ArchiveFM

Narcissism is on the rise and you need to learn how to spot it in other people and have tools to protect yourself. We all know those people who constantly turn a conversation toward themselves, who only call you when they want something, and who have a way of making everything someone else’s fault. Well, guess what? Turns out narcissism goes far beyond that. I’m telling you right now, even if you THINK you know what a narcissist is, you need to listen. I thought I knew, yet I’m still reeling from all my breakthrough moments. Do you have a narcissist in your life? Maybe you grew up with one. Maybe you work with one. Maybe you married one. Maybe you don’t know what the hell a narcissist is! Pull up a seat at the table with me because class is IN session. Narcissism is a term that gets thrown around a lot these days, so how do you know if you’re *really* dealing with a narcissist? You have been blowing up my email and DMs about this topic, so Dr. Ramani Durvasula is here to answer your questions. She’s the world’s leading expert on narcissism and someone I’ve followed and admired for years. I love how she breaks down the topic of narcissism in a way that’s understandable, simple, and packed with tools you can apply the second you learn them. Listen in as she shines a light on the REAL definition of a narcissist and the 5 warning signs you need to know if you’re dealing with one. This topic is so juicy – and so surprising – that you’re going to be shocked by what you learn. One part in particular will change how you approach narcissists in your life from this day forward. That’s exactly what happened to me. I have somebody in my life, a very prominent somebody, who absolutely displays narcissistic tendencies, and I have spent years in therapy dealing with it. So I actually got out of my chair and hugged Dr. Ramani after everything she taught me and you in this amazing episode! If you get something out of this episode, or if you have a friend that has struggled with a narcissist in their life, please share this with them. And if you think a person is a narcissist, don't even bother sharing, because if there's one thing you're going to learn: you don't want to EVER call one out… That's just one of the many rules you're going to learn to follow in order to protect yourself from narcissistic behavior. This episode is jam-packed with teachable moments that will leave you seeing the narcissists in your life with 20-20 insight. You’ll learn how to not only deal with them but also end this episode with the tools to heal. And that, my friend, could be the takeaway that changes your life forever. Xo Mel For full show notes, visit www.melrobbins.com
Duration
1h 16m
Broadcast on
20 Oct 2022
Audio Format
other

Narcissism is on the rise and you need to learn how to spot it in other people and have tools to protect yourself.

 

We all know those people who constantly turn a conversation toward themselves, who only call you when they want something, and who have a way of making everything someone else’s fault.

 

Well, guess what? Turns out narcissism goes far beyond that.

 

I’m telling you right now, even if you THINK you know what a narcissist is, you need to listen.

 

I thought I knew, yet I’m still reeling from all my breakthrough moments.

 

Do you have a narcissist in your life?

 

Maybe you grew up with one.

 

Maybe you work with one.

 

Maybe you married one.

 

Maybe you don’t know what the hell a narcissist is!

 

Pull up a seat at the table with me because class is IN session.

 

Narcissism is a term that gets thrown around a lot these days, so how do you know if you’re *really* dealing with a narcissist?

 

You have been blowing up my email and DMs about this topic, so Dr. Ramani Durvasula is here to answer your questions.

 

She’s the world’s leading expert on narcissism and someone I’ve followed and admired for years. I love how she breaks down the topic of narcissism in a way that’s understandable, simple, and packed with tools you can apply the second you learn them.

 

Listen in as she shines a light on the REAL definition of a narcissist and the 5 warning signs you need to know if you’re dealing with one.

 

This topic is so juicy – and so surprising – that you’re going to be shocked by what you learn. One part in particular will change how you approach narcissists in your life from this day forward.

 

That’s exactly what happened to me. I have somebody in my life, a very prominent somebody, who absolutely displays narcissistic tendencies, and I have spent years in therapy dealing with it. So I actually got out of my chair and hugged Dr. Ramani after everything she taught me and you in this amazing episode!

 

If you get something out of this episode, or if you have a friend that has struggled with a narcissist in their life, please share this with them.

 

And if you think a person is a narcissist, don't even bother sharing, because if there's one thing you're going to learn: you don't want to EVER call one out…

 

That's just one of the many rules you're going to learn to follow in order to protect yourself from narcissistic behavior.

 

This episode is jam-packed with teachable moments that will leave you seeing the narcissists in your life with 20-20 insight.

 

You’ll learn how to not only deal with them but also end this episode with the tools to heal.

 

And that, my friend, could be the takeaway that changes your life forever.

