Who Knew It with Matt Stewart

114 - Geraldine Hickey and Lloyd Langford

Who Knew It with Matt Stewart is a comedy game show podcast hosted by Australian comedian Matt Stewart. This episode features Geraldine Hickey (Melbourne International Comedy Festival Most Outstanding Show) and Lloyd Langford (Taskmaster)!

This episode was recorded live at the Caxton Street Comedy Festival at Good Chat Comedy in Brisbane - cheers to Cale Donadelli for being the scorer/my rock!

Check out Matt's stand up special: https://youtu.be/cWStRpI-BhE

Support the show via http://patreon.com/dogoonpod and you can submit questions for the show!

See the podcast/Matt live: https://www.mattstewartcomedy.com/

Check out Matt's podcast network: https://dogoonpod.com/

Theme song by Evan Munro-Smith, Logo by @muzdoodles and edited by Connor Schmidt!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Duration:: 58m
Broadcast on:: 17 Nov 2024
Audio Format:: other

Hello, Matt here, letting you know that I've got some shows coming up in Brisbane. We're doing a live, who knew it, and I'm also doing a stand-up show in my show, Ding, at the Caxton Street Festival in the 19th of October. And then I'm going to be in Geelong, working on an hour of new material on the 31st of October at the brewery there. Geez, I'm looking forward to that. Then, of course, I'm flying over with my friends, Jess and Dave, to do a tour of Europe, for Dewgo On, but at the end of that tour, I'm doing three who knew it shows with stand-up as well. In London on the 17th of November, Leicester on the 21st of November, and Edinburgh on the 23rd of November. Cannot wait to do all of these shows. Hopefully, we'll see you there. You can find tickets at mattstuitcomedy.com. Mattstuitcomedy.com. To remind you that 60% of sales on Amazon come from independent sellers, the former Bob of Princeton Popcorn. Howdy. We'll read 60% of this ad. Fire away, Bob. Small business owners like myself are growing their businesses faster on Amazon. By getting help with things like shipping. Shop small business on Amazon. Especially Princeton Popcorn. Amazon, everyday better. Welcome to Who Knew and Mattsture, the show where the guests are on the Tichler Mattsture. And our first guest this week is the winner of the most outstanding show at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival 2021, it's Geraldine Hickey. I won the year after the Comedy Festival was cancelled when there was no international acts. Our second guest this week, Geraldine, is the winner of Season 2 of Taskmaster Australia. It's Lloyd Langford. I double check with Lloyd if I could say that in case it was a spoiler. And he said he has that hate from that in the past. Is that true? Yeah, because I announced the news obviously when it happened. And for some reason that made a lot of people angry. They were like, "We're in North America and we haven't watched it yet." And I was like, "I don't give a fuck. What am I supposed to do? Wait for you?" Yeah, let us know when you're ready for me to announce small, large achievement. No, I mean, it's also like an irrelevant achievement. Like I was, I didn't get, there's the only extra thing you get is a gold head of Tom Gleason. Whoa. Where is it? Where is it? It's in a fucking cupboard somewhere. I mean, they would scare the guests, dress it up. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, that's good. I'm going to, I'll chop it off the plinth and cover it in blood. Dress it up with blood. That's beautiful. Also, our score keeper slash co-host from the back of the room is Good Chat's very own car. Cale, Donna Deli. My nickname for Cale is Carl. Yeah. That's a cute thing. I normally don't do that on mic, but backstage and stuff I call him, Carl. Are you on mic, Cale? I am, I'm on mic, I'm going to call you. I feel like I've made a powerful enemy. How's it going, Carl? You having fun up there? Yeah, good day, mate. Great day. So good to be here at the Kaxon Street Comedy Festival. But, geez. Oh, Kaxon the street. I thought you said, sorry. Yeah. Sorry. Yeah. So the way the show works is asked a relatively obscure trivia question. Now, contestants have to write a convincing fake answer. I then read their answers. Well, it's a real one. I'll have to guess which one is correct. And the first question comes from listener Emily from Lobathol in South Australia. And the question is, what is the meaning of the following Gaelic insult? Oh. And I have not-- you're good, you're pretty big. Is there much crossover in Welsh and Gaelic language? Yes. I am not a student of linguistics. I think the thing that ties the Irish and the Welsh and the Scots together is our deep, deep hatred of the English. And the Australians, mate. All right, so this is the Gaelic insult. And I was not able to find a pronunciation, so I'm just going to do my best. So what does that translate into in English? It's an Irish insult or curse, drop-ed, chugget legoth. Well, they're writing their answers. I'll explain how the score works. Does anyone not heard this show before? Fucking hell. Well, I don't know. I hardly need to explain it to you in the room. But for people listening at home assuming this is releasable, this is how it works. You get one point if your fake answer is guessed by the other contestant, another point, if you correctly, guess the answer. And by the way, I'm also playing, "There's the house." OK, it's funny, I've probably done half a dozen or more live shows. It hurts every time. Anyway, I've put into my own fake answer with the help of the question writers. And I get a point for each one of those that I guess choose. So each of us can go up to two points per round, which