '80s when they were doing all the nuclear holocaust movies like Threads and The Day After. He was in this one that was made for PBS that was the most depressing one I've ever seen. And it was a, I wish I could remember the name of it, Testament was what it was called. And it's, he plays the kid in it and basically the bomb goes off like a hundred miles from these people's house and the movie is them all dying of radiation poisoning for two hours. That's it. Like in one room and they're all just like saying goodbye to each other for two hours. And Lucas Haas is like six years old and just like dying of radiation poison. And I'm like, do we really need to make that like, did people not know how bad that was that we just have to do that? And every time I see him in anything, I just picture him in this like bathtub like melting. - If the Russians love their children too. - Oh stinks. - Oh Gordon Sumner, can you change the world? - Dream of the blue turtles. - What an offensive song that is like, just the lyrics would be like, are they, like you might as well be like, I wonder if the Russians really eat their children like they say they do or whatever, they're just people, man. - How can we save our little boy from Oppenheimer's deadly toy? - It's true. Well, the beds are burning. - Wow. - I like how our references are always lost on each other. - Yeah. - Have you noticed that we're not making any connections at all. This podcast is going to be boring. - That's what I do. That's what I try to do. - Yeah, I never talk this deep reference with anyone. So the fact it's fun. - That's fun. - Yeah, it's amazing. - Yeah, I think it's a very strange character to me and I always remember this story. I was in England, I went there for school and some friends and I had seen Andy Sumner's from the police like walking down the street. So we were all on a train and it was like a four-seater train where like two people facing each other. - A couchett. - A couchett, is that what they're called? They changed his name to short when it moved to America. - Martine couchett. - Martine couchett. - And then at night, this is just a side story. I took the URL around Europe, you know, in like my 20s and if you do like an overnight rail, like if you're going from like Paris to wherever. - Per the pest. - You make sure and get the evening, you know, train that goes at like 11 o'clock and starts at like 6 a.m. Because those couchets, you can fold them into a bed and you can actually sleep somewhere without having to pay for a room. - That's pretty good. That's a good tip. That's a good tip. - For all you, your rail, if you're, well, we have a lot of listeners in Europe. So it was, we were in three of the seats and there was a stranger in the fourth seat. So we were talking about staying. - Billie Joel? - No. - It was the stranger. It was actually, he just killed an Arab. It was Jackson Brown and Billie Joel. - It was both of them. They kept, they were doing double shifts. They would tag out every now and then. So we're talking about staying and then we stopped talking about staying and about 10 minutes later, this stranger goes, "Sting is a master of tantric sex." And then we're like, "Okay." And he goes, "Yeah, I meant to say that earlier when you were talking about staying, but I forgot." - And of all the weird things to say too, yeah, he did not understand it. - I don't know. I didn't introduce himself with that line. - Yeah, yeah. - Especially when you're like talking about brownies. - Yeah. - What? - Oh. - Oh, is he? I guess that's true. Thank you. - That's the thing. When somebody gives you a microphone and you're famous, you can say anything that you want. You'll be like, "Well, I usually make love for four to six hours." - If I'm busy. - If I'm not busy saving the rainforest. - What do we need to do? - Do yoga saves the rainforest? He's like, "I can stretch and I just stretch and saved a million hours." - Yes. - That's what he does. - Love is the seventh wind. - Yes. - Eight thirty, what are you going with? - Well, for just the two hours, I had the amazing stories. That's one hour. - And Star Search. - Star Search. So you did pass up Alfred Hitchcock Presents, which was the revival of that show. But this episode has Buck Henry in it, who also wrote the script for this episode. So that's pretty good. - That was Star Search? - That was Star Search. Buck Henry's Star Search. - Judges, give it two and a half stars. - Oh, this one, Emma Sams is the guest star on Star Search tonight. - Oh, wow. - Pretty, pretty big deal. Mickey Gilly and Ed McMahon is the host, Ed McMahon from a little Massachusetts. - I did not know. - It's like everyone's grandfather where I grew up. - Yes. Yes. - I loved Star Search. - Loved it. - Me too. - How did you watch it though? At the time, if you only had the two hours, like when was it? - I guess I don't have an answer for that. - Yeah, you were sneaking. - I mean, maybe I made a guy. - Hopefully your parents aren't listening to this because they might. - It's too late. - Yeah. - They've already, they knew that I watched Star Search. - It was a, it was a show that was weirdly how America is today. Like Star Search just, America evolved into Star Search, basically, basically, without Ed McMahon's guidance. - No. Without Mickey