85: Poultry Slam 1997
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The argument is simple. Why have an eagle is your national bird? The eagle is a bird of bad moral character. He does not get his living, honestly. He sits on a tree branch, watches other birds swoop down for fish. Once they grab the fish, the eagle chases them, steals the fish. Also, he's a coward. At least, that is the argument that Benjamin Franklin lays out in a letter dated January 26, 1784. It would be far better if the symbol of the new United States of America were a turkey. Franklin writes, quote, "The turkey is in comparison a much more respectable bird and with all a true original native of America. Eagles have been found in all countries, but the turkey was peculiar to ours. He is, besides, though a little vain and silly, a bird of courage and would not hesitate to attack a grenadier of the British guards who should presume to invade his farmyard with a red coat on." Modern American reads this and thinks, "Bird of courage." "Well, you know, the wild turkey of the 18th century was very different from the butterball turkey of Thanksgiving date dinner." That's Jack Hidd. He is one of our contributing editors here at This American Life. He's written about the Benjamin Franklin Papers in the New York Times, writes about history, biology, and pretty much anything else he wants to in various national magazines in the effort to explain this turkey mystery. If you look at the label of a wild turkey bottle, you're probably closer to Ben Franklin's turkey than the one in the grocery store. You know, it's all leg, it's fast, it's speedy, it's a, it's a, it's an athletic bird, it has almost no breast whatsoever. And it's, if you've ever, you know, hunted them, they, they're incredibly quick and smart. Whereas, you know, over the centuries, the turkey was eventually bred into this enormous walking piece of breast meat. The turkey itself is so front heavy, I think in some cases even have trouble walking towards the end. You're saying that we as a nation have altered the turkey, but with a smart, fast, cunning animal into a stupid, heavy one. What we've done really is just hybridize it to the point where it's just basically a, a living dinner waiting to get on the table. There's really nothing about the turkey from its birth until its death. It isn't about anything except being a meal. And you know, that is the thing about poultry, they're probably more than any other animal. We have turned birds, chicken, turkey into what we want them to be. Which means that chickens and turkeys, more than other animals, are a mirror of ourselves, of our desires, of our needs. When we tell stories about poultry, we are telling stories about ourselves. And given this, and given the history of the turkey in America, maybe Benjamin Franklin was right. Maybe it should be the symbol of our nation. In a way, it, it, it begs the metaphor. I mean, he's saying that this should be the symbol of our country. I wonder if maybe it should, depending on what you think of the United States of America.
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