seems fair, but the probability actually favours me. The house. The house always wins, though, if you've listened before, and you all have. You'll know that is really the case, actually. Find a round's worth of triple points for the guests, really, just to even things up for them. Anyway, most of our questions come from our great Patreon supporters. If you want to submit a question, sign up on any level via patreon.com/2gon, pod linked in the show. It's any patrons in. Oh, Andy, who's not? Who's not? Hands up. Show you. Let's boo them. Yeah. All right. It looks like the answers are in here is question number one. What is the meaning of the following Gaelic insult or curse? Rockard. Trigger. Lego. Hope our Irish listeners enjoyed my nailing of that. Here are your options. Option one. Drop a bag of nuts in your overgrown bum. Option two. May you be badly positioned on a windy day. Option three. I hope you trip over a hedgehog and break your teapot. That's a bit much, actually. Option four. Go and build a new dwelling in your mother's every bum. Or finally. May you never know the paternity of your dog's offspring. OK. You don't need to know any way, don't worry about it. What do you want to go first, Chez? The option to read that out to me again. May you be badly positioned on a windy day? I liked that one. Lock that one in? Because that made, like, you know, if you're badly positioned and the wind changes, you're stuck. That's, yeah, and that feels Irish to me. Like, they would believe that. They'd probably start a bit. What do you think, Lloyd? Can you read me through the two bum ones? Drop a bag of nuts in your overgrown bum, or go and build a new dwelling in your mother's hairy bum. What do you want? I feel like a lot of the Celtic-based insults are bum-based. And I think drop the bag of hairy nuts in your bum. That one. OK. Lock that in for Lloyd. So here is who wrote the answers. May you never know the paternity of your dog's offspring? That was the house. Go and build a new dwelling in your mother's hairy bum. That was Lloyd Langford. May you trip over a hedgehog and break your teapot? That was Emily A.K., the house. Drop a bag of nuts in your overgrown bum. Lloyd went for that. That was jazz. I'm not high-fiving. No, come on, because we talked about bums. And that also means you are correct, jazz. May you be badly positioned on a windy day is correct. That just sounded too modern to me. Do you reckon? Yeah. What's the way a windy? What's wrong with that? Like wind is famously old. The phrasing of it. Badly positioned. Yeah, but what's modern to me? If I was a medieval Gaelic peasant, I wouldn't be using that kind of terminology. Well, they don't, they say. Yeah. You'd be putting it differently. I, um, drunk-ed, shocked, like, good. Yeah. You'd say it more like that, you know. Yeah. So that means maximum two points for Geraldine Hickey in round one. Thank you. Speaking of the Irish, the next question comes from Paul McNally from Waterford in Ireland. And the question is, which of these are real species of fish? So you've just got to come up with a fake species of fish. Now, does everyone here know that Geraldine Hickey is like a bird expert? I was going to write a bird question. No, next bird. Not an, I'm just, I like, I like birds. But aren't you like, you like birds and you're an official ambassador for birds? Well, I, there's- Not for birds in general, but- Not for birds in general. Well, you know, the Aussie bird- Are you, you spoke first of a big bird? No, Mr Snuffler. But, the Aussie bird count is happening now and I'm an ambassador for that. So you get the app out and finishes tomorrow, though. So I've got to do a fish. Yes, you do a fish. Yes. That's anyway, I was just saying I was going to ask a bird question, but I'd do Zeke because- Yeah, she's already two up. Come on. Hey, while you're writing your answers, Jez, here's some more info about Irish curses. Apparently the direct Google translation, Lord, maybe this makes more sense to you. Bad weather for you on a windy day. Yeah. Yeah. I would have guessed that. You would have guessed that. Yeah, yeah. We're just going to give a name of fish. Just the name of a fish. I don't have to describe it or anything. Oh, right. According to the nine arrow blog in a 1768 Irish Dictionary recorded by Bishop John O'Brien, there are over 10 nouns in Irish for a curse. Cursing was a serious business in Ireland, and despite the oath acts of 1635 and 1695, which outlawed the use of profane swearing and cursing, it remained. In fairness, it's not hard to see why taking a look back through Irish history between colonization, famine, mass immigration and war, there were a fair few things to curse about. Emily writes, according to a study on preply.com, Irish people swear most commonly at themselves. It's both an art and a science with evidence showing that swearing is linked to physical emotional and social benefits, including heightened pain tolerance and increased physical strength. How about that? What? You swear you get? Yeah. On my recent 41st birthday, myself and my partner and our toddler daughter, Gwen, went to a pub for a lunch, and when the waitress brought out the lunch, Gwen, who's two and a half, said at the top of her voice, "Fuck my god." Look at them chips. Genuinely the best present I've ever received. That's beautiful. I know. I've never said "Fuck my god" in my entire life, and I'm saying it all the time, though. I want to hear the Gaelic version. All right, the answers are in for question number two. Which of these are real species of fish, the bearded snub, stripe-fined goober, convict surgeon fish, corn-banded flounder, flounder, or