You 2.0: The Gift of Other People
Are you someone who strikes up a conversation with the person next to you on the train? Or do you keep your eyes fixed on your phone? Do you offer gratitude to friends and family? Or do you assume that they already know how you feel? This week, in the kickoff to our annual You 2.0 series, we talk with psychologist Nicholas Epley about our interactions with other people, and how we can make them more rewarding.
- Duration
- 52m
- Broadcast on
- 19 Aug 2024
- Audio Format
- other
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Are you someone who strikes up a conversation with the person next to you on the train? Or do you keep your eyes fixed on your phone? Do you offer gratitude to friends and family? Or do you assume that they already know how you feel? This week, in the kickoff to our annual You 2.0 series, we talk with psychologist Nicholas Epley about our interactions with other people, and how we can make them more rewarding.
If you enjoy today's episode, check out these classic Hidden Brain episodes:
Relationships 2.0: An Antidote to Loneliness
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This is Hidden Brain, I'm Shankar Vedanta. In the 1960s, Madison Avenue was trying to come up with a campaign for a major consumer brand. On a ranch in Wyoming, advertising executives discovered a cowboy, who seemed like a perfect fit. His name was Darryl Winfield, and he came across a tough, masculine, self-reliant. His face was soon plastied on billboards across America, Asia, and Africa. Ads showed him riding across rugged landscapes, often in silhouette. As violins played hauntingly in the background, the slogan on-screen read, The campaign to sell Marlborough cigarettes was one of the most effective in the history of advertising. It sold more than just tobacco products. It sold an image of the American West. In urban neighborhoods across the United States, and in crowded cities and poor villages around the world, it offered a seductive vision of independence, self-sufficiency, and freedom. The Marlborough man told two great lies. The first caused untold sickness, disease, and death. Cigarettes are responsible for millions of deaths from lung cancer, heart disease, and emphysema. But our story today is about the second great lie. The Marlborough man, and countless other media creations like it, suggests that our best lives are lived when we can be free of the cares, the concerns, and the constraints of other people. Today, we unpack how those themes have been woven into our lives, in the attitudes we have, and in the choices we make. It's also the start of our annual Summer Series, U2.0. As we do every year, we will share ideas and wisdom that can help you to thrive and to grow. Unlocking the science of meaningful relationships. This week on Hidden Brain. [Music] Support for Hidden Brain comes from Progressive. Whoever says saving money is hard, doesn't know that new customers who bundle and save with Progressive save hundreds. Because switching your home and auto insurance is better than cutting down on those iced lattes you love. Switch to Progressive and see if you could save. Get your quote today at Progressive.com, Progressive Casualty Insurance Company, affiliates, and other insurers. Not available in all states. Psychologists and social scientists have wrestled with the themes of connection and independence for decades. Human beings need one another and crave friendship and social approval. But we also value solitude, silence, and being left alone in peace. At the University of Chicago, psychologist Nicholas Epley has spent many years thinking about this tension. He has come up with innovative ways we can be the best version of ourselves. Nick Epley, welcome to Hidden Brain. Thanks Sean Carr, great to be here. Make you live on the outskirts of Chicago and you take a long train ride into the city to go to work every day. For years you followed an unvarying protocol on the train. What did you do? Oh, I just sat there and ignored everybody. I'd read a book, I'd listen to music, I'd scroll through my phone, looking at the news. The kind of thing that everybody else does. Sit down and you leave other people alone. So, one morning many years ago you stepped onto the train as usual, but something struck you for the first time. What did you find yourself thinking about that, Danny? Yeah, I remember this day like a lightning bolt to the brain. I actually had been on that particular day writing a chapter describing how we're made happier and healthier by reaching out and connecting with others by being social. And yet I kind of looked up that morning and realized for the first time it just kind of hit me that here we are highly social creatures with brains uniquely adapted for connecting to the minds of others. And yet we're all sitting here ignoring each other and that struck me as bizarre.
Transcription truncated.
Are you someone who strikes up a conversation with the person next to you on the train? Or do you keep your eyes fixed on your phone? Do you offer gratitude to friends and family? Or do you assume that they already know how you feel? This week, in the kickoff to our annual You 2.0 series, we talk with psychologist Nicholas Epley about our interactions with other people, and how we can make them more rewarding.