AMDG: A Jesuit Podcast

How Beauty Heals at the Homeboy Art Academy with Fabian Debora

Most of our listeners have surely at least heard of Homeboy Industries, which is the largest gang intervention, rehab and re-entry program in the world. Founded in Los Angeles by the Jesuit priest Fr. Greg Boyle in 1988, Homeboy works with about 10,000 former gang members each year in dozens of different ways, from job training to tattoo removal to wraparound case management services. Fr. Greg recently received the Presidential Medal of Freedom for his pioneering work in this area. One of Homeboy’s initiatives that host Mike Jordan Laskey just learned about recently is the Homeboy Art Academy, which engages at-risk youth and adults in diverse forms of art as tools for healing and transformation. The art academy is the brainchild of today’s guest -- Fabian Debora, an accomplished visual artist and a former gang member himself. Fabian’s story is so powerful – full of trauma and despair and hope and beauty and community. Unlike most episodes of AMDG, this one isn’t a classic interview. We’re just going to let Fabian share his story with you. You don’t want to miss it. Fabian Debora: https://www.fabiandebora.com/ LA Times profile of Fabian in conjunction with his “Cara de Vago” exhibition: https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2024-03-15/fabian-debora-wants-you-to-see-the-light-of-gang-life-homeboy-industries Homeboy Art Academy: https://homeboyindustries.org/services/art-academy/ AMDG is a production of the Jesuit Media Lab, a project of the Jesuit Conference of Canada and the United States. AMDG theme music by Kevin Laskey. Other music in this episode includes “Cool Math” by AstroMouse, “Coastin” by CTrox, “Fat Cloud” by Marscott and “Dawn” by Nicolas G, licensed through Audiio.com. www.jesuits.org/ www.beajesuit.org/ twitter.com/jesuitnews facebook.com/Jesuits instagram.com/wearethejesuits youtube.com/societyofjesus www.jesuitmedialab.org/

Duration:: 33m
Broadcast on:: 03 Jul 2024
Audio Format:: mp3

(upbeat music) - From the Jesuit Media Lab, this is AMDG. I'm Mike Jordan-Lasky. I imagine most of our listeners have at least heard of Homeboy Industries, which is the largest gang intervention, rehab, and re-entry program in the world. Founded in Los Angeles by the Jesuit priest, Father Greg Boyle in 1988, Homeboy works with about 10,000 former gang members each year in dozens of different ways. From job training to tattoo removal to wraparound case management services. Father Greg recently received the Presidential Medal of Freedom for his pioneering work in this area. One of Homeboy's initiatives that I just learned about recently is the Homeboy Art Academy, which engages at-risk youth and adults in diverse forms of art as tools for healing and transformation. The Art Academy is the brainchild of Fabian D'Bora, an accomplished visual artist and a former gang member himself. When I got together with Fabian on Zoom recently, I asked him to share a bit about himself and he jumped right in and shared so much of his life story with me. His story is powerful, full of trauma and despair and hope and beauty and community. Unlike most episodes of AMDG, this one isn't a classic interview. I'm just going to let Fabian share his story with you. I'll come back a few times at transition points in the story, but I'm mostly going to stay out of the way. Okay, here's Fabian. My name is Fabian D'Bora and Fabian D'Bora. I'm originally from El Paso, Texas. I was born in 1975 in El Paso, Tejas and again, I'm being raised by those ancient Mexican traditions and being there in El Paso the first five years of my life is where I discovered lots of teachings from my grandparents and what it was like to be raised in a farm. My grandparents, they have farms, they raise chickens, rabbits and it was fun as a child to be running around that, you know, that little, that phrase and that type of environment. I used to go back and forth to Juarez, Mexico, which is the border town to El Paso, Texas as a young man with all my families from Juarez. And of course, you know, as we start to think about life and future, my mother and father decided they migrate to Los Angeles from El Paso, Texas for a bigger city, a greater opportunity. I always said that the love, the compassion, the understanding, and all the consoling that child needs was discovered in El Paso, Texas and being raised by his grandparents, my grandparents, et cetera. But we didn't realize that when we left El Paso, Texas, we were gonna come to a larger city and in this city, we call it Boyle Heights. And we ended up living in the housing projects. Now, I was about, I was five years old when we came here. It was 1980 when we arrived in Los Angeles. To the poorest community, there is a Boyle Heights in the housing projects. And in those projects during the '80s, you know, it was a pretty kind of rough terrain during that time, you know, it was a lot, what we would consider the decade of violence, the crackle pain epidemic, as well as the Ronnie King trials. It was a difficult environment to grow up in. Fabian's father felt desperate to