Gregory Grub? So you got bearded snub, stripe-fined goober, convict surgeon fish. Gregory Grub, or corn-banded flounder. Who went first last time? I think it's your turn, Jess. No, I went first last time. I could remember the one question we've done. Remember back to that last question? No. Lloyd, do you want to go? I think there is a type of fish called a surgeon fish, and I'm trying to think what it would have done to get a prison type. That's a brad, probably. I will go for that, the convict surgeon fish. Okay, I'm looking at him for Lloyd. I did like that answer as well. I don't know, it just seemed to stick out a bit, but just for fun, I'll go to Greg's. Gregory Grub? Gregory Grub. Good on you. If there really is a fish called Gregory Grub, I'll be looking that up, and thank you for bringing it to my attention. All right, here's your right, the answers. Beaded snub, that was Paul, the questioner order, the house. Corn-banded flounder, that was Jess, and I'm sorry for saying it wrong. Yeah, no, you fucked it, but that's fine. Yes, there's a surgeon fish, but there's also a flounder, you know, I'll put that in there. Big gold flounder. And I just want to be basic with the corn-banded, what is that? Nothing. A striped finned goober, that was Lloyd. Is a goober a real kind of fish? Sounds like it could be. No, you told me to make up a fish. I just believed it, that's all. Oh my, that sounds real to me. Gregory Grub, Jess went for that, unfortunately that was the house. That is a man who lives in Tasmania. That's his real name. I heard about him, I was at this, in this backyard party, and I heard a second conversation going on about a local, like, businessman called Gregory Grub, and I turned my full body away from the conversation I was in, and I was like, can I hear more about this man? There's a real man out there called Gregory Grub going about his business. What is this business? I don't know. You don't know the business. No. We're about to send Tasmania. I think it's around Hobart. All right. Yeah. I'll be there next weekend. Great. Well, I'm still going to look up Gregory Grub. And that means Lloyd is correct, it's a convict surgeon fish. Well played. So Kayle, that means it's one point for the house and one point for Lloyd. Do you want to give us a quick score update? I can do that, mate. Jess on two. Lloyd on one. House on one. Thank you so much. That was a real polite round of applause. I think because they'd already done the muffer marks. They were like, we've got this. Let's get another question. Come on. All right. Question number three. This comes from Ian Irving from Belfast and the question is, what is the name of the video game released by KFC in 2019? So you got to give us the name and just like a sentence about the premise of the game as well, the name of the game and the premise of the game. What was the name of a real video game released by KFC in 2019? While you're writing your answers, I'll let the audience know a bit more about convict surgeon fish. According to animaldiversity.org, they are also known as convict tangs and manini. I mean, fucking imagine having three options. Things like that for yourself. My name is Matt. My parents, I'm going to call them later, but imagine that, convict tangs steward. It's not too low. They have a pale body color varying from white, greenish, white to gray or even yellow. It's a really interesting to hear all these details, I'm sure. In the studio, this is fine, but when I'm reading it, I'm bored when I'm reading it and saying you're like, why are you telling us this? Are there vertical black stripes, including one going through each eye? They are highly, laterally compressed and have small scales, gill rakers, dorsal spines and anal spines. Sounds dangerous. Their average length is 17 centimetres, not bad, and maximum length of 27. All right, some of the surgeon fish species, including this one, contain a hallucinogenic compound. Ingestion can lead to people tripping out for hours and even days at a time. This peculiar effect is called ichtiotoxicity, which means fish toxicity. Just say that then. Like Paul, just say it like that. I can't listen and write at the same time. Like having to write a synopsis for a video game, like trying to think, what's the language that they use for, and how do I get, like, it's a game with the unknown. I'll shout out, but I can take it, take it to it. No, no, no, that's good, because no one wants to sit in silence while I talk. Let me show the audience a look at the fish, I'll quietly do this, but I'll tell you what, that's a beautiful fish. I've only just realized that the convict thing is because of the straps. That makes a lot of sense. It's a beautiful fish, have a look at this. Oh, hello, hello, oh yeah, oh yeah. That to be honest looks like a flounder to me, that flounder is the fish from the little mermaid. Even righting in the middle of a fish before. Yeah, this one's got a tap. Which is... That doesn't get a literal watermark. Go fuck yourself, didn't clap with that. The wild thing is, the watermark is getfishing.com.au, which is wild to promote that. Does a fish? I don't know what I thought you'd be, very anti-fishing, but there you go. All right, the answers are in. So here is question number three. What is the name of a real video game released by a KFC in 2019 and what is the premise? KFC Revenge, a game in which you play a chicken, plays a chicken armed with a gravy gun fighting your way past staff to escape a KFC restaurant and defeat the colonel? That's option one, option two. Cluck me. This one is, Colonel Sanders asked you to prepare chickens for his busy restaurant at