Who Knew It with Matt Stewart

111 - Jess Perkins, Zachary Ruane, Mish Wittrup and Dave Warneke

Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features Jess Perkins (Do Go On), Zachary Ruane (Aunty Donna), Mish Wittrup (Mish and Zach's Leguizamarama) and Dave Warneke (Do Go On, Book Cheat)!

Check out Matt's stand up special: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhE

Support the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!

See the podcast/Matt live: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/

Check out Matt's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/

Theme song by Evan Munro-Smith, Logo by @muzdoodles and edited by Connor Schmidt!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:: 1h 26m
Broadcast on:: 28 Oct 2024
Audio Format:: other

Hello, Matt here, letting you know that I've got some shows coming up in Brisbane. We're doing a live, who knew it, and I'm also doing a stand-up show in my show, Ding, at the Caxton Street Festival in the 19th of October. And then I'm going to be in Geelong, working on an hour of new material on the 31st of October at the brewery there. Geez, I'm looking forward to that. Then, of course, I'm flying over with my friends, Jess and Dave, to do a tour of Europe, for Dewgo On, but at the end of that tour, I'm doing three, who knew it shows with stand-up as well. In London on the 17th of November, Leicester on the 21st of November, and Edinburgh on the 23rd of November. Cannot wait to do all of these shows, hopefully we'll see you there. You can find tickets at mattstew@comedy.com. Mattstew@comedy.com. Hey, I'm Ryan Reynolds. Recently, I asked Mint Mobile's legal team if big wireless companies are allowed to raise prices due to inflation. They said yes. And then when I asked if raising prices technically violates those onerous to your contracts, they said, what the f*ck are you talking about? You insane Hollywood f*ck. So to recap, we're cutting the price of Mint Unlimited from $30 a month to just $15 a month. Give it a try at mintmobile.com/switch. $45 up from payment equivalent to $15 per month, new customers on first three month plan only, taxes and fees extra, speeds lower above 40 gigabytes of details. [MUSIC PLAYING] Welcome to Who Knew at the quiz show where the guests are at the wrong hands. So I'm the titular Mattstew at my co-host this week as Mr. Dave Warneke. [CHEERING] Dave, Dave, Dave, it's so good to have you here, Dave. Hello, Matt. The titular Mattstew, great to be here with you. How are you? I'm really good. How about you? You're ready to co-host this with me? I'm very excited. Now, I'm nervous to keep the scores right, but we'll work that out. I know. I'm a bit worried about it, but I thought no one saw. But they did. So Dave, some of the people in the audience will have seen Bookcheat, which we did yesterday. And I was a guest on your show. And I just hope you pay my show as much respect. You can just-- as I paid you it. [CHEERING] I'm just going to need about seven more of these in the next year. For the listeners at home, Dave is holding up a can of beer. A can of beer with your face on him. From Bob Riggie. Absolutely my highest honor. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, turn the label. I'm not sure if people at home have seen it. So there you go. There's the beautiful Who Brew It with Mattstew It. Bob Riggie, they've done it again. They've got up for Bob Riggie, but all of them, limited run to just 12 cans. And Dave is going to drink them all tonight. In the next hour, absolutely. Dave, do you want to introduce our guests? Yes, our first guest is also host of the doogoo on podcasts so much like Matt and myself, please. Put your hands together for Jess Perkins. [CHEERING] Jess, how are you feeling? I was also on Booktit yesterday, so I'm here to fuck around. [LAUGHTER] That was torturous. I have about mixed reports. It really feels like it was a love or hate type performance. Yeah. I'm in the hate camp. Yeah. [LAUGHTER] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So ready to have some fun. Oh, good. All right, Dave, who else have we got? Our second guest this week is one half of the "Mish and Zach" podcast. It's "Mish," Big Wet, Whitro! [CHEERING] Hi. [LAUGHTER] How are you doing? Classic, Big Wet. Classic, Big Wet, I forgot how to talk in a microphone. Classic, Big Wet. Thanks so much for joining us. You are probably, I'd say, by a long stretch, the most popular guests on this show. Oh, good fun! [CHEERING] Thank you, buddy. All right, Dave. I'm going to say popular because I draw blood, because I cannot for anyone else on this stage except my win. I'd say probably our final guest is probably right up there with the most popular as well. Dave, do you want to introduce them? That's right. They are the other half of "Mish and Zach." It's Zachi of Ellie himself, Zachi of Ellie! [CHEERING] [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE] Hey, there you go. See, normally in your three from three right on the show, I think, perfect record. I think at least in the last two episodes, you've put the shades on during the app. Yeah, I thought I'd come on with them. I don't usually have a live audience, but I said to you that I arrived here today that I feel like a boxer. Like, I play so few games of this, like a boxer would maintain their record. Yeah, and this is hard. This is a title match right now. I'm playing some very strong players, and I'm afraid I'm going to lose. You're so committed, as well, out the back before, the cheerful, earful podcast people were like, "Oh, just so you know, it gets really hot in there, so if you need to take your jackets off," and we're like, "Yeah, yeah, you took our jackets off," and Zach just stood there for me. [LAUGHTER] And still has the jacket on. [LAUGHTER] Unlike most people, I want to see me. I want you to see me sweat. [LAUGHTER] I've got the opposite strategy of those players. [LAUGHTER] All right, so the way the show works is, Dave, why don't you tell them? That's right. In the script, it says my name next to this sentence. How about I read this bit? All right, the way the show works is, Matt asks a relatively obscure trivia question, and our contestants have to write a convincing fake answer. Matt then reads their answers, as well as the real one, and they have to guess which one is correct. All right, is everyone familiar with how to play? And you'll be sent-- I should have said this before, but you'll be sending your answers to Dave. OK. OK. Oh, so I have to unblock Dave. You got unblocked Dave. Are we all friends on Facebook? All right, let's just-- All right, here's the first question. This one comes from listener Kelly Clark from Malgumungup, Maylands, and the question is, in early modern English, what does the word "miramadon" mean? What does the word "miramadon" mean? In early modern English. Early modern English. It had different meanings at different times. I do not want the ancient Greek. I want the-- Is that what I know? All right, while they're writing their answers, I'll explain how the scoring works. So you get one point, if your fake answer is guessed by the other contestant, and another point, if you correctly guess the answer. And by the way, I'm also playing as the house. Oh, not that committed to the boo. Yeah. I think some people were even considering just being silent. Yeah. Almost. Stay neutral. Anyway, so I've got two of my own fake answers for each question with the help of the question writer. So really, I think of the house as all of us. Mish has never messaged Dave before. No, my Facebook got hacked. Oh, that's right. So before that, had you ever messaged Dave? No. [LAUGHTER] Yeah, every night before bed. Do you remember? No, do you like Dave? Can I just point out that Jess is admitted to looking at your screen? Mm-hmm. Oh, my God. OK, I see how this is. Oh, you're about to get wet. [LAUGHTER] Can I just say to the fans, thank you for Zakiya Valley. I really like that as a nickname for two reasons. One, it's like dark and mysterious, and it evokes Macya Valley. And two, because it sounds like Zakiya. So it's a little bit cute. [LAUGHTER] Because I'm multifaceted. Yes, babe. Has it? [LAUGHTER] Has anyone not heard or seen this show before? Oh. So this must be baffling. [LAUGHTER] Why are they calling that girl big wet? [LAUGHTER] You don't want to know? I don't know why they call it big wet. I don't even remember why you guys calling me wet. All right, so anyway, all of us can screw up to three points per round. It seems fair, but the probability actually favors me at the house. And the house soft and wins. Not always, to be honest, probably less than 50/50. But anyway, most of our questions come around great Patreon supporters. If you want to submit a question sign up on any level via patreon.com/diggeronpod linked in the show, no, it's any Patrons in today? [CHEERING] So good. All right, so the answers are in. Here is question number one. Can I just say, funny, their name is so similar to Kelly Clarkson. [LAUGHTER] That got the exact amount of laughter. [LAUGHTER] I don't get it. Well, who's the name? Kelly Clark, the-- Oh, I wasn't interested in that. [LAUGHTER] I was just waiting to win. [LAUGHTER] Jess has just put on some shades as well. Ah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. In early modern English, what does the word mirror mid on mean? A deli meat, usually thinly sliced and served in white bread sandwiches with tomato sauce. Someone who is the source or cause of murmurings or rumors. A slavishly-- that's option two, option three. A slavishly loyal underling. A worker who unquestionably unquestioningly obeys. Here for whatever you need to know, I'm a little mean. Option four, a woman of nobility that refuses to marry. Option five, a sausage made out of leftovers and food scraps. Option six, an animal, usually an ox or horse used for farm labor. Or finally, a really fucked mermaid. [LAUGHTER] Yeah, good. Who should we go with first-year, Dave? Maybe Jess? Yeah, closest to you, and then we'll go through the round. How dare you? Good system. What do you think of Jess? Are these prescription? No. You're blind. I'm going to go-- [LAUGHTER] You had that answer locked in. I wasn't listening to what you said. They came free with a six-pack of beer. And yeah, they are prescription. Yeah, well, I'm going to get option two. Option two, someone who is the source or cause of murmurings or rumors locked in for Jess. I'm not fashion about with reasons. I was going to go with that one, too. Not the fucked mermaid one? This close. I'm so sorry. Could we hear them again, please? Dally meat, thinly sliced, and a sandwich, to my-- No, that's more to Dela. There's Stradsburg. There's more than one deli meat, Mieche. And it was modern English, so-- [LAUGHTER] He's not really ignorant right now, Mieche. Unless I wrote it. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. She's not good. She's not good. Then you have the source or cause of murmurings or rumors, savagely loyal, underling, a noble woman that refuses to marry, a sausage man or a leftover's animal used for farm labor or a fucked mermaid. There's something about the sausage. There is, isn't there? But not the deli meat. But what's your answer? [LAUGHTER] Oh, we do have fun. I'm going to go with the same as Jess, the memory boy. [INTERPOSING VOICES] The little boy that merpeths. Yeah, someone who's murmured. I'm going to regret this, but I'm going to go the nobility woman one. OK. Locking that in for Zach, the evaluator. I reckon that's the house, though. That's a woman of nobility that refuses to marry. Yeah, but you can't believe it. All right. Here's who wrote the answers. I should say Dave is also putting in an answer, which was a really fucked mermaid. [LAUGHTER] That was me, everyone. Thank you. Thank you. I don't know what happens. I guess if someone picks yours, you get a point. Yeah, that would be awesome. Can you pick mine? Can you let me know which one are yours and then I'll pick it? You'll know. I have a feeling when it's not going to be that hard to figure out. Any animal used a four farm labor? That was Zach. Sausage made out of leftovers. That was the house. Good one. Deli meat used sandwiches. That was Jess. [MUSIC PLAYING] A woman of nobility that refuses to marry. Zach went for that. That was mesh. You just got wet. [LAUGHTER] I'm stuffed to the floor. [LAUGHTER] Jess and mesh both went for social cause of memories or rumors. That was actually-- Sausage what? Sausage. [INTERPOSING VOICES] That was actually Kelly, AKA the house. Oh, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, Kelly. Yep, good stuff. [LAUGHTER] That's your best sense since you've been gone. [LAUGHTER] We do have fun. Dave, you're tabulating the scores there, right? Absolutely. Would you like me to read those out, man? At the end of round one, currently tied on zero points, it's Jess and Zach. Mesh is on one point, but out in front of two, it's the house. It's the right answer. Yeah, can we find out what the real answer was? And the correct answer is a slavishly loyal underling, a worker who unquestionably unquestioningly obeys. Yeah, slavishly threw me. That's why I thought it was delicious. Slavishly sounds like the sort of big word someone would use in an attempt to make something sound real. Yeah. I was the same. Fuck, the real answer's playing hard now. [LAUGHTER] I want to use real answers. All right, I'll take my sunglasses off. We'll have fun now. [LAUGHTER] Hey, everybody, good to see you. OK. It's just a bit of fun. We're not actually trying to win or anything. [LAUGHTER] [INAUDIBLE] Question two is submitted by four different listeners. Tyler Brown from Ellicott City in Maryland. Jim Bates from Suckets Harbor in New York. Kayla Hodquitz from Lemoine, Maine, and Nick Dennis from Eddas in Pennsylvania. Four people all saw this and thought, I know where I can put-- I can send this. Like separately. Separately, yeah. Wow. And the question is, which of the following is a real species of spider? Which of the following is a real species of spider? So you've got to write down a fake species of spider. While you're writing those answers, hit some more info on memerdons. Dave, you're up for listening to this? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm engaged, man. I'm here for you. I love you. I'm listening to you. Ah, Kelly writes, I learnt this word from a lockdown-era episode of Guy Montgomery's Guy Mont spelling bee. I caught in a wiki in Greek mythology the Miradons were an ancient Thessalian Greek tribe. In home as Iliad, the Miradons, the soldiers commanded by Achilles. Their eponymous ancestor was Miradon. Miraman. I reckon you said that differently every time. Miradon, a king of Thioidus. Dave, can you, what's that word? P-H-T-H. Yes, Stephen. Stephen. You could say that one, Dad, for the Otis? The Otis, the Otis. Who was the son of Zeus? And apparently, in one account, Zeus seduced euro Medusa. Zeus seduced. Oh, Zeus seduced Medusa. [LAUGHTER] - But does his-- - Ah, it's truth. To seduce her, he took the form of an hand. [LAUGHTER] You know what I was doing? I was waiting for the camera to be pointed at me so I could pose at it. [LAUGHTER] I was not listening. I was looking-- I was looking past this mat to that mat. And then I went, I reckon he's pointed at Dave. But-- [LAUGHTER] And then you were like, I haven't fun. [LAUGHTER] And you're like, come on in. I'm like, I am having my own fun, actually. [LAUGHTER] Now that I'm aware-- now that I'm aware, there's still photography. I'm just going to-- whenever I'm not doing anything, I'm just going to do this pose. [LAUGHTER] Because my-- because my-- now, I need to know that there's a stills camera because only my face is-- [LAUGHTER] For anyone listening, not watching, we're doing silly faces. [LAUGHTER] Have you got the answers in there, Dave? I forgot that I had to do that bit. [LAUGHTER] Wait a second, everyone. Oh, that's OK. I can tell, though, it's a bit more about this word. [LAUGHTER] He was so enthralled by the-- I want you to tell me about the Zeus fucking someone who dresses an ant. Yeah, no, that's wild. Had you heard of them because they're from home as Elia? That's something-- have you read that? I have not. OK. But I will now-- I don't know, there's a fucking ant. Apparently, the Miradons of Greek myth were known for their loyalty to their leaders so that in pre-industrial Europe, the word Miradon carried many of the same connotations that Robot does today. Miradon? Miradon. Miradon. I think I'm confusing it with Marabenong. [LAUGHTER] We're high points, don't we? [LAUGHTER] Apparently, the meaning of the word has continued to evolve. And later, it came to mean hired ruffian, according to the Oxford English Dictionary. Hired ruffian, yeah, sick. It's a good drag name. Hired ruffian. Yeah, that is good, yeah. All right, question two, the answers are in, which of the following is the real species of spider? Thunderous swami, the flicking matchbox. Jesus Christ, Zach, there's a fucking table in front of you. It's not the same phone. You keep dropping? Yeah, I keep dropping my phone by accident, or maybe not. Oh, it was a tactic. Oh, or maybe by accident. [LAUGHTER] Option three, Amazonian lady head. Option four, Hot Wheels Sisyphus. [LAUGHTER] Option five, little hairy spooky boy. [LAUGHTER] That's not bad. That's pretty good. Option six, strong Gregory, or option seven, a really fucked spider. [LAUGHTER] That sounds good to me. All right, missh, can I hear them again? Yes, sure, yeah, yeah. Thunderous swami, the flicking matchbox. Amazonian lady head, Hot Wheels Sisyphus. Little hairy spooky boy. Strong Gregory, or a really fucked spider. [LAUGHTER] OK. There's something about-- I know it's stupid, but there is something about strong Gregory. Yeah, that's really just given me a nice little tickle. So I think I'm going to go with strong Gregory, which is-- oh, yeah, I am, because apparently it's rice. [LAUGHTER] So no, we'll go with strong Gregory, thank you. All right, strong Gregory for miss. What do you think, Zach? Can I hear the first two one more time? I'm so sorry. Thunderous swami, the flicking matchbox. Oh, see, strong Gregory. The reason why I do like the sound of strong Gregory is because four people rode in with the same thing, so it has to be a funny answer. But I am just going to go with flicking matchbox, because I think I'm going down today. OK. So you're just going to go down and flick up. [LAUGHTER] What were you mean? I don't know, because I just-- I don't know. I'm off my game here today. There are a good jokes that come from a flicking matchbox one. Flicking matchbox. A few of them have-- they're bordering on salacious. [LAUGHTER] All right, that's locked in for Zach. That leaves you, Jess. I'm obviously very, very tempted by a really fucked spider. [LAUGHTER] Yeah, I reckon that's pretty good. Yeah, yes. [LAUGHTER] I think that's very, very good. I think if that is a joke, and so that's written by the funniest person who's ever walked in. I agree. [LAUGHTER] But I think I'm going to go for Hot Wheel Sisyphus. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Beautiful choice. That's good stuff. Here's the right of the answers. This is going to shock you. A really fucked spider was Dave Wernicke. Oh, wow. Oh, almost fooled you. I knew it was Dave, because his first one featured something like that. [LAUGHTER] I knew it was Dave, because after you said it, Dave went-- [LAUGHTER] I mean, you've got to appreciate good work. [LAUGHTER] Little hairy spooky boy. That was Jess. Good stuff, Jess. Good stuff, Jess. I'm just happy that they laugh. Yeah, that one. I'm happy. That's a point for me. Usually the love shows. In here. Well, yes. Dave, could we get one hot point for Jess, please? One hot point. One hot point. Sure, sure. We're playing for hot points. [LAUGHTER] I thought it was nice when they laughed at something I did earlier. [LAUGHTER] That's a false. Hot point, yeah. Negative hot points for Zach. Yeah, fuck, fuck, fuck. [LAUGHTER] Amazonian lady head. That was Zach. Yeah, knew that. Oh, yeah. Why? Why did you know? So I know to change my channel. I just-- no, I just know. I just know. I could see you picking up your phone, going, oh, this will get that fucking big wet bitch. [LAUGHTER] My god. I just-- I'd say it smelled like Zach. [LAUGHTER] OK. All right. [LAUGHTER] The flicking matchbox, Zach went for that. That was a big wet again. [CHEERING] You're sobbing today. [LAUGHTER] Big wet went into that great river of more episodes and has emerged stronger than I could have anticipated. [LAUGHTER] Strong, Gregory, misremember that. That was actually Nick, AKA the house. Oh, that's a good one. That's a good one. And this means Jess is correct. Hot wheel sisyphus. [CHEERING] I could see why four different people wear this has to be a question. So Dave, that's a point for mesh, a point for Jess, and a point for the whole-- And also a heart point for Jess as well. A heart point for Jess as well. And also a negative heart point for us. That's right. It's like we get the normal score update and then the heart point scenario. How do you win the heart point? How does that work? That's the thing Zach, you're forcing it. I know. I cannot force it. The only thing that I'm just going to be-- [LAUGHTER] Part of it is just-- Thanks for laughing, everyone. I love you all. [LAUGHTER] It's so sad. It's so sad. We'll just keep playing. We'll see what happens. So the score is at the end of round number two, Matt, on zero points, but also minus a heart point. It's Zach. On two points, we've got mesh. Jess-- sorry, I should have read this the other way. Jess is on one point, but it also has a positive heart point. But out in front, on three points, the house is leading. Oh, good. Yeah, this heart's not in the boo. And I take that as a win. That's one of my points. That's one of my points. [LAUGHTER] All right, Matt has his own heart point. We'll put that in. OK. Question number three comes from Wales, from-- I always assume you know how to pronounce names. C-R-I in Welsh. Would that be Cherry or Sari or? Kerry. Kerry. Kerry, John Jones from Swansea. No, we've made his borders Welsh pancakes before. Oh, my god. And we ate them, and they were delicious. That's right. We did. He bought them for you. Yeah, we did a show in Bristol, which is closest to Wales. Sorry I came to Wales at the company. When was it a corn exchange to see a clock that had an extra hand? Yeah, well, he just gave you like a ziplock bag full of pancakes. And you ate them. [LAUGHTER] But I don't remember the following three days. [LAUGHTER] Would you like some pancakes? [LAUGHTER] I mean, no one's ever been poisoned by a Welshman. Sure. [LAUGHTER] So-- That's pretty good that pancake, but it may be worth a half. [LAUGHTER] That's really up to you, Dave. You're a score. I'll give you a half per wish. Cancels out your negative heart once you're currently on zero heart points. Yes! [LAUGHTER] All right, so Kerry's question is, what did TV personality in brackets, that's what Google says, close brackets. Dave Warnicki tweet, on the 8th of May 2015. On the 8th of May. So this will really favor you if you're a big Warnicki head. Yeah, do you remember one of my great tweets from 2015? I remember all of them, yeah. [LAUGHTER] While you're writing those answers, it's 2015, Dave. What was the character count then? These are the kind of things that must be floating through big, wet, minor. What's got to be 120 back then, do you reckon? I can't remember. It's a great question, though, and I'm-- 140? 140. Whoa. Can I confirm? Thank you. [LAUGHTER] We'll let it around that to make us sound like you and you. While they're writing their answer, I'll let the audience know a bit more about this spider. According to Tyler, the genus name is derived from the toy car's hot wheels. [LAUGHTER] Ah. [LAUGHTER] Because apparently, the pedipalp structure resembles a hot wheels track. Kayla adds, "The species is named for Sisyphus, a king from Greek mythology who is punished by the gods for cheating death. For this, the gods sentenced him to an eternity of rolling a boulder up a hill only for it to roll back down. The cyclical nature of his punishment reminded the authors of the circular cupulatory tube of the spider, the authors. I guess the authors of the scientific thing that named it. This was discovered this year. It's a fresh spider. This one only dropped months ago. Do you know what would have been really fucked? Is if it was discovered like 50 years ago before hot wheels? [LAUGHTER] Oh, my Lord. We named them hot wheels because they're so small, they almost resemble that spider. [LAUGHTER] By the answer to question number three, what did TV personality Dave Wannicki tweet on the head to May 2015? Drempt I was in the shower and the water was going in reverse. Being sucked out of me back into the shower head, whoa. [LAUGHTER] That's option one. That would make you go. Whoa. That is a very 2015 tweet as well. We were figuring it out. [LAUGHTER] Option two, that's a whole lot of pie. Hashtag pies, hashtag C31, hashtag channel 31. [LAUGHTER] Trying to get that channel 31 bump. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] That was uncharacteristically bitchy, and I loved it. [LAUGHTER] Option three, my mum just cut up my sausages during a family meal. I'm an adult now mum. What if I wanted to choke? [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] I'm giving away nothing. I'm giving away nothing. I'm giving away nothing. I'm giving away nothing. This is hard because we're playing against two people that know Dave very, very well, because already I've heard three tweets that, sorry, you could have done. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [INAUDIBLE] [LAUGHTER] Option four, just heard my neighbour walking his dog say, one more sniff, and that's it. [LAUGHTER] Ha ha, wouldn't want this dog to go over his sniff limit? [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [INAUDIBLE] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] I can't tell you how much I'm going to go and delete every tweet I did. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] I just looked it up. I joined in 2011. I'm so worried that I thought, no one's ever going to go back and read these. Fuck. [LAUGHTER] You can search for offensive terms. You can't search for bad jokes. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Then you've got, I'm really loving so many podcasts right now. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] That's pretty good. [LAUGHTER] That's pretty good. I mean... [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Oh, that is so good. That is so 2015 days. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] To be fair, when that breaks that hard, it's usually it's something Dave has written. [LAUGHTER] So that could very well be a legit one. [LAUGHTER] Oh, that's so good. [LAUGHTER] It's so funny hearing what people think of you by what you were doing. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Oh, that's good. [LAUGHTER] Option six. Dave Wernicke, more like Dave Hornicke. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] See me in a pornicky. [LAUGHTER] Don't forget the pop corner key. [LAUGHTER] I live in Hawthorne key. [LAUGHTER] Come around, you won't yawn a key. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Oh, man. I am mortified right now. [LAUGHTER] Oh, finally. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Oh, finally in a quite attributed to Jess Perkins. Hi, everyone. It's Dave Wernicke here. Australia's best comedian and definitely not a virgin. [LAUGHTER] Just going on the record that I vow to never be anyone's sidekick. I'm the host with the most, not some other guy's little buddy who keeps score or some dumb shit like that. [LAUGHTER] That's nine years ago. Yeah. [LAUGHTER] You have changed me. Yeah. That was cool back then. [LAUGHTER] All right, Zach, it's your crack. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Oh, God. I love that you're like, "Oh, how dare you think that of me?" But the fact that it's hard to find the real answer. [LAUGHTER] What an indictment. Oh, my God. No, 2015. It was a hard time of figuring it out. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Well, just imagine, is Kerry at home going through all the tweets to try and find a fucked one? [LAUGHTER] Scrolled back to 2015. [LAUGHTER] Almost definitely, I would say. Yeah. Don't do that to me. Just out of interest. Do you remember which one it is? I do not remember. Do you have any of that? None of that rings a bell at all. Wow. And one of them you wrote like five minutes ago. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Oh. I think I'm going to go with one of the food ones. Mm-hmm. A whole lot of pie. Hashtag pie. [LAUGHTER] Can you say, say, say, say, go on? Can you say, say, go on? Again. You guys are quick. You do a little, like, silly. Hey, if you want to-- Choose the channel. The show's in backwards. Yeah. That's a good one. Hashtag 31. [LAUGHTER] That's so funny. I'm just cutting up my sausages during a family meal. I'm an adult now. [LAUGHTER] Just heard my neighbor say, walking his dog say, one more sniff and that's it. I love this one. I'm really loving so many podcasts right now. [LAUGHTER] That's just good writing. [LAUGHTER] Dave Wernicke, more like Dave Hornicke, et cetera. Good writing. Or I'll never be anyone's little sidekick. OK. I'm going to go with the sausage one. Sausage? Yeah. Right. Locking in the sausage for Dave. [LAUGHTER] What do you think? What's meant the dog walking one? [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Because I also thought it was the sausage one. [LAUGHTER] But the dog walking, right the dog walking one again. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] I just heard my neighbor walking his dog say, one more sniff and that's it. Ha ha. Wouldn't want this dog to go over his sniff limit. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] I wouldn't choose that one. You wouldn't want the dog to go over his sniff limit. [LAUGHTER] I'd be worried about that dog. It's, yeah. I think it might be the C31. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Because that's very funny. But I'm choosing the neighbor. Walk at the dog. The sniff limit. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] This is probably the best question that I've never been asked on this road. [LAUGHTER] It's so funny. [LAUGHTER] There's something in the water with the shower one. But I also was pretty convinced it's the sausage. So I think I might go sausage as well. Go sausage? All right. Here's a throw at the answers. Oh, that's so funny. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] The one with the shower going backwards. That was the house. Wow. That's pretty good. That's a whole lot of pie. #piles #c31. That was Zach. [LAUGHTER] That's very good. Thank you. It's very 25th day. It's very 25th day. Why is it he was on channel? [LAUGHTER] That's a good day. That's fair. That's fair. That's fair. I did more research. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] The one where he played that he's not a virgin or anyone's sidekick. That was just Perkins. [LAUGHTER] Can I come clean on something? I also accidentally copied and pasted Jess Perkins name. [LAUGHTER] At the start of it. So Matt said, this is quite attributed to Jess Perkins. I just copied your name from basically. [LAUGHTER] Oh, that was a weird choice. [LAUGHTER] But that was no way for me to ask you. Yeah, yeah. Without a band. Jess is yours. Is it yours? I mostly wrote it just to watch Dave read it. [LAUGHTER] So you guys were chatting and I was doing this. [LAUGHTER] I don't know if you noticed, but I sat reacting to it. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] It did different. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Good. [LAUGHTER] Dave Honeke, more like Dave Honeke. That was Dave. Yeah. [LAUGHTER] At the time Dave now. You'd never know that. But in 2015 I was living in Hawthorne, so. Yeah. [LAUGHTER] That's right. I do know that. My favorite. I'm really loving so many podcasts right now. - Last right now, that was mish. (laughing) - That's so good. - Was there a typo on purpose? (laughing) - You guys are like, which one? - See, so many podcasts. - Yeah, yeah, yes, yes, yes. - I think, I think that, yeah. That's fantastic. - That's good stuff. - Ah, so. - Oh. - Oh. - Mish and Zach both went for the sausages. That was written by Kerry John. - Oh. - Oh, leading Jesses once again, correct. Sniff Lemon. (laughing) - I don't know if you have any way of knowing that. Do we know how many likes, if any, that received. I could not figure out how to find it. I'm like Google it, I could not find it. Do you definitely wrote it though? Imagine if Kerry John has just come up with it. - It's made it up. - Now, it's all been played. - It tribute it to me. - It does sound like something. - It does. - For sure. - Do you think I got in your head pretty well with the shower going backwards? I thought Kerry got right in your head with that chopped up the sausages. - Oh yeah, you definitely got in my head 'cause I remember once tweeting about that era. Oh, I just shaved my, I put the shaver cartridge in upside down and I ended up putting more hair on my face than taking it off. (laughing) - I really got in your head. But that is the kind of thing I wrote about 10 years ago. - But can we please acknowledge that Zach really got in your head as well with, I love pies, hashtags, see 31. (laughing) Because as you pointed out, you love pies. And particularly in that era, all of us were doing a lot of channel 31 stuff. - I wrote, I love pies 'cause he loves pies and then I thought, that's not enough. Then I wrote hashtag pies. I'm like, still not enough. - Yeah. - He was also a channel 31. - That's good stuff. - It's nice to know when your old mates really know you. (laughing) (laughing) - And old mate, it was good. - Dave, that's two points for the house, one point for Jess. As we go on to question number four, we'll get a score check in a bit. But this one's from Lewis Gammel from Glasgow. - Glasgow. - And the question is, which of these (laughing) was a real candidate that stood in the recent UK general election? So it's just their name, it's a. - The recent UK. - Yeah, just a politician with a quirky or different name. Something that might've stood out to Lewis Gammel of Glasgow. While you're writing your answers, here's a little more info about Dave Warnicki. (laughing) - Looking forward to this. (laughing) - According to Kerry John Jones, Dave Warnicki is known for Frank it, Frank it, what does that say? - Frank it, Bill? - Frank it, Bill. - I think that was a 17. - That was a 17. - Peterson channel 31 show. (laughing) - I hopefully know what that is, but I still can't, my mouth could not make that sound. Also under the Milky Way 2016, Dave Warnicki was that aired. - That was also on that channel 31. - Hashtag channel 31. (laughing) - Who else was also in that? - I believe both of you. (laughing) Were you in the under the Milky Way on channel 31? - No, but we did the, what was the tonight show? - Tonight show. - Yeah, about tonight. - The other thing that Kerry John said is his voice has a total air time of one month, two weeks from podcasting alone. - What? - John that Dave? - That does sound like he's stalking you actually. - Can you say it again? - His voice has a total air time of one month and two weeks from podcasting alone. - That's not enough. (laughing) - It genuinely doesn't feel like enough. - But maybe if it's on average, like if just talking. - I don't understand what you just said. - Yeah, I don't know if I fully do either. (laughing) A total air time. - Like if you cut out only the talking from Dave and you played it 24/7, you would take a month. - Yeah, 'cause you're helping. - I was singing the full podcast, but you're not talking the whole time on those. - I'm talking most of the time. (laughing) - Matt's talking the whole time. (laughing) - Even where on he's absolutely over the top. (laughing) - And five minutes later he goes, sorry, I don't interrupt you this, or rather. (laughing) - All right, while you're still riding your hands, let's go for a quick break. (upbeat music) - Ryan Reynolds here for mid mobile. With the price of just about everything going up during inflation, we thought we'd bring our prices down. So to help us, we brought in a reverse auctioneer, which is apparently a thing. - Mid mobile unlimited, premium wireless. Have it to get 30, 30, 30, 30, get 20, 20, 20, 20, 20, 20, get 15, 15, 15, 15, just 15 bucks a month, so. - Give it a try at midmobile.com/switch. - $45 up from payment equivalent to $15 per month. New customers on first three month plan only. Taxes and fees extra. Speed slower above 40 gigabytes of detail. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) - All right, we're back. (laughing) - He does that even when you're in a studio episode. And sometimes the guests have never been on the show with one. I've seen them look around like fuck. (laughing) And then he just keeps talking. - So the answer for question number four. Which of these is a real candidate that stood in the recent UK general election? Thomas Fingerbottom. (laughing) - Good stuff. That's very good stuff. Humphrey Humperdink. Sean Van Horn. (laughing) Theodore Fuffield-Thesington, the third. - Oh, you're kidding. - Matthew McConaughey. (laughing) Count Binface. (laughing) - Binface. - Oh, Sir Doggius sniff limit. (laughing) - That's very good. - So you got seven pretty good options there. We're back to you, Jess. - I've never heard, I've never heard a clap with the tone of yes, very good. (laughing) - Yeah. - No. - A real feet lead orth Ifield-Thesington, the third. That's our eight clap. - Can we have them again, please? - Sure can. Thomas Fingerbottom. Humphrey Humperdink. Sean Van Horn. Theodore Fuffield-Thesington, the third. (laughing) Matthew McConaughey. Count Binface. Sir Doggius sniff limit. - I'm going on Fingerbottom. - Yeah. - And what's your answer? (cheering) - I'm very torn between Matthew and Sean. - Oh, yeah. Matthew McConaughey and Sean Van Horn. - Yeah. - Matthew McConaughey. - Well, no, they wouldn't surprise me if it was like that's their name, but they're not. - Yeah, it's not. It's not, oh, round, round, round, round. - Yeah, but I think it's also, I think I do think it's a bit fuffish. So I'm thinking it might be Sean Van Horn. But then it could be Humphrey. - True, they have Humphrey's over there. - They love a Humphrey. - Yeah. Don't get him over this side. - What's Humphrey's last? - No. - Humphrey Humperdink. - Humphrey Humperdink. (laughing) - And you probably, you can't tell, but looking at it written down, Humphrey, the first four letters are Humph. (laughing) So, yeah. - I'm gonna go with Humphrey. - Did that tell you the last thing I said? - No, it's that I think that Zach did that deliberately. To make me think that here's his Sean. - Oh. - Do you know what I mean? Because he knows that I would think that he-- - Do you think mine was Sean? - Yeah. - Do you? - Yeah. - You sure? - No. (laughing) Why do you think mine is Sean? - Because I think, so I thought yours was Humphrey, but then you