provide for the family and he got involved in the illegal drum trade. Domestic violence soon followed. Young Fabian turned to art to help him survive. (gentle music) One thing that I had to come up with quickly was a coping mechanism and God had it before me. I think God, it's all per designed, you know, he blessed me with this gift of art. And I remember as a child, when I first discovered this gift, I will go and hide under a coffee table. Every time I die, I will come disrupt the household. I will go under a coffee table and I'll pick up my notebook and I'll begin to create my own worlds to escape my reality. That's when I found art to be more than just a gift or a technique or a talent. It was almost like my big brother that embraced me at the times of trials and tribulation. It was something that belonged to me and no one was gonna take away from myself. And eventually, through that gift of art, I found a sense of hope, a sense of peace, a sense of, well, self-worth. (soft music) And, you know, I went to Dolores Mission Catholic School which is right across the street from Dolores Mission Church. Now Father Greg Boyle did not come to the housing projects till 1986. That's when I first heard of Father Greg on the beach cruiser, the priest on the bike. By this time, I was at the Dolores Mission Catholic School. And now, when I was at school, you know, I was dealing with a lot of trauma in the household, domestic violence, abuse, neglect, abandonment, and my father in an out of incarceration, leaving a single mother in despair, having to carry that and dealing with my mother's disparity gets heavy after a while. So I would draw my life away. In school, they say, doing schoolwork, right? So I would go from like two plus two equals four, four plus four equals a drawing, get your ass to the principal's office. You're not to be drawing in class. So constantly being sent to the principal's office in elementary school, I was at least in Dolores Mission. And because of the fact that I left to drop, but really what I was doing is escaping my realities and everything that I was dealing with in the household, that was my way of coping and kept me from doing my actual schoolwork. In age grade, there was a teacher. And I remember I was just about to give my mom a glimpse of the dream, right? She's going to graduate Dolores Mission, end up in Salisian, and hopefully in Bosco, Tequinde. That was the ideal dream. But the reality is that the innocence was already fractured and robbed because of what took place at my young age in my household. And the teacher comes and he says to me, Fabian, you're not to be drawing in class. And I've been told this many times before from third grade, fourth grade, fifth grade, sixth grade. You know, all the great. So it was constant reminder of not to do what I love to do the most which was drawn. Which only created a sense of anger and resentment every time they would tell me not to do what I love to do, which was art. And the teacher comes and he says to me, "Do you not drawing class?" And then I say to him, "Why are you making a big deal out of this, bro?" Like, we're gonna graduate in two weeks, man. And you're embarrassing me in front of my colleagues and now my little colleagues are like, "Ooh, what are you gonna do now, fool?" So I remember first, he's challenging me. You're belittling me in front of my colleagues. Second, you're setting up the stage, man, and I'm about to perform. Keep this up so I continue to draw in classes I'm supposed to. Teacher comes, he startles me, grabs my artwork, puts it in front of me, he says, "Do not draw in class." (blows raspberry) Rip my artwork. And in that moment, when he did that, it reminded me of all the pain that I was, all the trauma, everything that I was coping through, it seemed to arise to the surface. It reminded me of my father. The difference was he was not my father and you don't get to do that, bro. So I get up and I grab a desk and I throw it at his ass, so boom. Now the teacher had high blood pressure. So he woke up throwing sugar levels throughout the day by eating lifesavers. He had a big jar on top of his desk. And when I threw the desk on him, he was like, "Baby, look like a little fish out of water, going through a combustion and bump coming out his mouth." And everybody like, "Ooh, what are you gonna do now, fool?" And I said, "Why don't you eat your lifesavers now, punk?" And my savior, life being the smartest that I've become. Sure enough, they grabbed me by the t-shirt, walked me over to the principal's office and Fabian is considered to be the bad kid. Fabian should have never throw the desk at the teacher, but not for ones that they told the teacher accountable for Fabian Fabian's hard work. But before they send their troubles away, the word they send them to, and that's when they walked me across the street to the Lord's mission. And I met Father Greg. I was about 10 years old at the time. And I remember when I met Father Greg, he goes, "What happened, son?" I said, "Well, there's full rim artwork "and who's gonna take that from me, but me?" And he goes, "Oh, Miho, I'm not