speed. Option two, option three, beef bomber. That's a game in which you are captured by an evil clown and is heard of cows, subtly educating you about the environmental impact that cattle industry has had on the environment and the poor conditions, other fast food restaurants, keep them in. Number four, buckle up bucket hat, complete tasks to get a bucket hat to buckle up and go to the cricket. How's the different time, 2019? Simple at time. Or finally, I love you, Colonel Sanders, a finger licking good dating simulator. This is a dating simulator in which you, a catering student, try and get the attention of the hottest and most talented guy in class, Colonel Harlan Sanders. Okay, so back to you, Jazz. All right. I'm going to eliminate the vegetarian one because none of us had time to write out that essay. That's the beef bummer. Yeah, the beef one's out. I like the, what's the set, the one where you've got to get the food out quick? That is. Cluck me. Yeah. Cluck me. I reckon. I'll go. I like Cluck me. Cluck me. What about you, Lloyd? Well, the first one was like anti-KFC, you have to escape the chicken house. I also noticed that as I was reading it out. Yeah. Yeah. So I'll discount that one. Okay. Well, I don't, I mean, I, I, I, I think a dating simulator for Colonel Sanders feels unlikely. Okay. He's a dead man. And when he was alive, he did not look good. We're going to this game and he looked finger looking good. Was it called beef bummer, like B-U-W-M-E-R? Yeah. I'm going to go with that one. Okay. I think they've, I think some new sort of crazy intern, a KFC, possibly under the influence of cocaine has developed this anti-McDonald's game for a laugh. Oh, yeah. What, what kind of cash do you think the interns are on? I cast the intern on cocaine. It's one of the secret herbs and spices. That's why it's finger looking good. I rub it on my gums. Gum, gum, numbing good. Alternative tagline. All right. Here's the right, the answers. You were right to suggest the first one, which was about how KFC was bad. The chicken Toronto escaped. That was E-N-A-K, the house. Then we had buckle up, bucket hat, complete tasks to get a bucket hat, to buckle up and go to the cricket. That was jazz. I love that. Thank you. That was believable. If I didn't know the real answer, that's the one I would have guessed. Yeah. But, and if I could concentrate, I would have come up with a better, like I loved the title and I was very happy with the title and then I went, oh, I don't know what the game is. I don't know. What else do we have? We had jazz. You went for Cluck Me. Oh shit. Colonel Sanders has to prepare chickens at speed. That was Lloyd. Oh, well done. Does it feel like a real game? I loved it. Lloyd went for beef bummer, which jazz discounted straight away. Shit. Lloyd went for it anyway. That was E-N, the question right, okay, the house. Ooh. But yeah, that very, it makes sense and Auntie McDonald's own bit of fun, but would you believe it? The correct answer is, I love you Colonel Sanders, a figure looking for a dating simulator. Uh, apparently it's not a very good game, but, um, apparently. Uh, so Lloyd gets a point there, the house gets a point, um, Kyle, if, uh, I mean, everybody's good too. Yeah, he's correct, so that is it. We've got a human calculator on today, bloody hell. You, man, your mind is beautiful. Uh, all right, well, let's skip Friday to question four then. This one comes from Ashley Dickinson from Bradford in West Yorkshire. And the question is, either of you familiar with the work of Chuck Tingle? Yes. You are, yeah. It's an erotic fiction writer, kind of bizarro, erotic fiction writer, jazz. How do you know that? Well he, he, he's like a meme, right? He wrote all these self published, all these insane books about various crazy sexual scenarios. That's right. Yes. Published them on Amazon and they became like a cult. Yes. And he's anonymous. He wears like a pink balaclava, that's his, that, that's his look. Um, so you're in a, probably a better position here than Lloyd, but the question is. What is the title of the erotic Chuck Tingle self published book, which was put out on the 29th of May 2018? Oh, okay. Yeah. No bird questions. He played straight into Lloyd's hands, famously a big Chuck man. Um, I'm aware of, I haven't read any of the books. So while you're writing your answers, just the title. Yep. Uh, while you're writing your answers, he's a little more info about, I love you Colonel Sanders. This is according to Ian from Belfast. This game features a sexy Colonel Sanders said seriously, Google it. That sexy piece of man meat or more aptly poultry makes it worth every penny. By the way, it's free, but I have looked up the pictures for you. And, oh my God, he is a little bit, he's a bit of a dream. That's not the real Colonel sense. That's not, that's not the real. There we go. Look at this guy. What do you think? Not my type still. Yeah, I mean, he, that's a, he's a silver fox there. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. That's taking a few liberties, I reckon, like that brought him back to law. All right, while you're still writing, let's go for a quick break. Kenny's family healthcare benefits kicked in the day he started his hourly job at Amazon. But two kids, he was a big fan of that. Then he took advantage of Amazon's on-the-job skills training program that helped him launch a new career in software development. He didn't like that too. That led to a bigger paycheck. So he was able to get his youngest son a, drummo please, drum set. Next up, drum lessons. Learn more at about amazon.com, Amazon, Everyday Better. Okay, answers are in. You're a lot of your wood, it was very quick. So here is question number five. What is the title of the erotic Chuck Tingle book published on the 29th of May, 2018? Please insert coin in my butt. Tickle my feathers and balls. A pound a day keeps the butt okay. I was lovingly and repeatedly penetrated by a Tyrannosaurus Rex or finally, so I married my minimum chips. Sitting a stride my deep fried broad. That's. Let's say that last one again. That's all part of the same one I should say. So I married my minimum chips, sitting a stride my deep fried broad. So I got please insert coin in my butt, tickle my feathers and balls. That's option two, option three, a pound a day keeps the butt okay. Option four, I was lovingly and repeatedly penetrated by a Tyrannosaurus Rex or finally, so I married my minimum chips, sitting a stride my deep fried broad. Yeah, what do you see, Lord? Chips is in like hot chips. Hot chips, yeah, yeah. You don't have minimum chips and whales? No. Is that the smallest portion of chips you can get? That's the smallest, yeah. Yeah, that's only a lot of chips. It's only from the fish and chip shop, like you wouldn't go to like KFC now, some minimum chips, you'd just like get all, yeah, minimum chips in a flake. Isn't it minimum? Yeah. Like the smallest amount of chips. Yeah. Yeah, but just a box. Okay. It's like, why else is big on fish and chips, isn't it? Yeah, you just sound like a small chips. In a lot of ways, that makes more sense. Because like technically, if you go, I'd like minimum chips, like you could give you just one chip. No, that's minimum chip. I'd have to give you two. I'm familiar with vaguely familiar with Tingle's work, and I'll go for the chips one. I don't know. They seem to have bizarre scenarios of like sexual relationships with inanimate objects. Yes. But now I'm saying it out loud. I don't think he's Australian and he's not going to know what minimum chips have either. So I'll go for a definite wrong answer. Where is he from? I think he's American. American. It's not in Wales. It's probably in America. I'm sure they have minimum chips over there. I like minimum chips. They don't do minimum anything over there. It was the most oddest one. And if you've got a feeling on it, you can trust that feeling. And I, you know him. So I'm going to go with the same. I mean, they're all pretty strange. Yeah, but there's a different level of strain. Tickle my feathers and balls. Let's go feathers who can also write a book. Powder day keeps the butt OK. What does that even mean? Lovingly repeatedly penetrative on t-rex. Oh, yeah, not like, not like a unit of currency. Oh, it's a pounding. OK. That does change. That makes it make way more sense. And that keeps the butt OK, which is not good. That's not bad. It's just fine. A pout of day keeps you know about right. Depending on what lube you use. Right. So you are both going for the minimum chips. Yeah. I mean, I feel like I've led you down the garden pass. It doesn't matter. OK. All right, here's the right, the answers. Please insert a coin in my butt. That was actually OK at the house. Well done. Tickle my feathers and balls. And I should, I don't know if I, did I say this right, Jazz? Because there was a, there was a dot. No, yeah, you got it right. But also, like, of course that was me. Like you, I went, I'll talk about birds and with birds. Tickle my feathers, dot, dot, dot. And balls. Yeah, I've just added that on just to throw you off the scent. You could tell that Lloyd knew the work of Chuck, because this feels like a Chuck title. I was lovingly and repeatedly penetrated by a T-rex. I'm sure he's written something similar to that. Unfortunately for you two, so I married my minimum, chips, sitting astride, my deep fried bride. That was the house. Oh, well done, how? Meaning the correct answer was probably disappointing in the end. A pound a day keeps the butt OK. Mrs. Tingle in the audience. All right, so we've got two questions to go. That means I should say to Kayle that the scoring there was two points for the house. Oh, no. Do you want to give us a score update, Lloyd? 4-2-2. All right, second last question here. This one comes from three different people sent this through independently. Patrick J. Early from Bendigo, Lewis Gammel from Glasgow, and Nick Dennis from Adders, Pennsylvania, all from different countries as well. And the question is, what was the unusual name of the Florida fire chief cum drug dealer who mysteriously disappeared in the 1970s? A cum drug dealer? This might be another Australian turn of phrase. Minimum cum. Pre-cum, that's gold. So he was a fire chief in Florida, who then got done for stealing drugs and he disappeared in the 70s. So really, it's just a name. He's got an interesting name. That's all you need to give us. Does that make sense? While your answer being written, here's some more info about a pound a day keeps the butt OK. I haven't read this yet. I'm looking forward to hearing what this story is about. Amazon readers give it a rating of 4.9 stars out of 5. Gordon of the books blurb. Time is a mysterious and elusive thing. An experienced lover that's been around for a while. That's tough. It's no wonder time is so alluring in all of its forms, especially the days of the week that we've all experienced our fair share of-- haven't we, though? We've all experienced our fair share of days of the week. Collected within this volume is a hardcore erotic tale for every handsome, physically manifested day. Featuring the following gay erotic tales. Monday pounds me in the butt. Tuesday pounds me in the butt. Wednesday pounds me in the butt. Thursday pounds me in the butt. Friday pounds me in the butt. Saturday-- I'm