Gilly. - Mickey Gilly? - Not on there. What was your favorite segment on Star Search? - I remember seeing comedians on there. I remember, like, like acrobatic, you know, dancers and that yeah, I thought that was, I thought that was pretty cool. - Do you remember when they would do the acting? They dropped it later. In the first two seasons, they had acting and they had a kid's one and an adult's one, male and female, and you had to do a scene and they'd have a guest star do the scene with you and it was almost always Tom Bosley. - Sure. - And so, they would do the scene and then the other person would do the same scene and it was really off-putting like someone's seeing the same scene with two different people. - Wow. - So they dropped it after, like, the second season. - One and a half stars. - One and a half stars. I always loved, my favorite thing was the, um, the dance scenes always had ridiculous names. - Right. - Radical minors, two and a half stars, three and a quarter stars. - Elder Barge. - Yes. - Four stars. You know, do you know the comedian John Roy? - Yes. - John Roy won Star Search. - Did he really? - This was not 1986. - In the '90s? - This was, yeah. - This was like his claim to fame, the one star search. - He must have not been up against Gucci Guy because he, Gucci Guy just slaughtered everybody. - Sure. - Yeah. - John Casier was robbed. - Rob. - Rob by Sinbad. - Completely robbed. - He was robbed by Radical Miners. - Radical Miners. - Yeah. - And that's another thing, too, where you lose, like, so subjective, you're just like, - Oh, yeah. - Well, here's his dancer and do you like him or the magician? - Right. - They're doing two completely separate things. - Oh, yeah. - They would come out and they'd be dancing to, like, Transylvania 6, 5,000. And then the next person's coming out dancing to, like, Darling Nicky. And it's a, those are not two things you couldn't compare. And it just, it wasn't like dance fever is what I'm saying. - Right, right. - You had no, you had no Adrian Smith, or no, to sort of just keep that thing down and just keep it grounded in reality. - Sure. - That's what he did. - Sure. - I also, obviously, particularly love the spokes models. How could you not? - Because what a ridiculous thing. - Absolutely. - You do for a living. Well, I'm glad you asked. - I'm a spokes model. - I'm a spokes model. - Oh, for what product? No product. - You tell me. - Just me. What do you need? And I'd love when they would let them throw to commercial. And it was the worst. - The worst. - Palmala. - Yes. - They're like, "We'll be right back on Star Search 88." And it was just like, you couldn't even do, wow, wow. - Line. - Star Search. - None of them went on to anything. There's no one who was like, you know, fun fact about her. She used to be a spokes model on Star Search. Comedians share, some of the singers, absolutely. None of the spokes models. - Yeah. - None of them. - Oh, Mickey Gilly. - Mickey Gilly. - You know, he's got that Gillies. One of those popular restaurants. - Gillies? - Gillies. - There was a chain of Gillies. It was like, they had... It was a-- - Fish restaurant. - Urban cowboy. - Oh, yes. - They hung out at Gillies and it was Mickey Gillies. - Oh, that's right. I don't know. It was actual Mickey Gillies place. - It is Mickey Gilly. - You ever ridden an electronic bull? - I have. - Yeah. - It was not fun. - Not a fan. - No, it was not really fun. - Do without it. - I don't think I'd want to ride a real bull or an electronic bull. Not my thing. - No, but growing up in North Dakota, we would go to the rodeo and stuff all the time. - Oh, really? - It was like a big... - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. - So you can literally say things aren't your first rodeo. - This is not my first rodeo. - Yeah. - I could, but it wouldn't be true. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I remember for kids, what you would do is they would like... You could actually go into the rodeo area. - Right. - And then they had a... I remember specifically, they had like a bow tied on to the tail of a calf and then they just let the little calf run around and the kids would chase after it. And then if you were able to get the bow off the calf's tail, you get to eat the calf, right? - But you got a belt buckle. - Oh, that's pretty good. You ever get a belt buckle? - I never did. I never got the... - Did you ever meet a rodeo clown? - I'm sure. - I would imagine. - You would know. You'd never know. - Right. - They're just among us. - I blocked that memory out. - Oh, yeah. - I always also, when people say this is my first rodeo, I always found that funny because it implies that two rodeos is all you need to be good at it. - Correct. - Like, I've done two rodeos, so I know everything about this. I'm like, "I'm guessing it's probably still difficult after two rodeos." Did you see that movie Eight Seconds with Jason Priestley? - No. - Oh, yes, I did. - Yeah, yeah. That was terrible. They really... There was like three competing rodeo movies that year. - Right. It's one where he gets AIDS and tries to find a cure, right? - Yes. - Oh, wait a minute. That's the Alistair. - The Renzo's Oil. - That's Jacob's Ladder. - Yes. - Yes, which is also odd. - Yes. - Jacob's Ladder. - Man, that movie just... That's one