gonna be able "to keep you in school. "You're going to get expelled. "You're gonna go to public school, "which I call the lions then." And then he says, "But before you leave, son, "I want you to do something for me." And I go, "What's that, Father Greg? "I want you to go home and draw me something." I was like, "What?" For the very first time, I wasn't being punished and penalized but what I love to do, which was art, Father Greg, in this case, saw me for me, recognized my gift and he returned it right back to me. And that in that moment, I realized now that Father Greg has, is now becoming a father figure. And from that point on, I had to go on my journey. Father Greg couldn't follow me throughout every day, but although he made a big impact in that moment of just seeing me for me, embracing my heart and doing the opposite of what the school system was doing at the time. And that brought me close to Father Greg. Fabian has never forgotten that first encounter with Father Greg, but his path to working at Homeboy Industries was not a smooth one. He fell into gang life and struggled with addiction and incarceration. Even as his struggles grew, he kept making art. (upbeat music) But I never love the sight of my gift from art, never. I always held on to regard as a one aspect of life. I was in, I held on to my gift of art. If I joined the gang, I would then pick up the tattoo machine and start beautifying my Homeboy's bodies. Graffiti, tattoos, sketching, always doing arts as I was young, no matter what I've been through, when I've gone through, I always held on to the gift. But Fabian almost threw his gift and everything else away. As he continued to struggle with addiction and mental illness, he was at risk of losing the love of his life, Elizabeth and their children. Fabian attempted suicide three times. Finally, he decided he needed to get help. His family helped him check in to rehab where he stayed for six months. And soon after he left rehab, he went to see Father Greg. - I remember every word that Father Greg would say to me as in the journey as he would walk with me when I was ready, whenever I was ready. He would never hire me at Homeboy because of my drug addiction. But he'd said, "The minute you deal with your drug problem, "I will give you a stepping stone "to get your life back on track." I remember that, I went to rehab. And I remember graduating and yearning to get back to Homeboy and look for Father Greg 'cause I have finished and accomplished what he asked me to do in a sense. So I go back to Homeboy in 2007 and I walk by his office. And this time, Father Greg runs out of his building. Boom, where you going, son? And I go, damn, gee, and he goes, "You always walk by my office and you never stop." I go, "But today, son, you close, son." I sit your ass down, you're next. So now I'm right there, all nervous, sitting down and waiting to be called in. So he calls me in, he goes, "Son, come on in, son." So I go into his office, he leans over, his glasses get foggy, and he starts to weep. And he goes, "Where you been, son?" And I said, "Well, I finally deal with Jasmine at Doogee." And he goes, "What was that?" I said, "They said that the minute I deal with my drug problem, "you will give me a step and start to get my life back on track." And then he saves. He leans back, rubs his forehead, looks at his watch, and he goes, "Damn, son, that took you some time." And I go, "I know, gee, but I did it." And then he says, "And I keep my promise, son. "You start Monday." I came in as a trainee, just like everybody at Homeboy. I start to work my way up. I asked Father Greg if it's possible that I can go back to school. Can I run the drug program there at Homeboy? He said, "You could do whatever it is you put your mind to, son." So I decided to go back to school. I became a state certified drug counselor by the Board of California, which made me then a director of substance abuse services and programming at Homeboy. But before that, I was made at the very first, one of the very first navigators to help Homeboys navigate their lives in the building, as we are now expanding and growing to a larger building. So gradually I started to work my way up. And in 2008, I picked up my pain brushes again. And I started to create art all over again. And that I started to see how art was bringing back my community of Boyle Heights and how I was now becoming part of a larger community in the arts, which I always wanted to be part of. I just couldn't embrace it because of my addiction and everything that I was encountering. Although, as I did that and my years at Homeboy, I was now helping others, guiding others in their drug addictions and also creating art. And then an idea came about it. And then I go, "Imagine Fabian, if you had an art school or if you had access to some art programming, when you were younger, would that have helped? Would that have derailed my life into staying on the right path?" And I thought about it and I said, "You know what? What if I built an art academy?" I think for me, that's about giving back and fulfilling the need and meeting the need or bridging the