waiting for the twist. I don't know if there's going to be one. Saturday pounds me in the butt. And finally, Sunday pounds me in the butt. I did find-- here's the-- here's the-- the books cover. Do you want to-- how would you describe that, Lloyd? Have you read this one? No. It's a sort of bare-chested man given two thumbs up and behind him are two bare-chested manifestations of days of the week. Yeah, I think you've absolutely nailed that. Well done. All right, the answer in for question number five. What was the unusual name of the Florida fire chief come drug dealer who mysteriously disappeared in the 1970s? Randy Hamleg. Gary Smokehouse. Bum Fato. Captain Derek Ketamine. Or Wayne D'Wap. I love them all. I think we're back to you, Jazz. Yeah, what? Spill the-- what's Wayne's last name? D'Wap, D-W-O-P. I mean, that's fun. And what-- say them all again. In reverse order, Wayne D'Wap, Captain Derek Ketamine. Bum Fato. Bum, just bum. Bum. Bum. Gary Smokehouse or Randy Hamleg. I'll go, Gary. Gary Smokehouse. Beautiful name. Sounds like-- to me, it sounds like the name of a Tasmanian businessman. It's got Gary Smoke, but I'll just-- no, I'll go, Wayne. I'll change my mind. I like Wayne. Wayne D'Wap. Yeah, that's fun. All right. Looking in Wayne D'Wap for Jazz, what do you think, Lloyd? I am going to plump, not for the first time, Bum Fato. [LAUGHTER] I feel like-- I don't feel like he was Chris and Bum. I feel like his name was William Fato or something. And they have fire people, firemen and ladies. He got Chris and-- Yeah, they give him a nickname. They're like-- he's called Fato, so we'll call him Bum. OK. All right, here's our other answers. Randy Hamleg. That was Lloyd. Man, that was a beautiful name. I thought about it. Beautiful name. Beautiful name. Derek Ketamine, who's Jeff? [LAUGHTER] I put a captain at the start. Captain Derek Ketamine. Yeah, that's-- I'd go see that movie. Yeah. The least inspiring of all the superheroes. [LAUGHTER] No, not a superhero. He's Captain-- Derek Ketamine, he started as a firefighter. And then he looked at his name. Oh, it's in the name. I've got to get into other business. [LAUGHTER] Gary Smokehouse was Patrick, the questioner on R.A.K., the house. Nick, another one of the questioner writers, wrote Wayne D'Wop. What-- oh, you-- whoa. Meaning the correct answer is Bum Fato. [LAUGHTER] [APPLAUSE] So a point for Lloyd and a point for the house. Thank you, Kale. Kale, could you get to the score update before Lloyd could do the maths? Thank you, Abacus. Jaz, bring not the rear on two. Yeah, it started well. It did. Lloyd on three, and the house is getting away on five. Whoa. [LAUGHTER] Oh, OK, they still hate me. Well, you'll be glad to know, audience, that final round is worth triple points for the guests, whereas the house can only score single points. So it's truly still anyone's game. Here we go. Final question comes from Jason Worsner from Chester Springs, Pennsylvania. And the question is, what is the synopsis of the 1985 film Zone Troopers? So you've just got to-- this one will be your longest answer. Lloyd, it's about a paragraph. Yep. Three or four sentences, but you probably know what it. [LAUGHTER] What's the letter at the start of the-- Yeah. Yeah, yeah. [LAUGHTER] I only say that occasionally because the listener once messes in, you really need to let them know what size of paragraph you're talking about. Because it's a paragraph. They could be, you know, what's a minimum paragraph, or whatever. [LAUGHTER] All right. So they're writing the synopsis of the 1985 film Zone Troopers. While they're doing that, here's some more info about Fato. This is from an article in the Miami Herald titled, Come Home, Bum, You Missed. [LAUGHTER] Which was published June 19, 1978. Bum Fato, key west flamboyant ex-fire chief, and now a famous fugitive and felon, is alive and well and living in Spain. Or so some say. [LAUGHTER] Only the rumors remain since the colourful chief disappeared three days after he was convicted of sale and delivery of marijuana and cocaine, stemming from the September crackdown, known as Operation Conch. Fato became the most celebrated the 18 Operation Conch, defendants, and one of the few who were actually convicted. He skipped 25 grand bail on February the 15th, and he rented a car and drove north out of Key West, and he hasn't been heard from since. Friends of the missing fire chief say he got his nickname, oh my god, Lloyd, you're right. When he was a little boy, he used to hang around the old number one fire department on Green Street all the time, and the firemen started calling him The Little Bum. He was always bumming things, asking for favours, like little kids do. That means it's a coincidence. It had nothing to do with Fato. [LAUGHTER] That's crazy. That would have been the obvious route. The article then goes on to describe novelity shirts that have become popular in the late '70s with the words, where is Bum Fato? And the answer is Bums Away. [LAUGHTER] There's a mental floss article about it, which writes, "The only real evidence that Fato may have successfully fled the country came in 1980 when reports emerged out of Costa Rica that Fato had been seen at the US Embassy renewing his passport." I mean, that feels like it's pretty good. Like they should have a record of that, shouldn't they? Authorities showed Fato's photo to residents of Gulfito. Six of them recognized Fato and believed he had been living in Costa Rica until 1979 when the FBI began pressuring the country to oust American fugitives, whether Fato was actually there, or where he went, next is unknown. In 1986, Fato's wife, Esther-- I imagine that, Bum and