of the most disturbing movies I've ever seen. - It's a good movie. - It is very good. Elizabeth Peña, fantastic in that movie. That movie's a strange thing where there's so many comedians in that movie. You have Jason Alexander, Louis Black is in it, Kyle Gas is in it. It's very, very strange. - Yeah. - All these comics in that movie. One of my ever performed comedy in Los Angeles was at this place called The Theater of Note and it was during their 24-hour performance marathon and they needed to go from 10 p.m. or like 10 a.m. to 10 a.m. the next day. It was like a Friday to a Saturday. - Yeah. - So I had never performed stand up. I just told the producer of the show, I was like, "I'm a comedian." - How you doing? - And it was during the heyday of Kyle Gas and Jack Black, they were doing Tenacious D and I was on the bill with them technically, I was on the bill, but they went out at like 9 or 10 and I think I went out at like 3.30 in the morning, but I was still so free. I have the flyer. I have the thing, it's in my notebook at home and I'm like, "Oh yeah, we all have those kind of things." - Very nice. - Yeah. - And were you like, "Hey man, I know you're from Jacob's ladder." It's your finest work when you come in with the ice. - He does do it very well. He's very convincing. - Then you ask him if he remembers. - Remember that thing that you did? - Yeah. - He does that? - He is now. - It's Chris Farley. - Oh yes, yeah. You were in that thing. - He did Beatles? - Yes, I remember. - You weren't really dead. - That was awesome. - I love that. That was one of the best things that he did on that show. - Far and away. - Yeah. People always liked him for the physical stuff. Not my favorite things that he did. He was always very funny verbally. - That was awesome. - Yeah. - That was awesome. - Oh, stupid. Yeah. - On Monday night now. - Monday night. - The saddest night of the week. - Oh. I owe contrary mode. - See to me it is, because you had to go to school or work. - There was that. But you got to rush home and watch TV's bloopers and practical jokes. - Loved it. - Right? - Loved it. - It had it all. - It was my favorite. - Right. - And numerous appearances by Tom Bosley. - Yes. - When he wasn't doing the Star Search TV. - Yes. Well, at McMahon, both shows. - Yeah. - Yeah. - That's true. - Tom Bosley, Will Shreiner was on the show all the time. If you remember him. - Yeah. - I was a huge Will Shreiner fan. I used to watch the Will Shreiner show all the time because I knew him from TV's bloopers and practical jokes. - Wow. That's when NBC was counting on it. - It really was. Just one person. That's all they needed. - That's all he needed. - Then sell us silly cinemas. Those were part of it. And then this one scheduled. - Okay. - So they want to point out that this is just scheduled. It may be different. - But you never know what's going to happen. - Never know what's going to happen. Practical jokes on Heidi Bohe, who I don't know, and Michael Spoud of Hotel, I don't know either of them, and Lorna Luft. Also Ed McMahon's movie debut, Foreign Commercials, bloopers from Punky Brewster, and Bill Burns Animals. Comic Tom Driesin visits a convention for Die Hard Chicago Cubs fans. - Wow. Tom Driesin. - Tom Driesin. - Yeah. - They always would throw it to the set. - Yeah. - And it's like, George Gaines, you must have some real dish about Sherry Henderson, who is Punky's best friend. - Oh, that's Sherry Johnson. - Sherry Johnson. - Playing the character of Sherry Johnson. First and last name, the same. - Amazing. - Yeah. - Said it to the set, and it was almost a bygone era, where he just watched someone mess up a line. - Yeah. - And then it just... - That happens. - And they would, without fault, cut back to, not fault, but without fail, cut back to Dick Clark and Ed McMahon. - Oh, they couldn't believe it. Yeah. - Like George Gaines was like, "Pinky, oh geez, I mean Punky." And they're having, yeah, they can't believe it. - Oh, do you hear it? - I don't remember. Probably the funniest thing that I ever saw was on that show, and it was Jason Hervey. - Okay. - I don't know if you remember this. - I did. - Jason Hervey, who was the brother from-- - One of yours. - The Wonder Years. - Professional child Jerk. - Yes, who also was in Peewee's big adventure and took the bike and we care about it. - I was born! - I was born! - Oh! - And in a million commercials. - Yes. He was, him and Billy Zabka were like, kind of like, 80's Jerk kids. So they had a practical joke where Jason Hervey, like, I guess it was like an amateur artist or something. - I believe it. - And so he had some painting in his closet that his girlfriend brought out and entered into this art exhibit. - Fantastic. - And it was something that also, it was like a painting, but it also had like this red light bulb that was in it. So it was like the light bulb. - Oh, okay, mixed media! - It was a mixed media well put. So the light bulb was in the painting and she's like, I just, you know, I entered it and he's like, well! And so they brought him to the gallery, to the exhibit and apparently they had some marks that were set up to start a bidding war for Jason Hervey's art. And it was just like, so it got up into like the thousands and you just like see his face like, I'm quitting the one