gap. And sure enough, in my community of Boyle Heights is that, you know, as minimal arts basis, you know, and the arts are a very expensive career path. And when you think about materials and everything else, so gradually a woman by the name of Sandra Quintana for some my vision, and she invested in me while at Homeboy, and she got me a building in downtown. And then she said, "What do you need?" I told her, "What I need?" And gradually we start building the academy, you know, and I start to try and bring it to Homeboy, bringing some of the homies. And, you know, I was like, I was trial and error in the beginning because I didn't have the full on support. It was just one woman. Eventually, I would speak the academy into existence. And after 10 years, you know, I got to a place in my life where I decided to leave Homeboy Industries. I've always wanted the academy to take place at Homeboy, but I also believed that I was either ahead of myself or timing was not on my side at the time. But I knew that I was making enough impact out there in the world, in the camps, the juvenile halls, the prisons, the parks and recreation centers. I said, "I think I have enough foundation to leave Homeboy and follow and my gut and my dream and my vision." So I did. I left after 10 years, you know, it was the saddest thing to do, but I knew it was the right thing to do as well. It's risky, but it's a risk well taken. After a year and a half later, they called me back. "Hey, Fabio, how do we bring you back to Homeboy Industries?" And I said, "Well, I mean, I don't see myself going back to do what I was doing." I actually, I was able to build an art academy. And the only way I see myself going back to Homeboy is if you adopt my art academy and plug it to Homeboy, I'm the founder and executive director, and this is what I will ask if you can meet my needs. And then let's do it. And sure enough, here I am, six years back at Homeboy under this capacity as a founder and executive director of the Homeboy Art Academy, which is a new entity of Homeboy Industries, and which is a great entity because now we're expanding. We're going from East LA back near to Homeboy Industries to a larger building. And so you can see now the importance at the power of the arts. And I would say that a lot of these stems from the time when Father Greg asked me to go home and draw him something, because when he said to me, "Go home and draw me something." I say today, "Oh, I did." And it's the Homeboy Art Academy, you know, that's the design. And so it just takes one person to believe in you and see you for who you are. And also, you know, the fact that I'm in clean and sober and in recovery and my art in itself, you know, we did a book called "Forgive Everyone and Everything," alongside with Father Greg. If you see how my artwork lives in this book, along with his quotes or some of his writings, I mean, it's a match made in him and it's powerful words with my powerful heart. It's just beautifully done. And it's about that, right? And so now I work here, I built the academy. I work with 18 and 25 year olds, young adults, formerly incarcerated, all gang involved, you, young men and women. And we try to provide all arts disciplines, like Mondays, for example, we'll have visual arts, Tuesdays we have healing circles, Indigenous traditional arts practices. Wednesdays we have music production and engineering alongside a podcast that they're building now. The Thursdays we have, Thursdays currently we have a thing called "The Heart of Healing," which is utilized in images to convey their messaging and through colleges and various other arts projects. And we also have theater improvisation on Fridays alongside virtual reality. And so they're learning how to code, create them worlds for the, you know, virtual reality and stuff in that way. So we also do pottery, a little bit of everything. And so that's the beauty. That's the beauty of the academy. And then we not only do we serve the young adults, but also the adults come here from Homeboy Industries. So we have the young adults, 18 and 25. And then we also serve or receive the Homeboy U3 Entry Center. They're 15 years old to 18 years old. And then the adults come in the evening from two to three, 45 from Homeboy, which are anywhere from 25 and over. So we do that daily here at the academy. And it's amazing to watch how much we've grown and how the arts have also helped and have added to also the work that we provide at Homeboy, you know, as a whole. Art is a form of prayer and meditation, bro. Like once you're in the process of creating art, you're already in a virtual prayer and meditation to something higher than yourself, right? And that's a lot about experience per se. So I think for me, art, when you see here, art brings a sense of peace. It allows folks to ground themselves, remove them from all external stressors, and it gives them the opportunity to redefine themselves. And if we utilize art symbolically, as a way that if we are to see folks in the work of art, then what we're finding and how do we redefine, how do we reimagine, how do we begin to reach faith regardless