The Empathy Gym
Some people are good at putting themselves in another person's shoes. Others may struggle to relate. But psychologist Jamil Zaki argues that empathy isn't a fixed trait. This week, we revisit a favorite episode about how to exercise our empathy muscles. Then, Leslie John answers listener questions about the benefits of opening up to others, in our latest installment of Your Questions Answered.
- Duration
- 1h 35m
- Broadcast on
- 18 May 2026
- Audio Format
- other
This episode appears to contain dynamically inserted ads. Transcript timestamps may be approximate.
Some people are good at putting themselves in another person's shoes. Others may struggle to relate. But psychologist Jamil Zaki argues that empathy isn't a fixed trait. This week, we revisit a favorite episode about how to exercise our empathy muscles. Then, Leslie John answers listener questions about the benefits of opening up to others, in our latest installment of Your Questions Answered.
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This is Hidden Brain. I'm Shankar Vedanta. In May 2007, an artist living in Chicago moved into a new place. It was a small room with white walls. The interior design was minimalist. There was a bed, a desk, a computer, a lamp and a paintball gun. A fix to the gun was a webcam. It live streamed the room to the internet. Anyone could look in and anyone could take control of the gun, aim and fire. At all hours of the day and night, the paintball gun would spring to life and begin shooting yellow pellets into the room. Some hit the walls or the furniture. Some hit the artist. I was shot at 70,000 times and I received 80 million hits on the internet from 128 countries. Wafa Bilal spent one whole month in the room, targeted tens of thousands of times by random strangers around the world. Why would he choose to do this? Wafa was born and raised in Iraq. He came to the US in the early 90s. I live this duality of living in two places. One is a comfort zone of the United States and the other one is the conflict zone in Iraq where my family and friends live. In 2004, Wafa says one of his brothers was killed in an airstrike. One of my brother, Haji, was killed in air to ground a missile and I didn't know what to do. Wafa is a performance artist and he wanted to engage others in the conversation that was running through his mind. Three years after his brother's death, he got an idea. I said I want to lock myself in the gallery space for 30 days and I can build a robot connected to the internet and the robot shoots a pinball and viewers online could direct that gun and shoot at me. It's day 16. My body is just getting weak by the day. I thought I thought I felt better. As the days went by, Wafa started to feel crushed by the experience. It's late how night feel extremely tired but I'm afraid to go to bed. In some ways, Wafa was attempting to do what civil disobedience movements around the world have done. He was deliberately putting himself in harm's way in order to draw attention to a problem and affect change. I have United States, I have Denmark, I have Ireland, I have the UK, I have France again, Canada so it's not one place. It is almost a global shooting and I don't know. Somebody said imagine an entire nation living like this. Why did strangers who knew nothing about Wafa take it upon themselves to hurt him? Do technology in modern life and the anonymity they offer make us less caring as human beings? On today's show, building empathy in a connected and confrontational world. Support for Hidden Brain comes from Pacific Life Insurance. You make promises throughout your life. For nearly 160 years, Pacific Life has been helping you keep them by protecting those who matter most. Pacific Life, the power of a promise. Ask a financial professional how Pacific Life can help you create a more confident financial future. Pacific Life Insurance Company, Omaha, Nebraska and in New York, Pacific Life and Inuity, Phoenix, Arizona. Support for Hidden Brain comes from Defender. Even the boldest journey starts small with a single decision to go somewhere new. The Defender 110 is a vehicle built for those moments for drivers capable of great things, whether they're headed toward uncharted territory or just a weekend away. The Defender 110 combines on-road presence with off-road capability. It looks tough because it is with an exterior engineered for durability. Inside, capability meets comfort with seating for five and the option for seven plus refined finishes and thoughtful design. It's also packed with intuitive tech like 3D surround cameras with clear side ground view to help you navigate rough terrain and the next generation PIVI Pro infotainment system designed to keep you informed, connected and in control no matter the path. The Defender 110 is naturally capable, expedition ready and built for those ready to move forward. Explore the Defender 110 at LandroverUSA.com. Your goals don't adhere to a template. At Mariner, your wealth strategy starts with you, your ambitions, your legacy. You're ready for Mariner. Take your next step at Mariner.com. Investment Advisory Services offered through Mariner LLC, an SEC registered investment advisor. Jamil Zaki is a psychologist at Stanford University. He's the author of the book The War for Kindness, building empathy in a fractured world. Jamil, welcome to Hidden Brain.
Transcription truncated.
Some people are good at putting themselves in another person's shoes. Others may struggle to relate. But psychologist Jamil Zaki argues that empathy isn't a fixed trait. This week, we revisit a favorite episode about how to exercise our empathy muscles. Then, Leslie John answers listener questions about the benefits of opening up to others, in our latest installment of Your Questions Answered.