of yours. - I've got it. - And then they like plugged in the bulb and they flipped it on and the bulb exploded and it caught the painting on fire. - Nice. - And so he just watched his whole thing like all his money. - All his money. - My money. - Oh, I have to say this. - That's a really great idea. - It is a really good idea. - It's a really funny prank. - And I would love to see pranks. I would watch a show every week that were just pranks on Jason Hervey. I've never met him as sure he's a nice guy, but I just hated him so much as a kid. - How could you not, he was, he was set up, you know, he was no Olivia D'Abbo. - Who wasn't Olivia D'Abbo? I mean, her, I think her uncle wasn't Manfred Mann. - Really? - Yeah, he was blinded by the light. - Well, she didn't mention that when we dated several times. - Really? Yeah, she usually rings it up in the first date. That and Maryam D'Abbo. So my two favorite practical jokes they did was one, they literally played on Stevie Wonder. They did a practical joke on Stevie Wonder and made a note to say they didn't have to hide the cameras. - Right. - Like purposely mention that. And then they did one on Doug Henning, who fascinates me. - Nice, loving magic. - Oh, it's magic. Thank you. Like, what a weird guy. And he got really angry during it and they had his wife set him up. And what they did was they had her, they were in a furniture store and she was ripping all the tags off the mattresses and putting them in her purse. And so he was like, "What are you doing?" And she's like, "No, it's not magical." She goes, "I come down here all the time and I do this all the time. It's fine." Which is a really weird thing to do. Anyway, and he's like, "You're gonna get in trouble now?" And he was really freaking out. And then she got caught and they dump them all out of her purse. And Doug Henning is like just losing his mott like-- - Watch me disappear. - Yeah, he could not magic his way out of that. It was funny to see him angry. - Wow. Yeah. And they also, I remember they did one on the Oak Ridge Boys where they had publicists who was-- - Real viral. - Yeah, who had all this misinformation about the Oak Ridge Boys. And he was just trying to interview them. But everything that he said was like, "All right, now, which one of you was Grizzly Adams?" - Yeah. - And it was just-- - Where's Tito? - Yeah. - It's killer stuff. Yep. - Bring it back there. - But I think they were in separate ways because Dick Clark was more of a bloopers guy. - Yeah. - And then Ed McMahon was-- - Oh, he's a practical Joker if I ever met one. - Oil and water. - Yeah. - They just didn't go together. And I think Dick Clark was probably felt a little bit threatened by Ed McMahon's just rugged good looks. - I don't see how you could-- - Yeah. - And one of those old men that just was dead now. But seems like the one old man that would be really into that magnetic jewelry. - Oh. - You know what I mean? - Absolutely. - It helps me with my cheese. - Whatever he has. - My lower back pain. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I had a water. So nine o'clock. - I wouldn't use my CPAP machine anymore. - No. - Oh, this was a pleasant surprise. Monday at nine o'clock, the secret of Al Capone's vault with Aldo Rivera. - Yes. - Huge events. - Like I wasn't gonna watch that. - Huge events. - I watched that when it was on the-- - I did. - Yeah. - I did. I mean, they promoted this thing for what seemed like a full year. - Yeah. I think it heightened the embarrassment about what it was because of the level of promotion. - Absolutely. Absolutely. And there was no reason for them to do this live. - It was zero reason. - Zero reason. - It was no reason. And it was, I think it was a two-hour broadcast where it was just all what, let's speculate what could be in here, let's go through the history of Al Capone and then the last five minutes for people that don't know what should be surprising to me. But I'm sure there are people who don't remember this. They opened the vault and in the vault, nothing. - Nothing. - Nothing. - Not a thing. - Like papers or something. - Yeah. - Maybe some papers. But you think like there's gonna be confessions on tape and money and body and stuff. - Jimmy Hoffa, it was, I was embarrassed and I was a child. Jimmy Hoffa was embarrassed, it was like the, and everybody wanted to go to America. - America was. - The whole country. You just heard a groan, like nationwide, just everyone was like, "Ooh." I can't believe Geraldo had a career after that. Like that, who would have hired him after that? - You know when you like blow up a balloon and then you squeeze out that opening. - Yes. - That's what had heard. Just you could hear it from space, that's what it was. - You just heard four heads being slapped across America. A million people played trombones everywhere. - That was such a pleasant surprise to look on the schedule and see that. - This was a big week. - It was a big week for America. - An event. - It was an event. There were, I, you know, spoiler alert, there are no other events on my. - You couldn't have more than one event that caliber on the week. - No. - And it was, I mean, people use that as a reference for disappointing for a decade, a decade. Like there were, like, there were marriages that were probably