of where we come from. So everything we do here is intentional and you'd be surprised how many discoveries take place here on the daily. The fact that they even show up every day on time or even though it's scattered, but the fact that they show up to me, that's already a plus. And the fact that they share with me, this man is cool right here, man. I feel comfortable. I feel at ease every time I'm in this space. That in itself is a signifier of the strength of our community. Now, for me, it's always been part of secondary, healing as primary. - Hey, this is Mike and we'll get back to the show in just a second. I wanted to tell you about an awesome Jesuit organization with a global mission, American Jesuits International. Throughout Latin America, Africa, and Asia, the Jesuits have schools, health clinics, and social centers that respond to the urgent needs of their communities. American Jesuits International mobilizes individuals and institutions in the U.S. who are excited to support these projects. Two Jesuit NGOs, Majus Americas, and Jesuit Missions Incorporated are merging to become American Jesuits International. This is big news because it is the first time that the U.S. Jesuit provinces share a single international solidarity organization. If you want to learn more about the work of the Jesuits in the global south, or to join this international community of solidarity, check out their new website, americanjazuitsinternational.org. That's americanjazuitsinternational.org. Okay, now back to the show. (upbeat music) You'd be surprised there was kids here who never thought campaign, and then they're like, "Damn, bro." Like, this is not that bad after all, me, and I'm like, "No, I know, but you gotta give it your chance." They go, "Hey, fool, look, I wrote a song. "You want to hear it?" And now they show their song or their music with pride. And, you know, and it makes my heart smile because all it takes is someone to be able to walk with them, alongside them, and give them that opportunity to believe in themselves, right? So we love them until they learn to love themselves. We are the whole opposite of what the society makes them to be. They make one mistake. We don't kick them out. We don't fire people just like that. No, and that is what they expect. And so we flip the script and continue to walk alongside with them until they learn how to walk on their own, all that stuff. And it's mainly about companionship. It's about relationship, companionship, love, tenderness. You know, all that is what helps these young men and women start to flourish. And the arts does it very beautifully. The arts do it beautifully. What art does, it allows for the defenses to drop, which then opens the gate to a vulnerability, without them knowing that they're already in the process. Rather than individual one-on-one, because it's like, so tell me, how are you feeling this week? And how did you wake up this morning? Which is very, but in the arts, as we're creating, how was your weekend? I was good, Jean, they're drawing. And I was good, I was kegging on my mom, you know, hey, she said something nice to me this weekend. Oh, really? How was that? And then, is that how you shade? Yeah, yeah, you shade like this, or like a trail like that. Yeah, what does it say to you? And so, the dialogue's already happening and them not knowing because the art is allowing for the defenses to come down. As Fabian has founded and led the Homeboy Art Academy, he's also been growing as an artist himself. An exhibit of his work in Los Angeles this past spring was covered by the Los Angeles Times, and that's how I first learned about Fabian. The exhibit was called Cara de Vago, a Spanish phrase that means something like the face of the vagrant, and it's also a pun on the name of the artist Caravaggio. The paintings in this exhibition have a dramatic look and feel, reminiscent of the great Baroque Italian painter Caravaggio. But Fabian's subjects are all people he knows from Los Angeles. A local teenage girl stands in for the Virgin Mary. A masked indigenous warrior stands in for the Risen Christ. Fabian created the series out of a desire to bring the often marginalized members of his community to the center. Art is a responsibility for me, and I think I've learned to utilize the arts for building and transformation, but most importantly, as a form of advocacy and advocacy for the particular population that I come from, or at least, to help amplify the voices of those voiceless and utilize the images of the folks that I come to know and have the privilege to walk with, and shining light and putting them in different light, right? And so for me, as an artist, I have made a responsibility to help return the image of the game member. Back is to humanity by utilizing the four common themes of identity, culture, religion, and gender. Those are the four common themes that I utilize to convey messaging and reclaim narratives for this particular population. So in this case, Caravaggio was someone who was considered to be a now cast. He is a master painter, but he was also a thug, per se, someone who would get