just did that. And I think you did that because you're like, she's going to know that I'm playing. And mine's actually Sean. - I want me to change the order and lock in my answer. - Okay. - Yeah, good. - And then you can change your answer if you want. - Yeah, sure. - I'm going to lock in Sean. - Oh. (laughing) (laughing) (screaming) - Whoa. That is Zachi Bellion. - Why would I do that? - Why would I give you the chance to change? - Oh. - Yeah, but you could have also just locked in your own 'cause you're being all pisshead. (laughing) - I can't, you're not allowed to lose change. - Oh, you can't. - Yeah, you're not allowed to lock in your own. - Otherwise, I would just be choosing mine the whole time. - I think yours is one of the three you listed just then. I feel pretty confident about that. Now, you feel pretty confident that mine is one of them? - Yeah. - Mm. Give her the list again. - Thomas Fingerbottom. Humphrey Humperdink. Sean Van Horn. Theodore Thufield Fenton III. Matthew McConaughey. Count Binface. Sir Doggius Sniff Limit. (laughing) - Mm. - Oh, fucking hell. - But if you look in the same answer as him-- - No, I think that you did Matthew. - Oh, okay. - Because I think that you would think that that would fuck me. - Mm. - So I'm going Sean. - Oh, did you hear that? - That's so good. - That's so good. - But is that two I feel? - That's two I feel every time in a show. - That's two I feel every time in a show in there. - You're so ahead, you might as well go for something else. (laughing) - No, but I was pretty certain it was Sean. - Yeah, me too. - Can I change my answer? - Oh, no, you locked in sir, I'm afraid. Here's who wrote the answer, Sir Doggius Sniff Limit. - That was Dave. (laughing) - Thank you. - Wow. (clapping) - You almost went for Humphrey Humperdink and you did right to change. So that was Lewis, AKA the house. - Well done. - To the house. - Jess went for Thomas Fingerbottom. That was Zach. (laughing) - It's very good. - It's funny because of Fingerbottom. (laughing) - And I think Thomas was the perfect name. - Yeah. - You didn't overeat. - Yeah, that was I was playing around with, I think I did play around with a Humphrey at one point and I thought no, pull it back, Zach. (laughing) - Pull it back. - Theodore Thuffield, then the one I can't say I wrote, that's the house, didn't I think that's the truth. (laughing) Then Sean Van Horn, Zach and Mitch went for that. That was Jess. (laughing) (cheering) (applause) - Oh, shit. - Oh, I didn't even think to look at you once in the last 40 minutes. (laughing) - What a twist. - What a twist. - What a twist. - And can I just say, absolutely sucked the fuck in. (laughing) - That was sick. - Are you a twin pigs fan? - That. - Oh, I don't know. (laughing) - My mum yesterday, didn't it? - Yeah. - Yeah, it's a day left. - Do go on episode, we had a Sean Van Horn. - Yeah, he's a journalist who, no, he's a, yeah, journalist who's written about the Amityville horror. - Oh, I was thinking of coming and watching some stuff yesterday, so I really regretting that now. - That was genius, Jim. - Thank you, McConaughey. That was mesh. (laughing) - I knew that was you. - I knew that was you. - That was a real big, wet stuff there. Did you say that? - Oh, it's between McConaughey and no, but that can't be. - I think the biggest big, wet move was going to him. I think you wrote that. - Oh, yeah. - Because then I was hoping he would be like, can I change it? I want to change it to Matthew. After I said that, and I'd locked in. - So I was very confident it wasn't Matthew McConaughey. And I also knew mesh would know that it wasn't Matthew McConaughey. So then when mesh started going on, I reckon it's Matthew McConaughey. I was like, well, clearly mesh wrote Matthew McConaughey. But I will say, when you said, I think you wrote Matthew McConaughey, I did think, well, maybe she didn't write Matthew McConaughey. (laughing) - I'm doing very poorly now. So I might shift to funny soon. (laughing) - How many more rounds are there? - Two more rounds. - Two more rounds. - You say you didn't make the shift before you wrote finger bottom? (laughing) - I don't know. - Two more, Jake. (laughing) - So that means the correct answer is count bin face. (cheering) - You are kidding me. (clapping) - Yeah. - It's like he changed that. - He's insane. (laughing) - Yeah. - Right. - No, I figured that out actually with the bin on the head, I've put two or two together. - So Dave, two points for Jess. One point for Zach in that round. After I ask this question, maybe we can get a score update. But the question number five comes from Nickel Roolink from Amherstfort in the Netherlands. And this question is Amherstfort related. Love that, love a local question. The question is, why is Dutch city Amherstfort nicknamed Boulder City? Why is the Dutch city of Amherstfort nicknamed Boulder City? Dave, what's the score update there? - Let's have a look at the scores Matt on one point. It's Zach. (cheering) Also zero heart points, I gotta say that. Then on two points, also on zero heart points, but two regular points is Mish. In second place on four points and one regular heart point, it's Jess Perkins. - Wow. - But add in front on zero heart points, but five regular points, it's the house. - Oh. Does Jess have a name? Yeah, does Jess have a-- - She's Bob. - Jess. - Oh, yeah. She's Bob on a do-go-one. I don't know if that transfers across to this or not. - No, no, no, we're gonna get a name for you. - Can't Benface have anything? - Something's sneaky. - Matt, can you read the question again for me, please? - Sure. Why is Dutch city Amherstfort nicknamed Boulder City? Here's some more info on Count Benface. Korna Lewis, it's a satirical character played by British comedian Jonathan David Harvey, a bit disappointed, but who had also played a similar character, Lord Buckethead. But Buckethead was sued and he had to change the name. Both Benface and Buckethead have run against the incumbent prime minister in multiple elections and sport a black cloak and bin-like helmet. Benface claims to be an alien from the planet Sigma. It's nine, that's in Roman numerals, or that's Ajax. Yep. And in 2024, some of his policies included banning loud snacks from cinemas and theaters, tying MPs wages to that of nurses for 100 years and moving the hand-dryer in the gents at the Crown and Treaty, Uxbridge, to a more sensible location. That's a bit of fun. - That's the most British satire I've ever heard. - No, no, no. Too many loud snacks are actually quite seriously. They're paying our PMs too much. (laughing) - All right, yes, it's a room for the... Penultimate question. - Oh, I said he's back on 'cause I'm still trying to win it. - You made me triple points on the final round, two seconds. - Triple points on the final round? - Whoa, triple heart points as well, guys. - Whoa. - All right, that was such a beautiful wall. - Question number five, why is Dutch City Amherst Fort Nickman Boulder City? Option one, the Boulder family, it were well known in the town for their philanthropic work and for saving an entire family and their pets from a house fire. The town affectionately refers to itself now as Boulder City, that's option one. - Oh. - Option two, a man bet his neighbor in 1661, he could get the townspeople to pull a boulder from six Ks away back to their city by offering them beer and pretzels. - That's option two, option three. And 1994 health survey found that the residents of Amherst Fort had much higher than average testicles. - Higher. (laughing) - Much higher. Higher than average testicles. - Higher than average. We never seen the high testicle. (laughing) - Round belly button. (laughing) - This is a round about a year. - We got a six back and then a two pack right there. (laughing) - They all like that damn Boulder City. (laughing) - They say Boulder City, that's why they got the high testicles. (laughing) - I bet they have that one. - We've never seen so many testicles so high, am I alive? - Option four, the famous Amherst Fort boulders sit at the entrance to the city. - I've got one more bet. - Oh, you won't miss it. It's the one with all the people with high testicles. - Carry on. - Option five, the first mayor of Amherst Fort, Magnus Boulder, was mayor for 27 years before retiring. He went on to become a well-known adult entertainer. - Oh. - Doesn't say anything about the heart of his own name. - Yeah, no. (laughing) - You need like a good hang on your testes to be an adult entertainer. - Oh yeah. - Option six, lots of boulders. (laughing) - That's literally just meant... (laughing) - It wasn't impossible, it wasn't for you, that was real. (laughing) - Oh. - Oh, yuck. (laughing) - So you might have missed that. Option six is a short one, just lots of boulders. (laughing) - Okay, okay. (laughing) - Or option. - That feels the most logical. - Or option seven. The town's first mayor tripped over a small rock and was mocked in the local media. He claimed that it was in fact a boulder and that anyone could have fallen over. Hashtag channel 31. (laughing) - All right, so, mesh, what do you reckon? - Can you read, can you give me a little update? You're not update, you know, a little summer. - Yeah, so the philanthropic boulder family named after them, from a house fire one. - Oh yeah, that sounds pretty good. - The bet about moving a boulder and the prize being beer and skittles - It sounds pretty good, actually. - The one about a higher than average testicles. - That sounds pretty good. - Yeah, it sounds pretty good too. - The famous atmospheric boulder sit at the entrance to the city. - That's what I reckon it is. (laughing) - The first mayor, Magnus Boulder, was mayor for 27 years. - Hashtag channel's over. - Went on to become an old entertainer. - I'm saying it. - Got lots of boulders or you've got hashtag 