like, "Well, it turned out to be Al Capone's vault, you know, like on the witness stand in divorce court and just people who were like sporting events were just like, "Well, they got a first round graph pick and he turned out being Al Capone's vault." That's what it was. Geraldo? - Very successful in the 90s. - Yeah. - Despite him? - He'd learn how to be inflammatory. - That's true. I think it was getting your nose broken by a Ku Klux Klan member. - I don't know what happened. We've got some Black Panthers and some KKK people and there was 10 cheers. - Start fighting. My favorite thing on that one, which I've actually re-watched that episode several times. And Geraldo gets really tough in it, which is hilarious. So this guy, this guy, Geraldo's real name apparently isn't Geraldo Rivera. It's like, it's, it's not a, it's like Jerry, Salomon or something. And so this skinhead's like, "Your name's not even Geraldo Rivera. You're a fake Hispanic." And Geraldo goes, "You listen to me punk." And he's like, "You tell me what my life is, I'm going to come over there and I will end you." - Wow. - And then he broke his nose. - Wow. - Yeah. - "You listen to me, punk." - I mean punk. - Oh, I said punk. Did I say punk? That's, oh, punk is Spanish for punk. I am very Hispanic. Geraldo Rivera. - Yes, Muy Guapo. - Muy Guapo. - Muy Guapo. - Yeah. I'm sure you saw the selfie scene around the world. - Yes. - Yeah. - I'm 58. I'm like, man. - Looking good. A lot of people are 58. - Many people are 58. All have clothes on. - Yeah. - Yeah, most of them do. - Yeah. - We're still talking about the vault. I don't care how many bar dips you do for Aldo. - No. No, I really think that he probably did that selfie just to be like, "Will you finally get over the vault? I'll show you something. Here's something." - And we're not. - We're not. - We're still talking about it. - I never will be. - Now I know I'm going to get a phone call from him this week. - Oh, sure. - Please. - He'll break up with you. - So you're watching that all night. I would have watched that. It would have had to. Normally on a Monday I'm going New Heart, Kate and Allie. But yeah. I mean, that was just the event. Tuesday night, 8 o'clock. What are you going with? - Oh, well, this was the reference before. We're going to go with the A-team. - Yeah. You have to watch it. And this is a really good episode. - Okay. - There's a very special guest there in this episode. - Hello. - George Gaines. - Hulk Hogan. - Whoa. - George French cuffs Gaines. He's just a guy that seems like if you, like he's your grandfather and you bottom a shirt that didn't have French cuffs, you'd lose his mind. These are not the shirts I wear with my mid Atlantic accents. - You know, I'm an American. - Yes. - No, I am American, but I wear French cuffs. - I'm a confirmed bachelor with an orphan that I took in. Yes. What's your point? - Confirmed bachelor. - Absolutely. - He managed to avoid the sexual advances of Mrs. Johnson and her James Brownian charms. I mean, come on. My wife and I always quote the episode of "Punky" where Alan gets kicked out of class for making jokes about the training dummy for CPR and Sherry gets locked in the fridge and he goes, "Alan, give her CPR!" And he goes, "I can't. I got kicked out of class." And then George Gaines goes, "I don't know of the procedure either." It's this huge moment, and it's very fun to say when you don't know something. But Hulk Hogan asks his old friend, B.A., which they feel the need to mention is Mr. T. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. B.A. - Oh, Mr. T. - Oh, okay. - Is that-- - This was also the era where Mr. T did like to cross over with the WWF, and so he was like his tag team partner, and it was a whole cross-pollination. - WrestleMania III, I believe, was the big Mr. T. year. Where the teams help against a mobster who's out to close down a youth hub-- this is the best part-- who's out to close down a youth club for no apparent reason, that's what it actually says. Like, the guy's walking in and being like, "It's youth club, I want to close it down." You know why? No reason. No apparent reason. - You see those youths, those two youths. God. - Yeah. - Did you say youths? Yeah, close it down. - I called them that for no apparent reason. - Right. - Yeah. And there's a character named Rocco in this episode, obviously. - Well, it was kind of implied when you said mobsters. - Mobsters. - There's got to be a Rocco. - And Vinny the Snitch. - Yeah. So, it's funny to me that Hulk Hogan's like, "Hey, brother, I need your help here, man. For no apparent reason, brother." - Yeah, I would have watched anything with Hulk Hogan at this point. - Oh, my God. So no holds barred. - Hey, brother. We got to fly to Tampa. First, drink this glass of warm milk. - There's no place where these kids can take their vitamins. - T, take these vitamins. - They're definitely not knock out pills. - Yeah, I went to WrestleMania this year, a friend of mine. - Really? - Yeah, well, not the thing. He like had a party and he ordered it and it was like, but it was like, it was watched in the way that you would think it was watched, but he would watch it. He was the host of it. - Hey, brother. - And he called it, it was like, I think the Superdome in New Orleans. - Okay. - And he