Esther, a mismatch. Anyway, Esther successfully had her estranged husband declared legally dead so she could pursue insurance claims. But in Key West, his legend still persists. A musical based on his life premiered on the island in 2022. And in the Key West Firehouse Museum, visitors can view Fato's desk and a few of his uniforms. I'm putting that on my travel itinerary. All right, final question. What is this? Oh, no, yeah. You read the name. [LAUGHTER] You've already done it. You've nailed it. Now you just get to enjoy the ride. Final question. What is the synopsis of the 1985 film Zone Troopers? A ragtag team of American soldiers are lost behind enemy lines in World War II when they discover an alien spaceship that is crash landed in the woods. The Nazis seek to capture the aliens' technology and use it to win the war. But things start heating up when the aliens join forces with the Americans. Well, I wonder if I had time to write that. [LAUGHTER] I'm ruling out as being jazzed. It was far too coherent. [LAUGHTER] Second option. In 2097, North America is split into 100 zones. It is forbidden to travel between zones. They are patrolled by bloodthirsty robot guards. Can form a mercenary Steve Best travel from the top to the bottom zone to deliver much-needed medicines to his beautiful and slender wife? [LAUGHTER] Neither Lloyd or Jazz have played before, so I should tell you the movies are never good. [LAUGHTER] That's option two, option three. A struggling high school basketball team is on the brink of disbanding when they discover a secret training facility hidden in their town. With the help of an eccentric coach and an array of unconventional training methods, the team transforms into a powerhouse on the court. As they overcome personnel and athletic challenges, they find themselves in the championship game facing off against the top team in the region. Their journey is one of redemption, teamwork, and triumph against the odds. That's option three. Option four, a school crossing supervisor goes missing and dysfunctional-- [LAUGHTER] Excuse me. [LAUGHTER] I'm trying to read out a Hollywood synopsis right now. A school crossing supervisor goes missing, and a dysfunctional band of misfits are left in charge of maintaining the speed limit in a school zone. [LAUGHTER] Well, finally, a specialized military unit is deployed to a remote desert zone where a top secret government experiment has gone awry. Releasing a series of unexplained phenomena as they investigate the encounter bizarre and dangerous occurrences that threaten their lives and sanity. The same must unravel the mystery behind the experiment and contain the escalating threats before the situation. Sparles out of control. Oh. What's it called? Zone troopers. Zone troopers. Zone troopers, 1985. I like whether or not it's right or not. Just this beautiful-- Slender one. Slender one. And whoever wrote that deserves a point. Locking it in, I think that's probably the one that I want to see the most. Houselander. So many questions remain. Slender enough to need medicines. [LAUGHTER] What do you think, Lloyd? I very much enjoy the school crossing one in that they didn't try and find the crossing guard. [LAUGHTER] They weren't like he's missing. Let's go and find him there. Like he's missing. Now I guess we have to do his job. [LAUGHTER] He's dead to us now. I think the final one about the guys in the day to uncover something or other. All right. Locking that in for Lloyd. Here's who wrote the answers. The school crossing supervisor, which I think we all agree was the best one, was Geraldine Hickey. [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] If I was able to concentrate a bit more, I absolutely would have addressed the fact that he didn't. But I couldn't get it out. I couldn't-- I just had to put it in an answer. Honestly, this game-- it's not scored correctly. The last should be the scores. And you are winning by a landslide. Oh, I already feel like I've won. [LAUGHTER] The basketball team won. That was Jason, the question writer, A.K. the house. Well done. Jason also wrote the one Lloyd went for about the escalating threats with the situation spiraling out of control. So that's a point for the house. Mm. Geraldine went for the one about his beautiful and slender wife. That was Lloyd. Yes. [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] That impressive food, obviously, how many words that you got out of before I could get out half of mine. That's well done. I'm very, very happy to give you a point for that. So that's three points, Kyle, for Lloyd there. One point for the house. It means no one got the correct answer. The real movie is about aliens and Americans teaming up against Nazis. He didn't read that out. [LAUGHTER] Did I not? You did. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I wouldn't believe that. [LAUGHTER] I would not have been the first song that had happened. [LAUGHTER] Hello, man. I was sweating for a second there. So while Kyle is figuring out the scores, I can-- can I read out at one quick user? There's no proper critic reviews of this movie. There's like Rotten Tomatoes. There's no member score for it. Audience consensus is 43%. But I really enjoyed this roller coaster of an audience member review about the film. And it goes like this. Zone Troopers is a movie that I'm glad I got to watch, but that's about it. [LAUGHTER] Watching it once was enough for me. The entire time, I was thinking, I'd like to see the aliens fighting alongside the Americans against the Nazis. And it does happen. But when it does, there's less than 10 minutes left in the movie. So I was like, when you wait a while for