in trouble, who would be in the streets, a thug. I think he was also known for a murder case or something he did, but yet he found his spirituality through art. And there is no way you can deny his paintings, you know? He can feel the essence of God and those paintings, regardless of his past and what he's done. Art also is a form of redemption for him. And I think in those intersecting lines, except the murder part, but there was a lot of intersecting factors that called me to align myself with that image. And also to be able to utilize this Baroque and Renaissance style form of art to convey the images of my people, in a sense, my community, my people. When you look at Renaissance works of art, you know, it's very difficult for us to see ourselves in those images. And so I want to recreate that so that we can then see ourselves in these images as a form of re-grounding that Baroque form of art for our communities as in the homies and the homegirls that I work with. And so I was able to take some of his images and redefine them or redraw them or repaint them in the way that is speaking on behalf of the population that I serve, the homeboys and the homegirls. And when you think about Cara Vago, and you say Cara de Vago, Cara Vago, Cara de Vago, so Cara de Vago is the face of a wanderer, face of a vagabundo. And those are, that's, that's the name I revive. He thrives from my mother who would say, "I am equal." And it's Cara de Vago, which just means like you're not living pretty well right now. So I thought all that just compiled these amazing 13 paintings and intentionally they're 13 paintings because I say there is me and then there's my disciples. And the disciples are the people that I can come to work with. And every person in that, in those paintings is someone that I know and who's helping me to tell that story. So here I'm inviting religion to be part of the table in a way, right? There is no us and them. If we are to live in the image of God, then where do we begin? You know, is that kind of come, break bread with me? It's not the last supper. It's just inviting you to the table to bake bread. And that's the whole concept of this body of work is to be able to invite folks of various ethnicities, religions to come and see and recognize God and all people. And in this case, this works a part also for we are children of God. And there were some little controversy in the beginning, but that's what it's about. It wasn't to classify or to call people out. It was just to help us. For me, it's just about grounding us all into the image of God. And this body of work does it very well. Although sometimes it takes time for people to process, but it's done very well that it got the recognition from Los Angeles Times and it was a successful show. (upbeat music) As I listen to Fabian, tell me about the inspiration behind the Cara de Vago exhibition and his work at the Homeboy Art Academy, I kept thinking about that first meeting he had with Father Greg as a 10 year old kid. Fabian's art had gotten him in trouble, but Father Greg asked him to go draw him something. Fabian felt seen in that moment. He felt like an important person with a gift to offer the world. I think Fabian's work today is his own way of passing on Father Greg's invitation to the young men and women he's working with. Fabian wants them to feel valued and to feel like they have so much beauty they can contribute. He wants them to feel like he feels today. So Fabian keeps saying throughout all his work, "Make me something, make me something, make me something." (upbeat music) The minute that people who are human beings are being seen and heard, a lot of things can take place, 'cause often we are outcasts pushed away or ignored, especially where we come from at times in these environments due to the stressors, immigration, drugs, single mothers, all the complexity of what they have to carry, you know, here we make room and we invite them to feel the way a child or a young adult should be feeling at that age rather than living and survival constantly here. They move towards healthier ways of living and wellness and the arts provides that platform. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) AMDG is a production of the Jesuit Conference of Canada and the United States and recorded at our headquarters in Washington, DC. The show is edited by Marcus Bleach. Our theme music is by Kevin Lasky. The Jesuit Conference Communications Team is Marcus Bleach, Eric Clayton, Megan Leaps, Becky Sindelar and me. Connect with the Jesuits online at Jesuits.org, on Twitter at JesuitNews, Instagram at WeAreTheJesuits and Facebook.com/Jesuits. Sign up for weekly email reflections by visiting Jesuits.org/weekly. If you or someone you know might be called to discern a vocation with the Jesuits, connect with a Jesuit vocation promoter at beajazuit.org. Drop us an email with questions or comments at media@jesuits.org. You can subscribe to AMDG on iTunes, Spotify or wherever you listen to podcasts and as St. Ignatius of Leola may or may not have said, go and set the world on fire. (upbeat music) (gentle music) (gentle music)