like, he's like, "It's all going down at the Silverdome, everyone." And he said Silverdome like, three times. - Who's going to correct Hulk Hogan? - Everyone in the Superdome was like, "Superdome!" And we're yelling at him. And then like, the rock came out and Stone Cold Steve Austin, and they all were giving Hulk shit. They're like, "It's going to be in the Superdome." And he's still... - That's right. - You got me, brother. - He did it. - He did it. - He did your thing. Like, what's that? - He did on the entrance. - He did, and did he admit his mistake later in the episode? - Yeah, well, he did. He was like the host of the series. - Oh, right, right, right. - Yeah. - What do you think the likelihood is, in this 18 episode, that at some point during the episode, I'm thinking towards the climax, but maybe at any point, Hulk Hogan tears his own shot. - I would say... - It's just a percentage. - And the highest I can go is 100%. - Yes. - 100%. - I want 100%. - There's no no questions. - Absolutely happens. - My friend and I say, "NQAI." - No question about it. - Absolutely. - I thought you were going to say, "What are the chances of them building something that they use to prevail?" - Yes. - Yes. - Or maybe line to get something or get into somewhere. - What are the chances that George Bapart is going to appear as a character? - Yes. - And then once he agrees to take the job, he rips off the disguise and congratulates the people on hiring the 18. - Always a fake nose. - Oh. - I've heard nothing but terrible stories about him. - Oh, really? - Apparently the way he would introduce himself to everybody is with the following, "I'm George Bapart. I'm not a nice man." That's what he would say to everyone on a set. If you worked with him, he'd be like, "I'm not interested in being your friend. I don't talk to anyone on sets." - Wow. - And him and T behind the scenes were fighting big time on that show. - Really? - Yeah, Bapart was really pissed off that Mr. T was getting paid more than him. He's the reason the show is on. I mean, come on. - Mr. T or George Bapart? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Well, I just thought it was Dwight Schultz. So he was the one that really, yeah, after he was in Alone in the Dark, that movie was such a huge hit, they had to hire him. - Yeah. - And they were like, "Dwight Schultz is probably one of the biggest voiceover actors in Hollywood." - I'd believe it. - Yeah, right now. - He is. - Is him in Billy West or like the two? - In Billy West. He's up there. He probably, if you IMDB him today, Dwight Schultz is far and away the most successful person that was ever involved in that show. - I don't like, that's a nice story. I like that story. - Yeah, yeah. - Because he-- - Crash back! - Yes. - Right. - He always used to do one to grow on an NBC. They were always like, "I'm Dwight Schultz!" - Dare, dare, dare. - Which is weird, because his character was supposed to be a lunatic. And so if kids, who kind of, the line between the actor and the character is blurry in your kid, I'd be like, "Am I supposed to listen to the crazy person and what he told me not to cross the street without an adult? I don't understand. I'm very confused." - He's not wearing a blue hat. - Yeah. - Maybe he's not the same guy. - Yeah. - Mr. T officially legally changed his name to Mr. T. - Yes. - Yeah. - And then he had that, his only, I think, series after that. We had, remember, TNT. - TNT. - Yeah. - He was like a lawyer. He was like her leg man. - Yeah. Yeah. - Well, he had that cartoon series as well. - The cartoon series. - The cartoon series. - Yeah, with the T. With the T. So we're going, that was eight to nine and then nine o'clock we're going with. - Moonlining. - Moonlining is what a great show moonlining is. - Some WAPA night. - When a job that I had, they used to, when they'd have new employees, they'd make them read, they'd have the right fun facts. And they would make me read them at the company assembly because they heard I do comedy. - Of course you do. - And I would always read them and this one lady was like, oh, I'm a big fan of jazz. And I was like, who's your favorite jazz singer? And she's like, Al Giro. And I went from moonlighting. And then she goes, no, he didn't sing the moonlighting theme song. And I got into an argument with this woman at the company assembly about Al Giro doing moonlighting. And then like half the people were like, yes, he did. - And the other guy. - Yes, he did. We're like, no, he's a jazz singer. I'm like, he sang the theme to move. - Yeah. - And it was very, very awkward. - Wow. - Yeah. - Wow. - This was at the height of cool on moonlighting. And he has done stuff since then. But it was never, I always wanted to be his level of cool. - We have that smirkiness. - And that smirkiness. And I also remember too, like even as a kid watching it, when they were doing, they really kind of patented the talkover argument thing. - Yes. - You had to listen to either one to pay attention. And he would do a thing where he kind of like, it's not a sitcom, but he would still kind of like break the fourth wall and look at the camera. And we'd be like, Bruno. - Oh yeah. You know what you're doing. - Yeah. - And then he's like, oh, and I'm also going to be in these wine cooler ads at the time. - Bartles