31. - Hashtag 31. - Oh, this one's hard, like a boulder. (laughing) - I got more than I've ever laughed than it deserves. So thank you. - Thank you. - Wait, say it again, Mish. This one's harder. - Say this one's harder. - This one's harder. - But what about your answer? (laughing) - Say it again, say it again, say it again. - This one's harder. - Like a boulder. (laughing) - I think it could be, it could be. (laughing) - This one's hard. - Like a boulder. (laughing) - What the? You're getting my hand, man. - Oh, that's worse when I stopped trying. (laughing) - I'm gonna go with the... (laughing) - Second one. - Second one. Which was the bet. - Yeah. - What about information, Mish? All right, Zach, what do you think? (laughing) - Can I change it? I haven't looked, it's locked in. (laughing) - Well, I think you've-- - No, actually, I'm confident. Is that-- (laughing) - That was a roller coaster. (laughing) - Look at what other rules. Oh no, no, no, that's fine. (laughing) - You are dilabolical. (laughing) - And it's like, I don't, I'm not trying to win anymore. I'm just doing it, just a fact with people. (laughing) - I will go with, I do love that one. That, what was that, that one? Yeah. (laughing) I do love that one, but I will go with, I will go with the boulders at the entrance of the city. - Boulders at the entrance, all right, for Zach. What do you think, Bob? - I've forgotten most of them, but I won't make you read 'em again. Could I just read 'em off your screen just real quick and just summarize them for myself, just quickly? - No, because I have marked who's written each. No, no, but I won't look at that, I'll just. (laughing) - And I'm diabolical, that was very cheeky. (laughing) - I have genuinely forgotten them, so I'm gonna go for your favorite. - My favorite, probably lots of boulders. (laughing) - Lock it in. - Yeah? (laughing) - No, the mayor, the mayor. - It's called Boulder City, so maybe it is lots of boulders. - Wait, was it the mayor who became. - Adult entertainer? - Yeah, that one. - All right, locked in. Mayor became adult entertainer. Here's a road, the answer is #31, that was Dave Wernicki. - Oh. - Thanks everyone, check it out, it's a great community channel. - Lots of boulders, that was Zacha Vellium, so. (laughing) - He's got funny. (laughing) - He's got funny. I'm fine with it. (laughing) - I wasn't even trying to win. (laughing) - The philanthropic family who saved pets from a house fire that was just Perkins. - Yeah, good stuff. - Oh, like really, I would buy that family. And they should have a city named after him. - They want to know about the higher than average testicles. I wrote that. (laughing) Clearly meant larger. - I'll tell ya. (laughing) - We had fun with it. - Yeah, yeah. - We do have fun. - Yeah, we have fun. - The famous boulders that sit at the entrance to the city, Zach went for that. That was also me. The house. - Oh. - Some foam. - Oh. - Sucked. What the fuck in? - Just went for Magnus Bolder, the adult entertaining mayor. That was mesh, big wet. (laughing) Meaning. - As soon as I pinged it, your face was like, I was like, "Mish, that was mesh." - That means mesh also got it correct. It was the Bolder bet. - Wow. - The pretzels. - Yes. (clapping) - Oh, I feel better now. I feel better now. I've still got it. - You still got it. - I've lost it. - I've lost it. One point for the hoos. - Oh my goodness, Matt. The scores have really tightened up at the top. - All right, we're going to the final round, triple points. I have no idea when we started. Are we almost time to finish? - Oh, yeah. - 10 minutes. - Oh, we'll find a question. I think I'll save that actually. And also the final question. It's question number six, Dave, when they're riding, maybe gives a score update. This comes from David Malofsky from London. And his question is, what is the plot to the 1993 film Surf Ninjas? (laughing) So, yeah. Just a paragraph shop, you know, paragraph for this one. Some of that. Dave, you want to give us this score update? - Oh my goodness, Matt. It is so, so close tonight. Obviously, triple points up for grabs. So it is anyone's game here, but on one point, we've got Zakiya Valley. (clapping) Then, tied on two points. Oh, sorry, tied on four points. It's Big Wet and Bob. (cheering) But, out in front currently on six points, it is the house. (cheering) Truly, anyone's gamer. So, if someone sweeps the final round, they get nine points. If anyone does that, they win. So... - So, I shouldn't do the same thing just go to the shops. (laughing) It's really up to you, but... - I might try. (laughing) - While they're continuing to write their answers, this is about Boulder City. They caught in a nickel, a nickel, the question writer, who lives in Boulder City. - So they don't. - What a thrill. - They, yeah. - Do you reckon they're testicles, though? - What did I write now? (laughing) - They're sweating right now. How did he die? (laughing) - I caught in a nickel. The boulder, the bet was made about, weighs over 7,000 kilograms. - Whoa. - And was washed down to the Netherlands from Scandinavia at the end of the Ice Age. At first, the townspeople were happy about their achievement. So these two farmers, I think, had a bet. One said, I saw a boulder on the way into town. Six guys out. I reckon I can get the townspeople to bring it in. The other one's like, no way. And he goes, I reckon I can. And he did it by saying, if you bring it in, get your some beer and skittles. And they said, fuck yeah. Pretzels. (laughing) Relatively confident skittles haven't quite been invented in the 1600s. (laughing) But anyway, so that worked. And so the boulder gets in the city, but apparently they were stoked. And then soon became the laughing stock around the country for being part of the bet and being part of such a folly. In shame, they buried the boulder under the-- (laughing) We've read so much effort. It's just a boulder. (laughing) So they buried the boulder. So it actually was one of the world's lowest testicles in order, but they buried the boulder under a market square in the 1670s. And it stayed there until 1903 when it was dug up and proudly displayed. In the following years, the city embraced the history and being called boulder pullers. And they started holding a festival to celebrate. It even built up its own rock collection. Pieces of stone have been gifted to the city from countries and businesses all around the world. (laughing) What a beautiful story. I think the audience has been quite quiet there because they're touched. (laughing) Yeah, that's lovely. I think they're pondering that. What a beautiful story. Boulder City, huh? How about it? (laughing) All right, the answers are in and we are running every time. So I will get stuck into 'em. Here is the final question. What is the plot synopsis of 1993 film "Surfing Engine?" - I will just say, I feel really good about my answer. - Fantastic. All right, option one. A group of corrupt politicians hatch a plan to have one of them run for president in order to steal all of the gold from Fort Knox. The only person that can stop them is a private eye and former boxer, John McGhee, who realizes something is afoot when he gets an anonymous tip off. The eponymous, the eponymous, upon you laugh 'cause that was right or wrong. (laughing) The eponymous surf ninjas only feature in one scene performing at a fundraising event early in the film. That's option one. (laughing) - That's pretty good. - It's a really good opener though. That's good stuff. - Option two. In the 12th century Japan, Hakumi Nakasan has become the most respected ninja in the Osaka clan. When his home village is attacked by a ruthless Ronan, Hakumi vows revenge. When he discovers that the Ronan is fled to one of the small islands in the Japanese archipelago, he realizes there is only one way for him and his fellow ninjas to reach him undetected. Surfing. (laughing) - That's pretty good. - That's option two, option three. Childhood friends, Phineas and Damon discover a dark portal in a haunted house while hiding from the town bully. When they realize that this portal is controlled by the movement of the ocean, they will stop at nothing to change the tides of time. Will Phineas and Damon ever make it out of the portal, or will they be creatures of the deep for the rest of eternity? That's option three. - Lot of perplexed faces in the audience too. - Option four, Johnny and Adam, two brothers who are avid surfers, learned that they are actually the sons of the king of the island nation of Paterson. They are whisked away by a mysterious ninja who takes them on a magical martial arts adventure to save their homeland from the cyborg dictator, Colonel G. - Cyborg. (laughing) - That's a cyborg on a bouncy castle. - Cyborg. (laughing) - You put too many springs in there. (laughing) - Option five, heard of ninjas? Yeah. Well, what if I told you? (laughing) - It's the most animated I've ever seen you miss. - This is 100% what that he wrote. Daddy's really excited to tell himself. - Well, what if I told you these ones surf? That's right, surf's up dudes. Grab your catanas and wax on, wax off your surfboards and get ready to hang tan, cowabunga and konnichiwa dudes. (laughing) - Wow. - That's really good. - That's so full on. - Option six, a group of penguins who love to surf are hanging out on a beach one afternoon when they are set upon by the evil ninja chimps. The chimps, the... - I'm so sorry about that. That's somewhere in the front row laughed at this film. - That's funny about ninja chimps. - Yeah, yeah. - The chimps take their surfboards and the penguins have to learn how to out ninja the chimps. Can they win back their surfboards and learn some new skills a long way? Well, finally, avid mountaineer Aaron Ralston goes hiking at Utah's Canyonlands National Park without telling anyone. After getting his arm trapped under a boulder. (laughing) (laughing) - Yeah, it's very good. (laughing) - 327 hours, he is able to escape by cutting off his own arm. To celebrate his freedom, he goes surfing. He is also a ninja. (laughing) Zach, you're a crack here, final, final question. - I have never had less of an idea of what the answer could be. - Yeah. - Like, for all I know, it is the 127. (laughing) - Can you give us little summaries? - So you've got the crop politicians running for president to steal the gold. You've got the 12th century Japanese powerful ninja who ends up surfing. You've got the childhood friends Phineas and Damon who find a dark portal and have to try and change the tides of time. You've got Johnny and Adam, the two brothers, Avid Serfers, but are also the kings or the sons of the king of Patasan and they're whisked away by a mysterious ninja and is this helping? (laughing) - No, I stopped listening. - Then you've got Cowabunga and Knitewa dudes. - Oh, fuck. - You've got penguins versus chimps and you've got 127 hours. (laughing) - Son. - I was gonna say I'm tossing up between two. The initial thing, one of them is mine. (laughing) But I am tossing up between two and I will let you in on this. I'm tossing up between the time portal one because that just sounds so fucked. I could just see how that could be. - Real nice. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the brother's one, but he's the bad guy and the brother's one. - The cyborg. - The cyborg. (laughing) - That was fully the one I was going for. - Until the cyborg. - Cyborg dictated a Colonel Chee. (laughing) - Oh man. I'm going to watch this film, I think. (laughing) I'm going to go with the cyborg brother's one. - Walked in for Zaki. - I think I've shamed my family. (laughing) - With our poorly, I've done in the Simvan. And I can't wait to come back and reclaim my title. (laughing) - What do you think, Jeff? - I, okay, 'cause I think it might be that I can't see. Even when I do the joke of, I cannot see it. I think it might be the time portal one, but I also want to choose cow or bunga dudes. (laughing) 'Cause I just think that's really funny. - Go with the one you believe, probably. - Oh, okay. (laughing) - It's up to you, hey, look up to you. - I'm going to go the time portal one. - All right, locking that in for Jess, leaving just me. - Is that face because you wanted to go for that? - Well, no, it's because, no, no, no. It's because, so, I wanted to go for cyborg, but now I feel if I go for cyborg, I'm then block it, I don't want anyone to think I'm trying to block Zach. So I'm thinking-- - No, do you? I mean, you're talking about Zaki a valley. - Yeah. - Lock away. - No, I deserve that name. I'm going to be stripped of that title after this, then I have to reclaim it. (laughing) - Because the thing is what's remarkable about this question, what's really truly beautiful about this, is I have absolutely no idea what any one of you wrote, except for 128 days. (laughing) Would it be disappointing if I went for cyborg? I'll ask the audience, would it be disappointing? - Yes. (laughing) - She's asking if you want her to pick the one she thinks is right. Or the one that he probably wrote. Yeah, I'll pick the one Zach probably wrote. - Which one do you think I wrote? - Maybe the politician one. - Mm. - I'm going to go with the politician one. - Politician one? - You don't have to. You don't have to. (laughing) - Maybe I wrote the cyborg one. - Yeah. - Oh. - I'm just having a good time. (laughing) - I'm not trying to win this one. I've gone funny, you don't have to pick the politician one. (laughing) - But I can't pick the cyborg one. I'm going to pick the politician one. - All right, locked in. We really should wrap it up. Here's who wrote the answers, although I'm fucking loving this. (laughing) I feel like I'm in the audience. Just loving every moment of it. All right, here's who wrote the answers. 127 hours, which I like how you turned 10 to 928 days. (laughing) Now that's brutal. (laughing) - Not that he's his arm. - He's his arm is pressed in by the right position. - He's chased by zombies. (laughing) - The penguins and the chimps, I wish it was real, but that was a Jess Perkins original. - Yeah. Ninja chimps. - Kalbunga and Kinichua dudes was the house. - That was so funny. - The house also wrote, in particular David, the question writer, he wrote the 12th century, Japan, Osaka clan, man who took up surfing. Jess, you went for the time portal. That was mesh. - Oh, well done, well. - So really, that maneuvering at the end was really important for the result here. - Yeah. - So what have we got? Mish went for the politicians, which he thought might have been Zack and it was. (laughing) And Zack got the correct answer. (laughing) - Oh my god, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh. We'll find out. So that means so two times three and one times three. - Absolutely, we are one while you're counting up the scores. Let me say, - If you came from behind, I don't think I wanted that. - I will throw myself off this snap. - I didn't know that. - Critics didn't love it. 23% on Rotten Tomatoes, but the audience quite liked it. - I told you you didn't have to pick mine, Mish. - Thank you. - That was, oh man. Because I was the only one who really knew what was going on there. She wanted to look in the right one. - No, it's because once a new Jess had locked mine in, I was going to, I just wanted to fuck him by saying you've picked mine. And then so it was more like a game that I didn't realise it was possible for him to get doubled by it anyway, whatever. - So here's a 68% audience review. There's a five star audience review by Mike G on Rotten Tomatoes. Saw this movie when I was a kid and I've loved it ever since. Yes, the jokes are corny, but it's a kid's movie and come on. It was the nannies. A lot better acting than movies these days. That's a positive review. And then the negative one star review from an actual critic comes from Desmond Ryan and it reads, "What do ninjas and surfers have to do with each other? "You've got me and I heroically sat through all of surf ninjas." LAUGHTER All right Dave, final score time. Let's us check in. In fourth place tonight, on four points, please give it up for Jess Parker! Yeah, that's a hard point. And the only one apart from Matt with a hard point, both of you got hard points. Well done for the hard points. All hard. Yeah. All right. But I should say, in second place, on six points, it's the house, meaning we have a time for seven points. Oh! And second body, and a big one. And a big one for seven points, I think! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE That is so good! Oh my God, this is the best! Congratulations! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE I'm not gonna sleep for weeks! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Oh my God! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Congratulations! Wow. Wow. That's so, you've never beat it in him before, but this is your first time sharing the podium. How does it feel? It has it feel awful. It feels unfinished. I don't feel good about this at all. I stumbled on that last one. I forgot about the double point situation. I thought I knew I was winning, so I was just wanting to fuck with it for no reason. But yeah, whatever, that was fun. LAUGHTER I love this game! Your podcast comes out twice weekly, Zach and Miss? Yeah, it comes out every Tuesday. We do the Mission Zach podcast, and we're just a chatty chat. Just talk about, you know, silly shit, keeps a gas. And then on Thursday, we do Leguizama-Rama, where we talk about something that our favourite actor John Leguizamo has been in, because he has been in everything. And if you're like, "I don't know who that is, yes, you do." Yeah, you do. Give him a Google. Half expect him to be in surf ninjas. Just where can people find you? At my house? No! Do you want to tell people where you live? No! It's $1.77. Stop it, yes. All right, stop. You can do the one, you can find me there. And that's about it. Just Perkins and Dave. Thank you so much for your side-kicking Dave. Thank you so, so much. You can check out BookTube podcast, but also my good work on Channel 31. Thank you so much. Please, big round of applause for Dave, Zach, Miss, and Jess. I've been that should be random applause for everyone working here at Chibel Studios, everyone's friends. That's right, it's your boy. (cheers and applause) Well, hang on. Now, thanks for tuning in to Who Knew and Matt's Short. Now that you know it, I'll be Matt's show it. Goodbye. (cheers and applause) (upbeat music) I think I'm the perfect addition to this. (laughter) 'Cause I couldn't care less. (laughter) I'm usually here to have a good time, but today I'm here to ruin Matt's life. (laughter) Matt's like, he ruined it out. He ruined it out. He just yesterday. (laughter) All right, question all right. I might just stop and take a piss at some point and fuck off for 40 minutes, or something. I thought that was it. Well, I thought that was what you all wanted me to do. And that was true, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but you made the mistake of coming back. (laughter) I feel like I deserve this. (laughter) Bit of fun, bit of fun. Here is question number one. (upbeat music) All right, in modern-- I should have gotten goggles. (laughter) Big wet should have had goggles. Oh, fuck, I missed that bad. Yeah, that's good. Full snorkel. Why? Why do they call you Big Wet? I don't know. Does anyone know? You just have committed to the bit. No one remembers. (laughter) Yeah, no, I don't remember. I think it was like the first or second time I was on, there was a question. And my answer might have been Big Wet, or something like that. And then Matt started calling me Big Wet. And I didn't know that it wasn't meant to happen, but then after that episode was released, I just received people like say it to me out of cars and stuff. (laughter) Which is fine, 'cause it's a fun, but anyone who doesn't know me, who just sees someone called out Big Wet at me, just like at a tramster. (laughter) Um, but no, it's cool. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know if it is good. (upbeat music) Well, Jess is finishing off, my partner collects Hot Wheels. Yeah, no, what a loser. (laughter) No, but he does, he collects them. So whenever we're at like any shopping center, like today, we were at Northland. And like, I had to go to JB High Five, right? Which is something I haven't said since 2009. (laughter) - I had to go to JB High Five. - I had to go to JB High Five. And so he went to Target, and then I went and met him at Target, and it was just him and this giant barrel of Hot Wheels, and like five, seven-year-olds. (laughter) And they're grabbing at them and stuff, like trying to beat each other. I'm like, you were a 40-year-old man. (laughter) Take me home. (laughter) Slurping, slurping, get all of the mini, all of the mini. - That's amazing. - Yeah. - So you've referenced two shopping centers today. Is that, is this a bit of a pet subject for you? - Pet sub, no, I worked in them for a really long time. I worked in retail for ages. And one of my jobs was for six and a half years at Northland. Can you imagine? Is everyone here been to Northland? Has anyone not been to Northland before? You've never been to Northland. Well, like, well done. (laughter) - I'll describe it. - You're better than us. - I'll describe it for people that haven't been just to help them along. It's like, shops. (laughter) - But Northland specifically, Northland-- - It's like lots of shops in the Northern suburbs. - Northland specifically though, like the equivalent, like if Northland was something else, like represented as something else, it would just be piss. (laughter) It's a piss place. I hate it there. - So the shopping center where I grew up in the Littrow Valley was called Mid Valley 'cause it was right in the middle of the valley. (laughter) And when I say the valley, people think like, "Oh, like the valley." Like, no, no, no, no. It's a valley where they mine for coal. (laughter) And they did this thing in the '90s and the 2000s called Mid Valley Gold. And that was instead of vouchers, you could use Mid Valley Gold, but you could only use it about half the shops. And I cannot express to you, Mid Valley Gold, to people who know what Mid Valley Gold is, is the funniest reference I could meet in possibly years, but only a few thousand people know it. And it kills me every day. Like, I just pray that, you know, there's one person from the Littrow Valley streaming or in the audience right now, 'cause to them, great. To everyone else who's like, "Okay, cool, man." (laughter) (upbeat music) - Yeah. - I think so. I was on that and one of you killed me. - Yeah. - Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. We did the red skin shots and I got-- - I got so, okay. We did those red skin shots. I got so fucked. It was a Monday night. I went to Spleen afterwards. I thought I walked in really cool. I was later told I walked in like, "Hey, we're back!" I was shit faced that I made up with a good friend of mine. (laughter) It was a fantastic night. - It was a fantastic night. - It was a fantastic night. (upbeat music) - Oh, this is fun. I'm having fun. I'm having a good time. I'm having a good time flying the game and congrats on new good scores, guys. (laughter) You're actually, you're doing a show later on today. - Hey, thank you so much for the promo. Yeah, Mission Zach are doing leg was armor after this. If anyone, I don't know if there's, I think there are. Maybe come along if there are, have a go. It's, we talk about our favorite character, John Leguizamo, but also we'll just talk shit, talk movies, we're gonna have some fun games. We're just gonna make a fun little live show of it. So, yeah, come along. Thanks for the promo, Matt. - Hey, no worries. I was doing a show right now. Yes. (laughter) Yes, that's so much. Yeah, it's called Who Knew It, Matt Stewart. Got some really great guests on this. - Definitely, come along if you can. (laughter) - And Pop Guys, I think, is on in between the two. And anyone who's got tickets to our shows can come into that one as well. So you can all, if any, especially if you're hanging around for their show after, come and see Pop Guys in between. Just let them know that you have tickets to this show and you can get into that. - If you want. - Yeah, Shark is, Shark, yeah, woo. - It's also, and also it's our first ever live podcast. We've never done one, so it's a Pop Guys, actually. - Is it? - Yeah, so back to back. - It's our two. (laughter) Yeah, no, it's our first ever one. And Pop Guys, first ever one. So if you wanna support us, that'd be lovely, please. - Two, first ever ones in a row. - And we have prizes. That's why I was at JB Hi-Fi. (gasps) - Misha, Misha, you're coming off as desperate. (laughter) (laughter) - The prize is a DVD. (laughter) Most of them don't have DVD plans. - That's the joke. - It looks like all three are still riding. - Oh, one answer is currently coming out, so we're getting closer. - That's fantastic. Any questions? You're all good? - What are you riding on your phone there? - You just pointed at someone who said any questions. (laughter) And they said, "Nah, I'm good." - Who are you saying they were rude? 'Cause I thought that was fair enough. - I thought you were being really cool and fly. And yeah, that was a little rude of them. - Any questions? - Yeah. The fuck is wrong with you? (laughter) - I don't really know. - Oh, I forgot to fuck around. - What do you mean? - No, I fucked around a little bit. - Yeah. - I meant to ruin your life, like you ruined mine yesterday. - It's funny because this is probably the best behavior you've ever been on this podcast. (laughter) - And I need to remind you, I'm quite sick. And that's why. - You're fully sick. - And I'm fully sick. - 'Cause normally you really do break the game and... - Zach's right, I'm cheeky. - Yeah, you're very cheeky. Very cheeky. - I actually never noticed. Did you guys know I'm cheeky? You got... (laughter) - Do you guys know? Chicky devil. Maybe I could be like, "LDR blow" or something. (laughter) - Sent. - Ooh. - Got it. - That lays only one. - Mitch, would you call me "LDR blow"? - If you asked me to. - Mitch, would you please call me "LDR blow"? - Yeah. (laughter) - Nah, we can do better, we can do better, we can do better. - What does that mean? - 'Cause I said, "I said I'm a cheeky devil." - That means the cheeky one, does it? - No. (laughter) - But what it was, so why? "LDR blow", that means the diabolical or something. - Does anyone here speak another language other than English that could say "the cheeky devil" in a different language? - Oh, that's smart. - Oh, come on now. (laughter) You're all at a doo go on and do new at LivePod, you're smart. Some of you speak other languages. - Oh, it's dirty. - Really? - Google, I'm sorry. - Yeah, it's dirty, Google. - What's a cool language? - Español. (laughter) (laughter) - That's actually how you say it in their tongue. (laughter) - Huh, it's diabolo. (laughter) - I just looked up, what is the coolest language and number one is Spanish, so there you go. - There you go. - There you go. - Yeah, put some birds, great film. (laughter) - I've heard that's genuinely pretty good. - Yeah, I've fallen asleep to it on a plane, but I did enjoy it 'til that point. - Did you ever watch the TV show "Puss in Boots?" - No. - That was not good. - Okay. - Okay. - I've got a board at that one. - I got a board at that one. - Which character star didn't-- - Two episodes. - Two episodes of it. - Antonio. - No. - Banderas. - No. - No, I guess. - Who could it be? (laughter) - Could it be Brendan Fraser? - No. - No. - Because you would not. - Puss in boots. - But you don't know. - Puss in boots. - Is it Puss related? - No. - No. - Boots related? - No. - No. - Is it someone from Boot Man? - Just three musicals. - Just three musicals. - And Gase. - Gase. - Gase. - Gase. - I love Adam Gase. - Yeah. - He was so good in Coyote Ugly. - How good was he in Coyote? - Gase. - I'm like nobody got mad at his girlfriend for having a job. - Yes. (laughter) - My favorite thing about Coyote Ugly is he keeps his accent, but they didn't write it for the accent. So he's like, oh, let's go down to the, like he doesn't say "Pose". Let's go to the bar. - Yeah. - I was born and raised in Brooklyn. (laughter) - Okay. - I'm walking here. (laughter) - They didn't even do a line like he started in Australia. - No, no. - But also like, his accent is right because he is Australian, but it sounds fake. And you realise about, as you're watching it, you're like, oh, it's because the lines aren't written. - Yeah. - Like, it's just so strange. - You know, the 10 things I had about you, Heath Ledger was cast, obviously. And they were like, we don't want you to do an American accent because it's sexier. Your Aussie accent is sexier. - Which is so funny. - Agreed. - Yeah. - Yeah, fuck. - But that's a good answer. - That's a fun little bit of trivia. You can take that with you. - You have it. - My favorite favorite friends. - My favorite friends. - And they want to root straight away, honestly. (laughter) (upbeat music) - Selling a little. Or a lot. Shopify helps you do your thing, however you cha-ching. Shopify is the global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business. From the launch your online shop stage to the first real-life store stage, all the way to the did we just hit a million orders stage, Shopify is there to help you grow. 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