something to happen, only to think that it's over, or that I wasted my time just for that. The aliens laser guns, ray guns, whatever you want to call them, they were weak looking. When they shot them at the Germans and the Germans vanished in a thin air, it was weak as well. I don't know what I was expecting, but even for a low-budget movie, I expected something better. Not all of the movie was bad, though. There are a lot of times where I either laughed out loud or chuckled. [LAUGHTER] I didn't hate Zone Troopers. But I wasn't all that into it as much as I expected to be either. When I read the description, I thought, this movie is going to be awesome. And after watching it, I'm just sitting here like, it did have a 1950s sci-fi vibe to it for a movie made in the '80s, which I think was pretty cool. Maybe that's why the laser/ray guns effects were so weak. It was done on purpose to give it that 1950s sci-fi effect. I might have to give it a second look someday. [LAUGHTER] Even though I wasn't all that into it, I'd recommend checking it out if you were thinking about watching it. It's worth checking out, once at least, two stars. [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE] That's something I can relate to the ever teacher told me that I had to write. But there was a word scan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just had to kick it. Oh, oh, yeah. [LAUGHTER] All right, Kayle, can we get the final score check, please? All right, so we've got Jez on two. Give it up for Jez. [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] I'm happy. Thank you. And it gets interesting now, we've got a tie. [GASPS] Six of peas, the house and Lloyd. [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] Wow, that is-- I mean, you know, I've met my match today as the house. Is it a tiebreaker? No. [LAUGHTER] We'll share the trophy. Where can people find you, Lloyd? Yeah, so this is episode all-- [LAUGHTER] This episode all-- oh, sorry, I was just choosing to stand there. [LAUGHTER] This episode will come out in November, I think. Oh, OK. Yeah, in November. So I will have recently done a gig in July. [LAUGHTER] That's already sold out. [LAUGHTER] No, yeah, I don't-- But what's your best social media? Hey, maybe Instagram, Lloyd Langford 1. [LAUGHTER] Yeah, I don't know who the other one is, but I was-- I'm a later doctor of social media, so yeah. What about you, Jess? Geraldine Hickey. [LAUGHTER] Just one word on social media. Oh, I thought you were correcting me. [LAUGHTER] You can't call me, Jess, you call me Captain Geraldine Hickey. Well, that brings us to the end of the episode. So a big round of applause for our awesome guest. [APPLAUSE] Thanks so much for coming up. Thanks for listening. Cheers for tuning in, who you with Matt Schoon and Nate. Now that you know it, I'll be Matt Schoon with "Goodbye." [MUSIC PLAYING] Seven hardcore tales of physically manifested days of the week. From two-time Hugo of-- I'm sure he did a T-rex based one. Oh, yeah, he's done quite a few T-rex based ones. Sorry. Don't you worry about that. Oh, yeah. Oh, my word, he is. [LAUGHTER] It'd be very, very difficult because they have such small huns. Yes. Yeah, hand jobs are almost impossible. Very limited lover. Yes, and they never be able to do the stranger. Do you remember the stranger? You sit on your hand? [LAUGHTER] They can't do it. [LAUGHTER] Sad. That's one of the saddest things I've ever thought about. [LAUGHTER] I'd agree with that. [LAUGHTER] [MUSIC PLAYING] You can go see Faro's desk. This guy, he looks-- I'll show you what he looks like. I think he looks fantastic. It wasn't what I was picturing. But I don't think I would have ever pictured a man to look like this, to be honest. [LAUGHTER] Bum farto. There's like-- I'm just looking-- you can buy Halloween bum farto costumes. He looks-- I think he looks fantastic. This is bum farto. [LAUGHTER] Sort of, he looks like an Elvis impersonator sort of-- Yeah, it's poor Stas. [LAUGHTER] Yeah, some de rigor mortis has sat in. [LAUGHTER] Bum farto. So good. [MUSIC PLAYING] Lloyd. Yes. Have you done your show already today? Yes. Is there anything you'd like to tell-- this episode will probably come out in a month. Anything you want to tell people about things you've got coming up end of the year? [LAUGHTER] Sorry, no. I was about to, but Geraldine is angry about the prospect. [LAUGHTER] I just-- this-- I did not expect this to take-- be so hard to think and write and not-- like-- and tune everything else out. Yeah, yeah. This is not a game for anyone that is on the-- doesn't have a good brain. [LAUGHTER] It's very difficult because you're like trying to write the next option and also thinking, I'm missing out on all this sweet info about the part of it. [LAUGHTER] I cannot do two things at once. Someone's taking a photo out there. Oh, I know they're gone. All right, the answers are in for five minutes. Do I have any HD? Yes. [LAUGHTER] Yes. [LAUGHTER] [MUSIC PLAYING] Oh, I think you're doing a great job. [MUSIC PLAYING] Selling a little, or a lot? Shopify helps you do your thing, however you chit-ching. Shopify is the global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business. From the launch your online shop stage to the first real-life store stage, all the way to the did we just hit a million orders stage, Shopify is there to help you grow. Shopify helps you turn browsers into buyers with the internet's best converting checkout. 36% better on average compared to other leading commerce platforms because businesses that grow grow with Shopify. Get a $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com/work. Shopify.com/work. [BLANK_AUDIO]