and James. - Yeah, Bartles and James. Yeah, he was just, he could do no wrong at that point. And then seamlessly moved into a movie career. - Yeah. - Where there were television actors at that time who I would have put money on, not as sure as Al Capone's vault or anything, but like, you know, John Larrickett. I would have been like, John Larrickett will be a big movie star. He's like, Carrie Grant or something. - Right. - But not Bruce Willis. - Or Don Johnson or any of these guys. - Agree. - So it was kind of shocking that he's still an extremely relevant movie star. - He's there. Just like all the guys in the cover of the magazine. - Exactly. Exactly. So yeah, moonlining all the time. All right. So Matt is actually has to go to a television audition. - Believe it or not. As we speak, I'm going to be on my way to Pepperdine University where they held the Battle of the Network Star. - Yes. Yes, they did. Yes. - That is. - So we were in the show at the Battle of the Network Star. The episodes have already come out at this point. When this was released, I was spoken to two people who were members of Battle of the Network Stars. - Wow. - Teams. And it was amazing. - Wow. - Wow. - I'm impressed. So I don't mean to cut it short. - No, we're going to lightning round through the rest of the week. - So 18 moonlining Tuesday. That's a lot. - Yeah. - Wednesday. That's perfect. Solid two hours of entertainment. - So Thursday night, what are you going with? - No, no. - Wednesday. - That was Tuesday night. - Yes. - Wednesday. You know, I couldn't. It was a little light for my Wednesday night. I went with Jeopardy. - Okay. - Fair enough. - You know, it's kind of a thinking man. - Yeah. - It's like going to school. - It is like going to school. You like learn something. And then if I ever got something above like the $600 question, I was like, oh. - I could get in college with this. Fuck S-A-T. Yeah. - So I went with Jeopardy. What was high with a heaven? - High with a heaven was Michael Landon as an angel who traveled around with his life partner. - His buddy. - Yes. Buddy played by, what was the act as? Victor French. - Victor French. - Yes. - You always wore the Oakland A's hat. - Always wore the Oakland A's hat. And they would just help people. - They would help people. - That's it. - And then at the end of the episode, after they resolved everything like, and there was always some divine intervention, Michael Landon would look to the skies as if it was like, thanks dad. - Thanks a lot. - Thanks a lot. - But do you never use powers? It was always like, you know, you're an angel. You could have solved this much more easily, much more quickly. - It was one of those, the powers been in your hands the whole time. - Yes, yes. - Dumbbells feather. - Dumbbells feather. So that's highwood of heaven. And then just a sentimental night gallery. - Love night gallery. Yep. Rod Serlings. Totally underrated version of anything that he did really holds up well. There's some truly chilling episodes of that. - I agree. - And I also recommend people buy the DVDs. Glero Del Toro does some commentaries on some of the episodes. Very, very good. Awesome show. - Amazing. Amazing. So that was my Wednesday. Thursday, I mean, it doesn't even need to be said. We're going with Simon and Simon. Which wouldn't be called Simon Squared. - No. - Yeah. - It's not the game Simon. - Not the game Simon. - It's two people playing Simon. It's a guy named Simon playing the game Simon. It's Gerald McRaney. - Gerald McRaney. - Mr. Delta Burke. - Parker Stevenson. - Parker Stevenson. - Oh, I just found out recently from a comedy colleague, Andre Hyland. Apparently like after Simon and Simon, Parker Stevenson was shot by his neighbor a couple of times. - That's horrific. - Over some dog issue. - That sometimes makes it sound like it happened more than once in separate occasions. - Separate game. - On a Monday and then two weeks later again. No, all at once. Yeah, over a dog issue. - If neighbor went to the hospital as he was recovered. - His neighbor was like, there's two Simons. We don't need both of them. That's horrific. - You're not the major dad would. - Yeah. Where's your mustache, Simon? - Ugh. - Yeah. So Simon and Simon, cheers. - Never met someone who didn't like cheers. - Ah, my. - I have two theories about television. - Okay. - One is that anyone who didn't buy a TV guide but got the free one from the newspaper, their family had a toaster oven, sure, not disproven yet and there's no one on earth who doesn't like cheers. - That's true. It's one of those ensemble comedies. And when I think about like, because I try and write and develop and pitch shows and stuff too, I always reference it as you knew the characters so well and had this affinity towards them. - Oh yeah. - Any one of them could carry the storyline and you weren't like, how come we're following norm? I want to see Sam. - There's no B character. - There's no B character. - It's a true ensemble that show. - Great, just like Taxi was and a great show. - Seinfeld, Simpsons, there's a handful of shows that any character can be the A story. - Yeah. - This was one of the- - Absolutely. - They knew what they were doing. - Absolutely. - Following cheers. - Come on, Night Court. - Love Night Court. - John Larrickett. - John