Best Friends and Life Partners
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What was the biggest thing that changed for you this year? We’ll go first: our host Ayesha Rascoe bought a house with her best friend! Now the two of them are living together and platonically coparenting five kids under the same roof. The seed of this idea actually came from a conversation Ayesha had last year, when she sat down with NPR producer and editor Rhaina Cohen to talk about her book, "The Other Significant Others: Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center." In the book, Rhaina shares stories about friends who own homes together, raise kids with each other, and care for each other in old age. At the end of the year, when so many of us are reflecting on personal milestones and relationships, we’re sharing Ayesha and Rhaina’s conversation again. Because so much is possible when you choose to put friendship at the center of your life.
This interview originally aired on February 11, 2024.
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This interview originally aired on February 11, 2024.
See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for sponsorship and to manage your podcast sponsorship preferences.
NPR Privacy Policy
I'm Aisha Roscoe and this is a Sunday story from up first where we go beyond the news of the day to bring you one big story. At the end of the year, I always like to kind of look back on the year that was and think about those things that happen that I'm happy about and those things that I want to leave in the old year and not bring it to the new. This year, I have some really great things that happened to me and one of the best things that happened was I bought a house with my best friend. Who's a jacket is this? McKenna, is this your jacket? Can you come get your jacket? And now we are living together with my three kids and her two kids and we are a platonic-ly co-parenting and really living this blended family life. Some people say, "Is it like the Brady Bunch?" Well, a little bit because it really is a blended family. We get up in the morning, we get the kids ready, Jasmine takes them to school during the day, me and Jasmine are working, I usually do the pickups with the kids and then I get dinner started. Jasmine helps with the homework and she also does the craft projects which is very important because I don't like to do crafts. And the kids, generally what they're doing when they're all together is they are screaming and yelling and pushing each other and hugging each other. And playing and being nice and then being mean and then complaining and then going to do basically like siblings. So, they do all sorts of things. They do makeovers on each other, that has happened so it's a lot of fun seeing the kids really enjoying each other and growing up with each other. Well, our lovely, lovely mother will help us cool. So, the seat of this idea was planted back in 2024. Both me and Jasmine had started talking about the possibility of us moving in together. We were both recently divorced and we realized we needed help. It's very hard doing this by yourself. So, why don't we try to, you know, be each other's support. And right around that time, we did an episode right here on the Sunday Story with Reina Cohen, a producer and editor here at NPR about her book called The Other Significant Others. In the book, Reina documents friends who also own their homes together and raise kids together. They even care for each other in old age. And in a lot of ways, they're far more than friends, they're life partners. And I remember kind of leaning over to Reina during that time and saying, "Hey, you know, me and my best friend are thinking about this too." And, you know, here now more than a year later, we've made it happen. That's my life now. I wanted to share that conversation today because I think it really shows how it can expand your life when you allow your friends to be at the center. So, that conversation with Reina after the break, stay with us. Stay tuned for the following announcements and messages from our sponsors. This message comes from Mitty Health. Most women never get real answers about their hormonal health. Mitty is changing that with virtual care covered by most major insurances. Understand your hormones. Visit JoinMitty.com to book your first visit today. This message comes from Schwab. At Schwab, you can get everything from self-directed investing to full service wealth management all in one place. No matter your investing goal, life stage, amount to invest, or know how, you can invest your way with Schwab. This message comes from BetterHelp. Your brain has limited storage, so why is it still holding on to that embarrassing moment from years ago? BetterHelp is an online therapy platform that gives you space to talk about what's taking up too much of yours. BetterHelp is now in network with more than 125 health plans, with many co-pays as low as $15 for eligible members. And if you don't have eligible insurance, you can still get 20% off your first month. Visit BetterHelp.com/NPR. Cost and coverage may vary. Discount cannot be combined with insurance. I'm here with producer and author, Raina Cohen. Raina, thank you for joining us. And you're on this side of the mic, you know, so no longer behind the scenes. Reading these stories, you know, it made me think of my best friend, Jasmine. We met as students at Howard University, but we weren't tight then. We really got close when we ended up working at the same job shortly after college. And that was at a point where I was also in this transition where I had a significant other, but I didn't have someone to just hang out with, like who wasn't him. And our romantic partner is great, but they can't fulfill everything for you. And that's when I reached out to Jasmine and was like, "Why don't we go work out?" and stuff like that. And we would go work out, child, and then we'd go eat some pizza afterwards. We were horrible. Oh, it's quite a combo. Yeah, so we would do stuff like that. And ever since then, we've become completely inseparable. And what I value so much about this relationship with Jasmine is that she has always been there for me. And I hope that I've always been there for her. So yes, this is what to me, I absolutely can see how someone in your life who is not, you know, you're not related to them and they're not your romantic partner can really be someone you can build a life around. I think one of the most kind of beautiful parts of working on the book is finding that so many people have some kind of experience with this, like what you're describing with Jasmine, a feeling like there is this person in your life who feels almost like a partner and they're a friend and that's possible.
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