 

Xo Mel

 

For full show notes, visit www.melrobbins.com


Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Okay, picture this. You're halfway through a weekend project and you don't have the one thing you need. We'll let Lowe's make the run for you. My Lowe's rewards and my Lowe's pro rewards members get free same day delivery. Just place your order and Lowe's handles the rest. Members get more at Lowe's, twenty five dollar minimum and loyalty membership required. Order eligible items by two p.m. Subject to weight and size restrictions and availability. Terms at Lowe's dot com slash shipping terms. The Mel Robbins podcast is brought to you by Expedia. I love Expedia because I love traveling. And here's the thing. You may be holding off on booking a trip right now because you think you need the whole plan to come together. But guess what? You don't with Expedia's bundle and save the more you book, the more you can save. Get up to 30% off every time you add something and then you add more later Expedia. The one place you go to go places. Sign in to save on select bookings. The Mel Robbins podcast is proudly sponsored by Amica Insurance, our exclusive insurance partner. Now, maybe you're like me. Loyalty means something and Amica, they believe lasting relationships are built the same way with loyalty showing up for people again and again when they need you most. That's why customers stay with Amica three times longer. Trust takes time and you can trust Amica to be there in the moments that matter. Visit amica.com and get a quote today. Hey, it's Mal and welcome to the Mel Robbins podcast. Everyone, today we have a killer episode. What are we talking about? Only public enemy number one, narcissism. What I've done is I've brought on the world's leading expert on narcissism to talk about this topic with all of us because you know what? We have to hear about it. We got to understand it and most importantly, we got to know how to protect ourselves from it because here's the truth. Narcissism, it's everywhere. And so here's what I've done. I have asked a friend of mine, Dr. Romany, who happens to be the world's leading expert on the subject of narcissism. She is so fascinating to listen to because not only has she studied narcissism, been in academia for over 20 years teaching about it. She's a best-selling author. She's the host of the podcast Navigating Narcissism. And I am so excited for you to learn everything that she is about to teach us today. So without further ado, welcome, Dr. Romany. It's so good to see you and thank you. So what is narcissism? Narcissism is a person who has a lack of empathy and I'm going to talk about or performative empathy, which I'm going to get to in a minute. Okay, so but they have inconsistent or low empathy. They're very entitled. They're arrogant. They're egocentric. They're chronically validation and admiration-seeking. They need to be in control all the time. They are poorly emotionally regulated, prone to strong shows of rage. If they're frustrated or disappointed or aren't getting in their way, they're very easily provoked and very thin-skinned. If anyone gives some feedback or criticism, they just rage very quickly. They can't regulate themselves at those times. They're very pretentious. They tend to be very superficial. I mean, the list goes. It's that kind of stuff. Narcissism, I find to be an absolutely fascinating topic. I believe that when you understand what it is and what it isn't and when you have tools, all of a sudden, there is a light at the end of the tunnel that you're walking down and you realize you're not crazy. You're around somebody who's making you believe you are. Correct. That's beautifully put. And I agree with you in a way what it is. I'm hoping to give people a guide to what they're dealing with and not an accusatory, "You're bad. I'm good way." But in more of this may not be good for me. So let's start at the beginning because people are fascinated by the topic of narcissism. The word is now thrown around all the time. Okay. So I even want to go to step zero from step one here to say narcissism is not a diagnosis. Okay. Wait, what? It's not everyone's like, "Don't diagnose people." I'm like, okay. I roll up to someone. I said, "If I called you stubborn, would you tell me I'm diagnosing you?" They're like, "No. If I told you you were agreeable, would you tell me I'm diagnosing you?" No. Then why are you saying narcissism is a diagnosis when it's not? It is a personality style, just like agreeableness, just like introversion. All of those are personality styles. Nobody's getting themselves all the be in the bonnet when we see those other things. Wait a minute. I thought that this was like a diagnosis. See,

Transcription truncated.

Narcissism is on the rise and you need to learn how to spot it in other people and have tools to protect yourself. We all know those people who constantly turn a conversation toward themselves, who only call you when they want something, and who have a way of making everything someone else’s fault. Well, guess what? Turns out narcissism goes far beyond that. I’m telling you right now, even if you THINK you know what a narcissist is, you need to listen. I thought I knew, yet I’m still reeling from all my breakthrough moments. Do you have a narcissist in your life? Maybe you grew up with one. Maybe you work with one. Maybe you married one. Maybe you don’t know what the hell a narcissist is! Pull up a seat at the table with me because class is IN session. Narcissism is a term that gets thrown around a lot these days, so how do you know if you’re *really* dealing with a narcissist? You have been blowing up my email and DMs about this topic, so Dr. Ramani Durvasula is here to answer your questions. She’s the world’s leading expert on narcissism and someone I’ve followed and admired for years. I love how she breaks down the topic of narcissism in a way that’s understandable, simple, and packed with tools you can apply the second you learn them. Listen in as she shines a light on the REAL definition of a narcissist and the 5 warning signs you need to know if you’re dealing with one. This topic is so juicy – and so surprising – that you’re going to be shocked by what you learn. One part in particular will change how you approach narcissists in your life from this day forward. That’s exactly what happened to me. I have somebody in my life, a very prominent somebody, who absolutely displays narcissistic tendencies, and I have spent years in therapy dealing with it. So I actually got out of my chair and hugged Dr. Ramani after everything she taught me and you in this amazing episode! If you get something out of this episode, or if you have a friend that has struggled with a narcissist in their life, please share this with them. And if you think a person is a narcissist, don't even bother sharing, because if there's one thing you're going to learn: you don't want to EVER call one out… That's just one of the many rules you're going to learn to follow in order to protect yourself from narcissistic behavior. This episode is jam-packed with teachable moments that will leave you seeing the narcissists in your life with 20-20 insight. You’ll learn how to not only deal with them but also end this episode with the tools to heal. And that, my friend, could be the takeaway that changes your life forever. Xo Mel For full show notes, visit www.melrobbins.com