Larrickett, fantastic, great ensemble cast. - Harry Anderson. - Harry Anderson. - I watched that show still to this day and absolutely love it. - Me too. - And by '86 they had solidified their classic cast with Marshall Warfield and Marky Post, it was great. - I realized this until recently, not that Brent Spiner and I hang out a tremendous amount. He's a colleague of mine. - He played a heck on that show. - Yeah. - He was the dumbest guy. - Yeah. - He probably did like 20 episodes. - Oh yeah, they were in a ton. No one ever recognizes that in that role. - Oh, yeah. - He's Marky Post. - He's more than just data. - He's more than just data. - Old yellow eyes himself. - Which is an album that he put out. - Is that true? - It's him singing jazz standards as data called Old Yellow Eyes. - Wow. - Yeah. - Absolutely. - Yeah, we'll put that up there. - Oh. - That's a clip. - So that's my Thursday night. - And then Friday night. - And then Friday night, again, I have to say, light night. - It was a light night except for the last one. So I'm doing the Webster, Mr. Belvedere. - Perfect. - Vlog, ABC. - Yeah. - Great at home. - Only for Alex Carris. - Yeah. - I only do Webster for Alex Carris. - Well, that's two sports former athletes and turned comedic actors. Back to back. Alex Carris and Bob Euchar. - I guess I didn't make that connection. - Yeah. - Yeah, Christopher Hewitt. - Yes. Well, he was a Golden Globes boxer. - Christopher Hewitt was-- - No. - No. - I would like to see you show with George Gaines and Christopher Hewitt playing rivals for a woman's affection. - I would like to see that show too. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Like just some love triangle. - Yeah. Christopher Hewitt is not here, really, she is. - No. - So remember they tried to replace him on Vece Island and it's just like, oh. - Very difficult. - Don't do a stock chemistry. - Yes. - Yes. - Very difficult. - Yeah. - And then I guess the showstopper would be a fall guy. Heather Thomas. Heather Thomas. Yeah. Who doesn't love Fall Guy? Thrown from a tall building. And he was able to anchor two amazing shows. - Agreed. Come on. - And he's the unknown stuntman that made Eastwood look so fine. - Yeah. - Which Eastwood always looking fine. - Right. - Still getting the stuntman in all the movies. - Absolutely. And didn't you want the Fall Guy's truck? - Yeah. - Who's like on lifts with the big tires? - Yeah. - And his house? Is that weird house he had? - Oh, yeah. - So if we have a quick minute, I'll quickly read you the top 10 most attractive men on TV circa 1986. - Great. And I'll make a growling sexual sound, a la Johnny Carson after they say their names. - Yes. Unless you disagree with them and then you can maybe do whatever they disagree with. - Okay. If it's been printed, I agree. - Yeah, that's right. Yeah. - So we have number 10, William Devane. Number nine, Jack Scalia. Number eight, Robert Yurick. Number seven, Bill Cosby. Yeah. - You got Tim Allen down that one, or maybe just like Tim Allen likes it. Number six, Pierce Brosnan, five Bruce Willis, four John Forsyth, three Robert Wagner. - RJ himself. - RJ himself. - Personal friend. - Two Tom Selick. - Oh. - Number one, no surprise here. - DJ. - Don Johnson. - Don Johnson. - Oh. - Damn good list. - Yeah. I mean, and that was just the height. - The height of Don Johnson, Phillip Michael Thomas, they had the speedboats, they were cops. - Unstoppable. - They played by their own rules. They were pastel. - Yeah. - They had big shoulders. - No socks. - There's no questions asked. - Yeah. - There were not traditional clothing that could contain the hunkiness of those gentlemen. - Nope. - Yeah. - And way to bring it back with the hunk. We hunk bookended. - We hunkended it. - We hunkended it. - Hunkends. Have you seen my hunkends? I got them an Ikea. - I'll send you a pic. - Yeah, they're great. - Yeah. - They hold up anything. Well, thanks Matt and good luck on your audition. - Take my pleasure. - Thank you, sir. - Yeah, I had a blast. Take care. - And there you have it. There's Matt Knudson. You can find him at medkennudson.com. He's got a new album out called American. It's actually called Matt Knudson American. He is in fact American in case he didn't pick up on that. And definitely pick that up and listen to his podcast, Grabbing Lunch, if you don't already. And as always, thank you for listening and getting this far in the episode. If you liked the show, which I presume you do, if you got this far, please continue to rate the show, review the show, five star reviews, four star reviews, whatever you want to do on iTunes. It's a huge help to help spread the word about the show and let people know, have new people check out the show, always trying to get people to check it out. Like us on Facebook, email me at kennudikenread.com with any of your concerns or questions. I'm happy to answer them. And I love hearing your feedback. It's one of the best things about doing the show is getting feedback from people who are outside of the Boston area in which I am currently trapped. So getting the word out far beyond the state is pretty exciting for me. So that's pretty much it. Next week, be sure to tune in on Wednesday for an all new episode of TV Guys. 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